Black Relationships : Wife makes more money than the husband.

[Coach707]

Good responses from everyone, but there is one element that is left out of this topic. We all know that one of the chracteristics of independent black women is the confidence. Confidence to the point that it would possibly conflict with a black man if he disagreed with any of her daily operations. I went through this with my fiance. I dont have a problem with a woman making more than me, but there are issues that will face a couple when the woman "wears the pants" financially in the relationship. Personally I love that she is independent and strong minded, but those same qualities are the cause of conflict in supreme authority over and over again. Im glad that things are different now, but it was difficult in the begining.


Guess its true what they say, the same thing that makes you laugh, will make you cry!

 

[Tantrum]

Good responses from everyone, but there is one element that is left out of this topic. We all know that one of the chracteristics of independent black women is the confidence. Confidence to the point that it would possibly conflict with a black man if he disagreed with any of her daily operations. I went through this with my fiance. I dont have a problem with a woman making more than me, but there are issues that will face a couple when the woman "wears the pants" financially in the relationship. Personally I love that she is independent and strong minded, but those same qualities are the cause of conflict in supreme authority over and over again. Im glad that things are different now, but it was difficult in the begining.


Guess its true what they say, the same thing that makes you laugh, will make you cry!

I have only experienced that
With female managers that I have had
It seems that they feel they
Have to be more demanding
To be respected in the workplace
Yet I do understand what you are saying

 

[mchinadoll]

True dat
Yet i dont think many woman
Would want to make more than the man
I think woman look at a man as a breed
winner and would want him to assume that role
Just my personal opinion though

I agree with you to an extent. Women do want a man who can provide for their family. It goes back to your cultural surroundings and upbringing. In today's society though, that is not all ways the case, because of the dynamics of black families especially.

I believe the key is communication. If I were a preacher, I would preach on communication, early in the relationship. Before the committments, and the marriage. You communicate openly about your wishes, wants and expectations. That way you know going in what is expected, and you have an opportunity to make a choice on whether or not this or that works for you and not go into something stumbling and learning as you go which is a lot harder than having a roadmap in the beginning. Of course people and situations change, but if you have a relationship roadmap, you have some guidance, and can maneuver around the word blocks much easier. Just me opinion.

 

[mchinadoll]

Good responses from everyone, but there is one element that is left out of this topic. We all know that one of the chracteristics of independent black women is the confidence. Confidence to the point that it would possibly conflict with a black man if he disagreed with any of her daily operations. I went through this with my fiance. I dont have a problem with a woman making more than me, but there are issues that will face a couple when the woman "wears the pants" financially in the relationship. Personally I love that she is independent and strong minded, but those same qualities are the cause of conflict in supreme authority over and over again. Im glad that things are different now, but it was difficult in the begining.


Guess its true what they say, the same thing that makes you laugh, will make you cry!

Coach707:

You make some very true statements. This is and has been an issue in my marriage. Not because of the money, but because of the confidence, and independence. I had to learn to continue to be confident and independent, but not to impress or force my confidence and indpendence on my spouse. We are both strong minded, and controlling individuals, so in conflict we both find ourselves in a battle of wills.

I had to learn to step back and take a look at the situation, and let my man be the man. But there are sometimes when what I have to offer is the best for the situation, and he needs to recognize that too. Right now we are going through a situation with his kids mother, and I know sometimes I can be a b$%^h when it comes to this issue. Other times I just say, the hell with it, there is bigger fish to fry and pick my battles carefully. But he knows me well and knows that there will be time when I will come out of a bag on him.

As far as financially, I handle all the finances. I have a better handle on finances. I am anal about how bills are paid, must be on time, and in full. He is more lackadaisical about bills, he pays them, but not necessary when they are do. I am a business owner, so I have to make sure my finances are on point at all times. So far it has worked, I am willing to tweak it if doesn't later on.

 

[oldiesman]

wife make more..

i would be thrilled if my wife made more than me[more money in my pocket]!