Black Relationships : what do i do with this feeling ........

[Auroraflower]

hi fam ...dear ones..


i need some advise...


sinds last year april i am doing fine...
actualy good better moving forward...
i was baptised and i was reborn ..
and from that day i was reborn almost everyday..

i learned a lot....
you have youre ups and downs but they were not so heavy before i was reborn means ....they did not draw me that deep..
you have youre trials ..still of course but that is a part of life(somthimes i think they become sharper after you been baptised i hoop not)and you always learn you never stop learning....




but i feld that i was moving forward...
and i did if i look back..
i knew where i wanted to go,my dreams became clearer..
for what i want to do and where i want to go to.....


than last monday....
i was in a car who had a collision....

and sinds than i am ...........


i dont know...

confused...



I am alive and thankfull.....



but sinds than i am not centered..
i,m out of balance....

i dont know..

One minut i am crying ..
than i am laughing...
than i am angry....


i,m like.....







i dont know me...
who am i..

and yet i know...


but i dont know....







Now some fooks here maybe know me as a person who can laugh hard true painfull tears ....or be a angry huricane but in a second laugh about sumthing funny that just passing by....

but this is different.....

besides of the heavy pain in my neck..
i have not gone to work...
because of this....

and i am not working that long there....
because i am going to emigrate...

and i wanted to have a nice last mond with these kids...
that i work with..

but how can i work with them ....
with these mood swings.....



i dont know am in a shock or sumthing ....

what is this.....?





my mom says .......
hold on sweety better days will come ...
soon.....

because i go to her ...
and i was going to start with a begginning of a new life..

and than i was ...

pff yeah ...i,m tired here....
but in a way i was doing better....
i was not flying ....you know floating like you know not noticing that it is going well seeing it as normal....
I was still reaching out to people around here in holland in the community my family not thinking only about you...i,m doing so welly welly...so forget about the rest..
i was happy..(still) sinds i was batised and dicided to walk with jezus more..
and grow closer to the father.......






and now i am ....

confused....


i,m like should i continuing following my dreams..
does it matter...
if i reach out or not...




i,m out of balance....



am i in a shock....


is this what they call a shock.....?

what is this......



ofcourse you dont have all the answers...

 

[PurpleMoons]

That's scarey Sis!

I don't know if its shock or not, but I'm happy to hear that you are ok.

 

[river]

Sista Auroraflower,

Painful experiences come to pass. That means they don't come to stay.

The words that i can think to say will not make the pain go away, but your spirit inside you will.

Breathe deeply, slowly. Let the tears rinse your eyes then pass like water under the bridge. Your emotions will tell you no that it will never go away. Don't believe that. Time heals all wounds.

 

[SWEETS]

YOUR ADVISE IS DOWN BELOW!

ISAIAH 55:9 SAYS AS THE HEAVENS ARE HIGHER THAN THE EARTH, SO ARE MY WAYS HIGHER THEN YOUR WAYS AND MY THOUGHTS THAN YOUR THOUGHTS. PROVERBS 3:5-6 TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, DO NOT LEAN TO OWN UNDERSTANDING, ACKNOWLEDGE HIM IN ALL YOUR WAYS AND HE WILL MAKE YOUR PATHS STRAIGHT. SO BE ENCOURAGED. AND ALWAYS, REMEMBER TO KNOW THAT IF NOBODY GOT CHO' BACK GOD GOT CHO' BACK, GOD IS ALWAYS THERE WHEN WE THINK HE'S NOT JUST THANK HIM ANYWAY FOR WHATEVER IT MAY BE GOOD, BAD, HAPPY OR SAD. GOD BLESS YOU. PRAY FOR ME TOO

hi fam ...dear ones..


i need some advise...


sinds last year april i am doing fine...
actualy good better moving forward...
i was baptised and i was reborn ..
and from that day i was reborn almost everyday..

i learned a lot....
you have youre ups and downs but they were not so heavy before i was reborn means ....they did not draw me that deep..
you have youre trials ..still of course but that is a part of life(somthimes i think they become sharper after you been baptised i hoop not)and you always learn you never stop learning....




but i feld that i was moving forward...
and i did if i look back..
i knew where i wanted to go,my dreams became clearer..
for what i want to do and where i want to go to.....


than last monday....
i was in a car who had a collision....

and sinds than i am ...........


i dont know...

confused...



I am alive and thankfull.....



but sinds than i am not centered..
i,m out of balance....

i dont know..

One minut i am crying ..
than i am laughing...
than i am angry....


i,m like.....







i dont know me...
who am i..

and yet i know...


but i dont know....







Now some fooks here maybe know me as a person who can laugh hard true painfull tears ....or be a angry huricane but in a second laugh about sumthing funny that just passing by....

but this is different.....

besides of the heavy pain in my neck..
i have not gone to work...
because of this....

and i am not working that long there....
because i am going to emigrate...

and i wanted to have a nice last mond with these kids...
that i work with..

but how can i work with them ....
with these mood swings.....



i dont know am in a shock or sumthing ....

what is this.....?





my mom says .......
hold on sweety better days will come ...
soon.....

because i go to her ...
and i was going to start with a begginning of a new life..

and than i was ...

pff yeah ...i,m tired here....
but in a way i was doing better....
i was not flying ....you know floating like you know not noticing that it is going well seeing it as normal....
I was still reaching out to people around here in holland in the community my family not thinking only about you...i,m doing so welly welly...so forget about the rest..
i was happy..(still) sinds i was batised and dicided to walk with jezus more..
and grow closer to the father.......






and now i am ....

confused....


i,m like should i continuing following my dreams..
does it matter...
if i reach out or not...




i,m out of balance....



am i in a shock....


is this what they call a shock.....?

what is this......



ofcourse you dont have all the answers...