Black Relationships : Women who pick up alot of weight after marriage.

[kente417mojo]

This will be my last post on this. Kente, you may not be doing it on purpose, but you don stomped all over some self-esteem here. You are causing some Sistas who are reading this to begin to doubt their desireability or feel unlovable, unwanted, unworthwhile, or moreso than some did before because you've become a spokeman, in a sense, for all the brothas or men out there who are weight-intolerant.

Self-esteem is all about: feeling like you're lovable, wanted and worthwhile. Sistas know there are other brothas out there who feel the exact same way you do, so it's not just your rejection they'll be thinking about when they're walking down the street. As they approach each Brotha, some of them will be wondering whether he thinks the exact same way you do. Many Brothas don't, but how can the Sista know that?

Yes, health is the MOST important part of all of this. That's what I said this morning. Sistas already know this too, but it's not that simple for anybody who deals with this issue.

Well Riada, my intention was not to make anybody feel bad. I certainly don't want to make anyone feel like the physical appearance is #1 priority. I just feel that people need to be more considerate when it comes to their weight..IF they have a mate to think about. That's all. I'm just saying that I would feel extremely dissappointed and turned-off if I married a 120 lb woman and she blew up to double that size. It just doesn't make sense to me and I hate when people try and use excuses as to why it happens when (IMO) it's just a lack of desire and action to do anything about it. But I'll just shut up and keep it movin', because if I'm hurting feelings, then it's really not worth talking about anymore.

 

[kente417mojo]

So as long as they don't get fat they can continue to clog up their arteries, shoot up their cholesterol and put themselves at risk for diabetes? I say this because this is what happens when you eat bad PERIOD. Some people have the ability to process the junk better so it doesn't accumulate as fat... still doesn't mean it isn't hurting their heart, especially if they don't exercise to get the blood flowing.

That's true, but (as bad as it sounds) at least you don't have to deal with them looking all sloppy and unattractive. Like I said though, it's not all about the weight. If my lady was getting sick and her health was suffering, she'd had to stop with the junk also. If she was smoking, she'd have to stop. If she drank too much alcohol, she'd have to stop. If anything is effecting your relationship negatively, you need to stop it. People want to act like getting fat doesn't effect anything, and those people are fooling themselves.

Last post.

 

[cursed heart]

That's true, but (as bad as it sounds) at least you don't have to deal with them looking all sloppy and unattractive. Like I said though, it's not all about the weight. If my lady was getting sick and her health was suffering, she'd had to stop with the junk also. If she was smoking, she'd have to stop. If she drank too much alcohol, she'd have to stop. If anything is effecting your relationship negatively, you need to stop it. People want to act like getting fat doesn't effect anything, and those people are fooling themselves.

Last post.

So you are looking for the perfect healthy woman in your opinion!
What if she lacks in other areas? Brains, a job,sensitivity,compatable sex drive,can't cook, not motherly,not church going,sense of humor
You are telling me that you will try to change a grown woman and mold her into what you want her to be?
You need a barbie doll not a woman! It's not all about what you want!

 

[cursed heart]

That's true, but (as bad as it sounds) at least you don't have to deal with them looking all sloppy and unattractive. Like I said though, it's not all about the weight. If my lady was getting sick and her health was suffering, she'd had to stop with the junk also. If she was smoking, she'd have to stop. If she drank too much alcohol, she'd have to stop. If anything is effecting your relationship negatively, you need to stop it. People want to act like getting fat doesn't effect anything, and those people are fooling themselves.

Last post.

And all big women are not sloppy!:maddd:
You are a tripppppppp!
I dress better and I have much more class about my attire than most slim women!
And just because you are small does not mean you have a shape!
I see small women in apple bottom jeans looking like pancake bottoms with pot bellies!
If I get a pair of apple bottoms babyyyyyyyyyyy they wouldn't come outside that day!

 

[mchinadoll]

Cursed heart:

You tell'em baby.