Black Relationships : Are black women planning to have children without being married

[Sekhemu]

Awsome

Yes Brother Panafrica, we are having social abnormities affecting our community…but as the Last Poets said “related to what”?

If we read this except from this article, it is definitely not “whorish Black women” creating the problems; maybe “some of our abnormalities” say we are better than everybody else!

Our situation, as I said, is multifaceted; the ills along with the successes. We can’t oversimplify this issue with generalizations and name-calling. And the group that is usually accused of making the worst decisions (young Black females), is out shining everybody!

I think Black women are taking control of their lives and the Black males dilemma of the so-called “shiftless Negro” character is dieing out of the picture…we must read these facts carefully, there is good and bad here.

Also please read the whole article after you read this excerpt…if I haven’t said, too much that has been “interesting or thought provoking” I think this article will!! (link at bottom of page)


More black women putting off kids to
focus on career


Decline in group’s birth rate being influenced by several factors

By VICTOR MANUEL RAMOS The Orlando Sentinel

“The reduction in teen pregnancies is a big factor, because in black women a lot of the childbearing took place in the younger ages. … The major decline among them has outpaced all other groups. It’s really quite striking.”
Stephanie Ventura Demographer and chief of the reproductive-statistics branch at the National Center for Health Statistics


Economic betterment


Patrick Mason, an economics professor who directs the African American Studies program at Florida State University, learned from his fertility research that black women are postponing motherhood in pursuit of economic improvement.

More black women than men attend college, Mason said. So not only are black women, married or unmarried, avoiding having children to stay on course, but some of the younger women struggle to find men who meet their expectations, Mason said.

Mason studied statistics from the 1990s for unmarried 25-year-olds whose earnings put them above the poverty level for a family of four.

He found that there were about 300 single black men living above the poverty level for every 1,000 black women in the same category.

“If you think of marriage as mainly an economic event, you can see what’s going on,” Mason adds.

“What it means to be a husband is to be a breadwinner. So, if you are not making enough to be a breadwinner, you are not marriage-eligible in the minds of women as well as men.”

Ya’Frica Tadesse — whose first name is pronounced YAH-fri-ca, similarly to the name of the continent of Africa — and her friends share the sentiment. She meets weekly with three sorority sisters to discuss their experiences and drink cappuccinos — a ritual they’ve embraced after graduating from the University of Central Florida.

Recently they spoke about how their single lives can be a stigma in family circles, where strong women have traditionally been motherly figures.

“Why should we, why should I, settle for less?” asks Stephanie Franklin, 31, one of Tadesse’s friends who is a copy editor at the Hometown News in Fort Pierce, Fla.

“A lot of family members think that something must be wrong. They have actually asked me if I’m lesbian because it’s almost as if people want for you to bring a husband and have a bunch of kids.”

“Not having children now is a change we wanted to make,” said Suzanne McPherson, 27, an elementary-school teacher who lives in Casselberry, Fla.



‘Zero kids’ for now


Rosilyn Williams’ mother, for example, was in her teens when she started her family. She had four children.

Her maternal grandmother had 10 children. Williams’ twin sister has four. Williams, a radiology technologist who is 25, says she has “zero kids” and plans to keep it that way for now.

“If we’re going to be dominant figures, why not be dominant professionally?” Williams said.

Tadesse relays that message of caution to others as manager for youth education and prevention at the Metropolitan Orlando Urban League, a social-service organization that sponsors a pregnancy-prevention program with schools.

She says young women struggle with the contradictory message of excelling without becoming lonely women.

“For me that was kind of the plan,” Tadesse said. “You graduate from high school, you graduate from college; then you think about a family.

My parents told me that, and now it’s like, ‘The waiting is over. Can you really get started now?’”




More black women putting off kids to focus on career

Next step... More Black women Pastors and Ministers/Healers/MedicineWOman...Perhaps!

 

[Sun Ship]

Brother Sunship In a topic about black women who are planning to have children without the benefit or marriage or a father's involvement (and its natural extension of father's who don't provide for their children).

Brother Pan, the only thing that was asked the original title was:

Are black women planning to have children without being married

We all know the numbers of single parent households, headed by black women, But are some sistahs deciding to have children without requiring a ring? Share your thoughts

You are creating the sub-title:

(and its natural extension of father's who don't provide for their children)

...its “NATURAL EXTENSION???”
Where did you get that from??????????

You’re stretchin’ brother…

This statement is not implied in the heading and is certainly not a given, as we review the original title. If anything, I just replied to that supposition when it was articulated.

So the question is not how does my post relate to each other, but how did you craftily make such a leap and assert that “deadbeat dads” is a “NATURAL” extension to this topic?

…and the article presented is not just about Black women who are refusing to have children…and if you don’t see any connections to my post or understand the broader implications easily ascertained from that article, than Brother Pan ...I'm sorry...I can’t help you…

 

[panafrica]

…and the article presented is not just about Black women who are refusing to have children…and if you don’t see any connections to my post or understand the broader implications easily ascertained from that article, than Brother Pan ...I'm sorry...I can’t help you…

Brother SunShip you don't need to help me, I'm concerned about helping the children who are being abandoned by fathers & being raised without the guidance of fathers. You are correct this topic is being stretched, it has become 15 different topics, but the most important issue still has not be addressed! It has been covered over with 14 other issues!

 

[Sun Ship]

I just saw your post before last Brother Pan…the article I present proves that many Black women ARE REFUSING TO HAVE CHILDREN IRRESPONSIBLY, without suitable mates…and that there is also a shortage of Black men who can support productive families…

Now, either sister’s should close their legs and not have fatherless children or they should have children anyway, regardless of who impregnates them or that man’s ability to provide for their family!

Let’s get realistic, most Sister’s with master degrees are not going to marry and have children by a man frying French fries at McDonalds!

And even with those dismal statistics of Black men in college (which can easily be compounded with job displacement in the inner-city), eventually “some” of these sisters are going to have a child, because nature is going to dictate that.

But for the most part, you’re eventually left with the old tired hoochies and ho’s that you despise, populating our community, because the educated Black women and the young Black women are NOW refusing to have babies by men who can’t provide for a family. It is just the opposite, of what has been implied and asserted in this thread!!

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and to answer your last post, what are you addressing besides attacks and character assasination... what is the solution, Brother...new child support laws? We see the sisters are not as whorish as you think! Let's focus on the "shiftless Negroes"...how are you going to change them?

Peace

 

[panafrica]

I just saw your post before last Brother Pan…the article I present proves that many Black women ARE REFUSING TO HAVE CHILDREN IRRESPONSIBLY, without suitable mates…and that there is also a shortage of Black men who can support productive families…

Now, either sister’s should close their legs and not have fatherless children or they should have children anyway, regardless of who impregnates them or that man’s ability to provide for their family!

Let’s get realistic, most Sister’s with master degrees are not going to marry and have children by a man frying French fries at McDonalds!

And even with those dismal statistics of Black men in college (which can easily be compounded with job displacement in the inner-city), eventually “some” of these sisters are going to have a child, because nature is going to dictate that.

But for the most part, you’re eventually left with the old tired hoochies and ho’s that you despise, populating our community, because the educated Black women and the young Black women are NOW refusing to have babies by men who can’t provide for a family. It is just the opposite, of what has been implied and asserted in this thread!!

-------

and to answer your last post, what are you addressing besides attacks and character assasination... what is the solution, Brother...new child support laws? We see the sisters are not as whorish as you think! Let's focus on the "shiftless Negroes"...how are you going to change them?

Peace

Sun Ship don't insult my intelligence or motivations. No where have I said that all black women are having children irresponsibly. It is obvious that there are many black women who are not doing this. I don't need you to point this out to me. My mother did not, my wife (who also has 2 Masters Degrees) did not, my mother in-law did not. Indeed every black woman in my immediate circle did not. The subject of the conversation; however, is women that do have children irresponsibly. Switching the topic to those who don't have children irresponsibly (because you don't want to talk about that) doesn't address that many do. Indeed it doesn't address the fact that many MORE don't! Brother Sun Ship you aren't dealing with the realities of the community.

I'm not a white man, that is unaware of the day to day life in the African American experience. Who needs to obtain a balance of positive & negative reports in order to judge progress in the black community. Who is trying to decide if the African American community is worthy of existance based on what he learns. No brother Sun Ship I am a member of the African American community. I'm aware of all the good and the bad. Although I celebrate the good (and the good needs to be celebrated), the bad can not be ignored. That head in the sand mentality has done untold harm in our community!

The achievements of the college educated black woman are fantastic. As are the achievements of the college educated black man (which I am a part of). If I want a feel good story, I can always go back to them. However the college educated black woman and black man does not make up the majority of our community. It is just the opposite. Roughly only 14% of our community (15% for Black women) are obtaining Bachelors Degrees or higher. These numbers are certainly increasing, including the amount of black men in college (despite popular reports). However the amount of college educated black people aren't increasing so rapidly that it changes the fact that the uncollege educated black woman and man make up the overwhelming majority (at least 80%) of our community. The progress of a community depends the progress of the majority, not just the elite. Afterall many of these "all important" college educated black folk step off the college campus, and never step foot into the black community (physically or mentally) ever again! This reality is what made Dr. WEB Du Bois' talented tenth ultimately irrelevant for advancing our race. Also might I point out that there are college educated black women who are also having children out of wedlock! This issue is about upbring, not lack of formal education!

Is my solution to the undeniable problem of a large number African American men not caring for or providing for their children; and a large number of African American women purposefully having children by men who aren't likely to provide for them and their children; new child support laws? No this isn't my solution. Child support doesn't address my major concern, which is a large number (actually the majority) of children being raised in our community without the guidance of their father. Money does not substitute the presence of a father. This remains true when a woman is "financially" able to support a child by herself. A "father figure" is not a father! An uncle is not a father! An older cousin is not a father! A big brother is not a father! The children of our community deserve to have their fathers (not court ordered checks from their father) actively involved in their daily life.

My thoughts along a solution to this problem is re-educating the community on the importance of having a father in the home. Educating black men (really black boys because that is where it must start) about their obligations to the children they create. That they must provide for said children irregardless of their feelings about the mother, and her new boyfriend. Even better yet teaching him that he shouldn't even have children by a woman he doesn't intend to make his wife. Along the same lines the black woman needs to be re-educated about the importance of choosing a man who capable of being a good father & provider for her children. That financial ability is not the sole determining factor in deciding on a man. That she should not have children by a man, who does not think enough about her, to make her his wife. Apparently you think this is impossible, so much so that you don't want to even talk about it!