Lots of good advice here from Mama Destee. It has not fallen on deaf ears in my I in I.
Some insight into the strange and bizarre mind of Istlota ...
From various recent experiences, I have discovered the value of what I call the Melatonin Moment as a Way to tap into the Omniscience of what has been called Akashic Records [aka Universal Consciousness]. A Key to using it successfully involves how/when to enter Dream state and what to do when you return to Waking state.
Two examples of this involve a couple of Ah-Ha revelations which led to my recent Flow into Virtual Polar Coordinate Routing [VPCR] and again into Eclipse Plugin Development [PDE]. But, more relevant to this discussion is a third example --- a Flow towards not eliminating, but rather reconciling, two approaches to Seeking the Kingdom of Heaven. This is a struggle which goes on in the I in I all the time and is reflected in submissions of mine here on Destee such as this thread.
The aforementioned two approaches --- the dichotomy. Have you noticed that the biblical Jesus seemed to have two different personalities? One was that of the humble 'bruised reed' 'shaken in the wind' [Matthew 12:20]. But a second persona, not at all humble but rather in your face bodacious, was the fire-breathing critic of the Pharisees [Matthew 23].
Now, I know, somebody somewhere is already thinking this sort of talk sounds spiritual, maybe even religious, and should be moved to another thread. But I beg your indulgence a little bit longer.
I also exhibit both of these personalities [some might, not unreasonably, call it a bipolar disorder]. One Istlota seeks the Oneness of Love between All. But the other Istlota seeks to fashion a scourge of small cords and drive the moneychangers out of the temple [John 2:15].
Grok?