PurpleMoons said:Yes Sister, I've read it. lol
That thread definately had it's press and curl highs and lows.
The encouragement you're giving us Sisters for accepting our natural
beauty is beautiful in itself. Its been about a year since my last perm, and I must confess I haven't totally embraced it in its completeness. I keep it braided with the extentions. The ends of my hair still have some of the processed hair on them. I could simply cut it off but I decided to let it fall off on it's on.
I'm considering locking it, but that still up in the air. I do like change from time to time, and locking may be to permanent. Idunno. time will tell.
Sister Purple ... please share some of your pressing comb memories in that thread Gurl! Oh my gosh, i need a good laugh, and reading that thread always gives me one! Whew! Spicy is krazee funnee in there!
In regard to the encouragement that i might be giving to Sisters to accept their natural selves, their natural hair ... it really isn't about Sisters, in particular, that i'm targeting ... it's the babies. See, if it were just Sisters, the current adult generation, making personal choices for themselves, i wouldn't have much to say. Grown folk do what they wanna do. But since i've gone natural, it's like a bigger understanding, a bigger picture has come into view for me, and i see the babies. I see the generations coming behind us, with no hope of loving themselves, unless their Mommas teach them how.
It's so deep Sister Purple. If adult Sisters could straighten their hair, and it not affect what their children think of themselves, i wouldn't care. But that's not how it works. The children watch us. The children learn what is beautiful from us. Our sons see us straightening our hair like white women, and then we wonder why Black Men want white women. I think this feeds that. If Black Women were primping in the mirror, fixing their 'fros, looking all pretty, smiling at themselves, their Sons and Daughters would know that this is what beautiful is. But instead, we primp with straight hair. Run to the beautician to kill our natural coils, spending billions a year on making ourselves something other than what we are. We plant these seeds in the babies.
It's got to stop, and we have the ability to stop this ... right here and now.
So ... if a Sister is encouraged for herself, that is a blessing, but the greatest blessing of all, is the message she sends her little Black Babies ... her Sons and Daughters, and the generations behind them ... that they are BEAUTIFUL just as God made them.
In regard to fully accepting your own personal transition ... that's something else i know about ... whew! If i hadn't gone through it myself, i would not have a clue as to the challenge it is. It's amazing how hard it is to accept and love yourself as you are. There's no commercials with products helping us know what and how to do with our own stuff. There's no images in magazines, there's nothing. You're almost alone in this walk, going totally against the grain. It took me all of this year and a half to get where i am, and i'm probably not all the way there yet myself. Probably not embracing my coils in their fullness ... i don't know. How can i be, after denying them for the vast majority of my life. It really is a process, but you can be encouraged Sister, that you are on the road, and with the passing of more time, you'll get further down it. Your babies are seeing you now. They are looking at Momma wondering, why Momma wearing her hair like that?
... You're already planting the seeds in the babies, and that's the goal.I see how hard it is for us to love our own selves, and we're adults. We just can't leave this task to our babies, for them to teach coming generations. This hard work is for us to do, and we can't forsake or deny it. If we do, all we're really doing, is giving it (the hard work) to our babies, or their babies to do.
What Loving Momma does that?
I Love You Sister Purple!
Destee
I know how your heart felt. I can surely understand crumbling under such a gesture. It is every Mother's hope, that their children will love them properly, and that is evidence of it. They don't know that what they're asking for, is further manipulation of our minds. They don't know. We didn't know. Our Mothers didn't know. So of course the babies don't know. All they know is their Momma isn't looking like she's always looked, like everybody else looks ... and they wanna fix that! So Beautiful!
But from that time to this, she has grown so much ... just from watching me. And not really even watching me, as we are miles apart. Another indicator of the power Mothers have. Even with many miles between us, i am probably one of the greatest influences in her life.
