The Danger of Being A Black Man

[Sun Ship]

...with unity there is strenght

That was a powerful message sister Queenie, I can’t debate or disagree with many of the things you have said and your sincerity, ...but all I would like to add is, we need to find progressive strategies to combat the destruction of Black men, Black women and children in the context of this patriarchal society. I cannot totally detach from my functional role as a protective and assertive Black man with all of its complexities, if it has a progressive angle that can counteract the onslaught of brutish, boorish and aggressive patrilinealism (even if some of my actions seem traditional). And Black women must skillfully address their complimentary roles also.

Remember, “By Any Means Necessary”


Ashe!! Brother Sun Ship

 

[Queenie]

I agree with you Brother Sun Ship. It has taken me many years to even begin to grasp a simple understanding and respect for the leadership role that most Black men feel they have been proscribed when it comes to their mates and their families. When I was younger I didn't fully appreciate how important this was to building a healthy state of mind and family unit. Not that women can't do this alone, but I'm sure that most single mothers, if given a choice, would prefer to have a family structure that includes a man who wants to be in a leadership role.

Black women, whether they want a man in their lives or not, should appreciate and respect our men enough to value their role in our families and our society and have the desire to want to help them to achieve great things in life. Hopefully, the same respect and admiration will be reciprocal.

Queenie

 

[toylin]

I agree with you Brother Sun Ship. It has taken me many years to even begin to grasp a simple understanding and respect for the leadership role that most Black men feel they have been proscribed when it comes to their mates and their families. When I was younger I didn't fully appreciate how important this was to building a healthy state of mind and family unit. Not that women can't do this alone, but I'm sure that most single mothers, if given a choice, would prefer to have a family structure that includes a man who wants to be in a leadership role.

Black women, whether they want a man in their lives or not, should appreciate and respect our men enough to value their role in our families and our society and have the desire to want to help them to achieve great things in life. Hopefully, the same respect and admiration will be reciprocal.

Queenie

Well said!

As a "single" mother (I use single losely because my son's father is in his life), I find myself worrying how growing up with his parents in two different places will affect my son.

One thing I have said before, and will continue to say, we have a lot of un-learning to do. Maybe if Black men and women stop all the time and learn how to work together without accusations and past hurts getting in the way, we can rebuild our community.

 

[bobo]

This is very interesting, but if a man isn't man enough to stand up take care of his responsibilities then what can anyone else do? I know for a fact that slavery screwed us up and we have yet to fully heal, but we can't lean on that for everything. I think one thing we can do to heal the black family is to show better judgement when choosing a mate, male or female. Women are choosing men that are choosing to be irresponsible and men are choosing women who don't want or don't appreciate the virtues of an honorable man. We need to be more selective in who we give our bodies to.

Sure black men are powerless in MANY situations and to be honest most of the time I feel as if I have nothing but enemies as a black man; that I can't really trust or rely on anyone. But there's simply no excuse to abandon your offspring. It's too bad these guys are so afraid of failing yet they show no fear when it comes to getting some.

The reason for that is caused by society. Black people make choices that are governed by this ignorant, influential culture that tries to set a basis for living and they seem to ignore their true feelings and just want to fit in. There are few brothers and sisters in between that living on their own terms, outside of society, and they are ridculed by their own people.

 

[bobo]

Well said!

As a "single" mother (I use single losely because my son's father is in his life), I find myself worrying how growing up with his parents in two different places will affect my son.

One thing I have said before, and will continue to say, we have a lot of un-learning to do. Maybe if Black men and women stop all the time and learn how to work together without accusations and past hurts getting in the way, we can rebuild our community.

I agree with what you said, but some of us black men are limited in thought. Black people place boundaries created by themselves in their heads. They may automatically think that they are unable to achieve certain goals because of who they are, or where they live.