Black Spirituality Religion : The Quality of our Fate depends on how we treat Black Women

Brother Enki ... i closed that MsInterpret thread because it was disruptive, in an attempt to maintain our peace. You bringing partial quotes from it (the closed thread) makes my closing it ineffective ... 'cause you're continuing the disruption anyway ... which is a rule violation.



The fact that this thread and Brother Perfection rubs some of yall the wrong way, does not give any of you the right to harass him. If you don't like him or what he says, put him on ignore. He's entitled to share his opinion without being personally attacked.

You gotta leave him alone, if you can't engage within the confines of our rules. This is a warning.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee

I see what the problem is sista Destee, and it is my fault. I was reading brutha's MS234's post #573 that is in this thread, and clicked on the link that took me to another one of his post. In that post he was addressing brutha Perfection and I assumed it was his words. My bad, I didn't noticed the thread was closed. But aside from that, I don't think I was harassing him by asking him the question I did. Which was this:

So I take it that for a black man to be strong, he has to agree with all of what you've written?

After asking him this question I gave my opinion which I though we all had the right to do. He has 118 pages of his opinions


We want and need unity, we say this but how can we have it is we quantify what is black, intelligence, or what is a "real black man".


Now this is what you said:

Also ... it's a rule violation to call a Member out of their name (hypocrite), personalizing the discussion.

Calling someone this is not name calling really, it's describing their behavior, or actions, also it challenges for character. Perfection said this himself that this is what needs to be done, so that is what I did.

But If this is the case, Perfection should have gotten the same warning for calling brutha James "pugnacious" and issuing a threat.

The below comment is in this unlocked thread, and post #549

let this be an opportunity for you to walk away from this question gracefully. no harm...no foul my good sir. because if you become too pugnacious and too insistent I may unleash on you, intellectually, what I have been holding back all these months from you and your small group.

James took the same offense as you can clearly see in his response, post #551

And to show how his words are also offensive, here is a comment from brutha Chuck concerning being told he's not a real man.


chuck said:
Please, just let it go, James...

We know what it means to be men, and we also know which womenfolk feel/think/etc. likewise...

And here is here, calling brutha Khasm names in post#577, in response to post #576, which is by Khasm.


but no. instead one becomes evasive, irate and obtuse.

All of these words and more are in the same category as "hypocrite", they are describing a person's action, behavior, or character.

And it's not just me that sees the imbalance of this thread. Below is a comment by sista Candeesweet.


To each its own. Don't go overboard sweetie. Leave something for the challege. I ain't all bad. nor good sad to say. Should i start a balance forum for gents and queens.?




Comments made by Perfection in these contexts bring a certain amount of disruption itself. But I have no problem following the rules, It's easier for me to just not respond to a person. But if we have to watch our wordage, he should have to also. So since I done with him, I tell you, respect goes both ways.

Peace sista and much luv....:grouphug:

Peace!
 
Brother Enki ... i closed that MsInterpret thread because it was disruptive, in an attempt to maintain our peace. You bringing partial quotes from it (the closed thread) makes my closing it ineffective ... 'cause you're continuing the disruption anyway ... which is a rule violation.

Also ... it's a rule violation to call a Member out of their name (hypocrite), personalizing the discussion.

The fact that this thread and Brother Perfection rubs some of yall the wrong way, does not give any of you the right to harass him. If you don't like him or what he says, put him on ignore. He's entitled to share his opinion without being personally attacked.

You gotta leave him alone, if you can't engage within the confines of our rules. This is a warning.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee

I have a question sista Destee. Out of all the threads, and post that are current, what drew you to look at this thread? Is there a target painted on this thread every time is is resurrected, or is Perfection running to you (he has that right) when ever some one uses a word that he feels is disrespectful? If so, this is an inconsistency on your part because I've seen you tell other to put people on ignore, or develop a thick skin. I'm just scratching my head because everyday, we use words to describe each others behavior all the time with no problem. Some even resort to actual name calling (IMO) using words like "stupid", "Negro",etc. with out a peep.

I was just wondering why my common use word was deemed as name calling, and his isn't.

Peace!
 
I have a question sista Destee. Out of all the threads, and post that are current, what drew you to look at this thread? Is there a target painted on this thread every time is is resurrected, or is Perfection running to you (he has that right) when ever some one uses a word that he feels is disrespectful? If so, this is an inconsistency on your part because I've seen you tell other to put people on ignore, or develop a thick skin. I'm just scratching my head because everyday, we use words to describe each others behavior all the time with no problem. Some even resort to actual name calling (IMO) using words like "stupid", "Negro",etc. with out a peep.

I was just wondering why my common use word was deemed as name calling, and his isn't.

Peace!


Brother Enki ... i'll answer the above post first.

Threads that initiate warnings, are disruptive, etc., generally get and keep my attention.

Prior to now, i have posted in this thread 13 times, all moderating ... working ... no just having fun.

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-39#post-783073

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-39#post-783089

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783242

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783245

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-42#post-783250

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783255

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783950

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-784530

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-786836

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-786840

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-816009

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-816094

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783255

Yeah, it's on my radar, and no, Brother Perfection did not report anything in it to me.

When a thread has this kind of light on it, already proven itself disruptive, it's best to stay out of it if'n all you have is challenge that may cross the lines of decorum, for i am generally watching ... and the chances are great you'll get caught up in it ... just by standing too close ... after 13 warning posts ... my patience has run thin.

When behavior does not rise to the level of a violation, i tell the Member to toughen up or put the Member on ignore. I don't tell a Member to do that, if there is a violation. If there is a violation, then i warn for that violation. So, when you see me telling someone to toughen up, etc., there was not a violation of our rules.

Not every mention / description of someone will be a violation. More than just a specific word said, goes into whether a violation is issued. Some folk have tougher skin than others, and what might actually be a violation, can be overlooked because the Members involved can handle the exchange positively. For example, i call Sister Honey1201 ... Honey Chile ... now ... if we weren't comfortable enough with each other ... she might take offense at my doing that ... report me ... and i'd be warned to only call her by the name she registered with.

That's why we have this policy ... You Want Consistency in our Management - Here It Is.

There are often so many particulars, so many bigger picture stories being played out in the forest floor skirmishes, that managing it all can be quite daunting ... and the last thing we need is to have to mediate failed engagements of adults, and satisfy every Member with our resolution ... it's just way too much ... so we have a policy giving all to know that we will not do that.

In this thread for example, i know the Brothers have been riding Brother Perfection. I don't understand it. I don't see any violations on his part, yet yall are on him ... so i'm watching ... for it's my job to insure that each Member gets what we have to give ... and that is a peaceful, respectful community in which to engage.

I don't see all the violations, that's for sure, so please report any you see ... for mentioning them only when you get warned ... makes them not count quite as much in my book.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee
 
I see what the problem is sista Destee, and it is my fault. I was reading brutha's MS234's post #573 that is in this thread, and clicked on the link that took me to another one of his post. In that post he was addressing brutha Perfection and I assumed it was his words. My bad, I didn't noticed the thread was closed. But aside from that, I don't think I was harassing him by asking him the question I did. Which was this:

After asking him this question I gave my opinion which I though we all had the right to do. He has 118 pages of his opinions

We want and need unity, we say this but how can we have it is we quantify what is black, intelligence, or what is a "real black man".

Now this is what you said:

Calling someone this is not name calling really, it's describing their behavior, or actions, also it challenges for character. Perfection said this himself that this is what needs to be done, so that is what I did.

But If this is the case, Perfection should have gotten the same warning for calling brutha James "pugnacious" and issuing a threat.

The below comment is in this unlocked thread, and post #549

James took the same offense as you can clearly see in his response, post #551

And to show how his words are also offensive, here is a comment from brutha Chuck concerning being told he's not a real man.

And here is here, calling brutha Khasm names in post#577, in response to post #576, which is by Khasm.

All of these words and more are in the same category as "hypocrite", they are describing a person's action, behavior, or character.

And it's not just me that sees the imbalance of this thread. Below is a comment by sista Candeesweet.

Comments made by Perfection in these contexts bring a certain amount of disruption itself. But I have no problem following the rules, It's easier for me to just not respond to a person. But if we have to watch our wordage, he should have to also. So since I done with him, I tell you, respect goes both ways.

Peace sista and much luv....:grouphug:

Peace!


Quoting from a closed thread, to keep the discussion going, will always be a violation. I realize you didn't know you were doing that, but it's no less wrong, which is why you were warned. It's all good in the hood, if now that you know, you stop.

Also ... calling someone a hypocrite will always be a violation ... if i see it.

I didn't read all the posts, haven't seen all the possible violations, but if you click on the REPORT link under each post that you feel is a violation, give me a few words as to why you think it's a violation, i'll take a look at them. Doing it this way, allows me to try to read a bit of the context in which the words were said ... helping me to make as fair a decision as i can. Even with this though, i don't dig deep.

For the record though ... it's never good to let your defense to violating, be that someone else violated too and/or first ... i mean ... that really has nothing to do with you violating.

But if you want me to take a look at some other possible violations, click the REPORT link under said posts.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee
 
Brother Enki ... i'll answer the above post first.

Threads that initiate warnings, are disruptive, etc., generally get and keep my attention.

Prior to now, i have posted in this thread 13 times, all moderating ... working ... no just having fun.

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-39#post-783073

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-39#post-783089

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783242

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783245

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-42#post-783250

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783255

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783950

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-784530

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-786836

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-786840

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-816009

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-816094

http://destee.com/index.php?threads...e-treat-black-women.74798/page-41#post-783255

Yeah, it's on my radar, and no, Brother Perfection did not report anything in it to me.

When a thread has this kind of light on it, already proven itself disruptive, it's best to stay out of it if'n all you have is challenge that may cross the lines of decorum, for i am generally watching ... and the chances are great you'll get caught up in it ... just by standing too close ... after 13 warning posts ... my patience has run thin.

When behavior does not rise to the level of a violation, i tell the Member to toughen up or put the Member on ignore. I don't tell a Member to do that, if there is a violation. If there is a violation, then i warn for that violation. So, when you see me telling someone to toughen up, etc., there was not a violation of our rules.

Not every mention / description of someone will be a violation. More than just a specific word said, goes into whether a violation is issued. Some folk have tougher skin than others, and what might actually be a violation, can be overlooked because the Members involved can handle the exchange positively. For example, i call Sister Honey1201 ... Honey Chile ... now ... if we weren't comfortable enough with each other ... she might take offense at my doing that ... report me ... and i'd be warned to only call her by the name she registered with.

That's why we have this policy ... You Want Consistency in our Management - Here It Is.

There are often so many particulars, so many bigger picture stories being played out in the forest floor skirmishes, that managing it all can be quite daunting ... and the last thing we need is to have to mediate failed engagements of adults, and satisfy every Member with our resolution ... it's just way too much ... so we have a policy giving all to know that we will not do that.

In this thread for example, i know the Brothers have been riding Brother Perfection. I don't understand it. I don't see any violations on his part, yet yall are on him ... so i'm watching ... for it's my job to insure that each Member gets what we have to give ... and that is a peaceful, respectful community in which to engage.

I don't see all the violations, that's for sure, so please report any you see ... for mentioning them only when you get warned ... makes them not count quite as much in my book.

Love You!

:heart:

Destee


Wow!

"13 warning posts". Really? It seems as if at least 10 of those posts were in response to a concern that I raised concerning a possible violation.

And I believe I stopped posting here but I have been reading the posts of others and it seems a double standard taking place.

I know I have raised concerns about some including the author of this thread referring to me as a liar and a hypocrite, and have been told there is no violation but yet, if some make the same comment concerning this poster they are told its a violation.

In regards to the dirtbag broad comment, in that same thread you just posted numerous times, he threw that at me even though I never used such language, then he uses the same language in regards to a sister after she is banned. Wow! I would not even have responded here but am doing so since what. He use your posts to me from Feb. as evidence of "disruption" in this thread, when even here I asked a few questions which never were answered, answered a few questions of which he objected, even though they were direct questions, which were net with threats to dismantle me. smh.

I have been here long enough to know how this works so...
 

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