Black Relationships : Your man looking at other women and flirting...how do you feel?

Keita Kenyatta

going above and beyond
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Feb 7, 2004
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I know--but you know--I was just singing. Heck, I think that she was singing a song too.

You know--you're on a date--then a song comes into your head.

Or a song was in your head way back--but you're like--can't sing now--then you do sing . . ..

I mean--I wasn't singing about the girl in front of me. It was 'bad timing;' but let's be forreal. When did we ever have 'good timing?'
Time and experience will allow you to develop it, believe me!!:thinking:
 

Asomfwaa

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Nov 16, 2011
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:lol: that's what i'm talking about, some men have to strike up a conversation with the cashier or whoever cant you just get your **** change and get the hell out the store! meanwhile us ladies know some women think your man wants them and that you're not enough for him. they see him looking at them and they give you that look.
But you know "The bees come to the honey."

When a Black man is with a good Black woman--Black women want that man. And only then!

Everyone knows that if you are walking pass a Sister, you're invisible.

But if you're with a woman--ANY WOMAN--Your Mom too--you're more important than the stop sign.

Shaking my head.

That's why we need a communal ritual where women can look at single men--so I don't have to vent about street treatment.
 

Asomfwaa

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Nov 16, 2011
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Though that is an overt example, it has always gone on, on both sides. It doesnt stop just because you found somone you like. I come home every night and spend all my time and money with you. Are you that needy and insecure? If Halle walks in the room and I dont stare, you really should think I'm "metrosexual". lol


..
I don't really think so. I would be more like "That's Halle Berry," instead of "Here's your divorce papers."

Sometimes I see Sisters who wow me physically and mentally. Halle Berry doesn't do that for me--so I won't trade her at all.
 

Keita Kenyatta

going above and beyond
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Feb 7, 2004
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I just wanted to know people women have a natural jealousy in them they say but how do you feel if your man is always noticing other women, checking out their goods, smiling at women and just being "the nice guy" instead of just keeping it moving.

I was watching a movie and a guy said im married but im not blind and I thought ok, you know, but is there anything wrong with making your woman or wife feel like the center of your attention when you're with her. How would you feel ,men, if you caught your woman always making eye contact with other good looking attractive men and checking out their packages while she's walking with you? I don't think guys would like that and they call it being friendly. I don't do that, i'm not friendly with men I don't know all they may get is a hi in return and that's it. I won't engage them in casual conversation, I always have respect for my husband or anyone i've ever been with because most of the time that is how men initiate their expression of interest and they don't care if you're taken or not. Why should I be swaping glances or checking some brother out when Im with someone and satisfied. I do notice good looking guys often but there is a difference in noticing and gazing and trading glances.

How do the guys and gals feel about this?
look don't personally attack me im just asking for honest opinions about how YOU feel not my expressions. i'll take constructive criticism, hold the sarcasm and smart remarks please ;)
You have a point...and the younger the brother is, the worse it is. A sister could just speak with a bother and the brother be like; Yo dog, she big on me, when all she was doing was speaking. The one great lesson that I learned in life is that; "it's very rare that what you see on the outside that is a reflection of what's on the inside". This means that the average brother has to learn to dismiss the package immediately and begin looking for the same inner light or beauty inside of her that he sees outside.
 

Keita Kenyatta

going above and beyond
PREMIUM MEMBER
Feb 7, 2004
5,636
3,333
I just wanted to know people women have a natural jealousy in them they say but how do you feel if your man is always noticing other women, checking out their goods, smiling at women and just being "the nice guy" instead of just keeping it moving.

I was watching a movie and a guy said im married but im not blind and I thought ok, you know, but is there anything wrong with making your woman or wife feel like the center of your attention when you're with her. How would you feel ,men, if you caught your woman always making eye contact with other good looking attractive men and checking out their packages while she's walking with you? I don't think guys would like that and they call it being friendly. I don't do that, i'm not friendly with men I don't know all they may get is a hi in return and that's it. I won't engage them in casual conversation, I always have respect for my husband or anyone i've ever been with because most of the time that is how men initiate their expression of interest and they don't care if you're taken or not. Why should I be swaping glances or checking some brother out when Im with someone and satisfied. I do notice good looking guys often but there is a difference in noticing and gazing and trading glances.

How do the guys and gals feel about this?
look don't personally attack me im just asking for honest opinions about how YOU feel not my expressions. i'll take constructive criticism, hold the sarcasm and smart remarks please ;)
You have a point...and the younger the brother is, the worse it is. A sister could just speak with a bother and the brother be like; Yo dog, she big on me, when all she was doing was speaking. The one great lesson that I learned in life is that; "it's very rare that what you see on the outside that is a reflection of what's on the inside". This means that the average brother has to learn to dismiss the package immediately and begin looking for the same inner light or beauty inside of her that he sees outside.
 

Asomfwaa

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MEMBER
Nov 16, 2011
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If that's going on, then that ain't your man. If you allow it, you ain't his woman. That's right, I'm keeping it real again!!! Been there, done that!!...and that only means that the relationship started off wrong, does not have the needed value system that a relationship needs to grow and lacks the moral foundation that goes BEYOND THE PHYSICAL. Don't get it wrong, men and women are going to look because that's a natural part of who and how we are as humans...however, when I'm walking the streets with my Queen, nothing else exist period. As soon as I discovered (yes, life is full of discoveries) that nothing else existed when I was walking with her, it was easy for me to understand that nothing else existed when I wasn't walking with her....therefore I grew some more with that understanding.
Hotep!

I feel this.

This is what Black folk need: Hope!

It's these hopeful stories that make continuing necessary!

Thanks--I'm going to see how I can spread this concept amongst our people.

HTP
 

Asomfwaa

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Nov 16, 2011
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How can women or men fix this problem and try to keep "black love" and not leave their man/woman because he/she cannot control his gaze. How can we help them understand without damaging the relationship, can this be resolved? Some men are too friendly and some women are also so does anyone have any suggestions on how to start to fix this problem keeping in mind the silly tiresome idealism people have now-a-day such as, "I'm a man!" and "What you think, I'm gay!", or "I'm not sleeping with him!"
I think that African folk should embrace this lesson:

“Love shall come to complete you; first know then be yourself.”
 

Black-king

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Sep 13, 2011
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I know--but you know--I was just singing. Heck, I think that she was singing a song too.

You know--you're on a date--then a song comes into your head.

Or a song was in your head way back--but you're like--can't sing now--then you do sing . . ..

I mean--I wasn't singing about the girl in front of me. It was 'bad timing;' but let's be forreal. When did we ever have 'good timing?'
I know what you mean, it just so happen when you start singing the girl shows up, now the question usually goes do I keep on singing or should I stop? either way its bad.:lol: You are right, the timing is never good.
 

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