Black Relationships : You Got a STD - Who's Fault Is It?

You Got a STD - Who's Fault Is It?

  • Mine

    Votes: 6 27.3%
  • Theirs

    Votes: 3 13.6%
  • Both

    Votes: 11 50.0%
  • Blame it on everyone ...

    Votes: 1 4.5%
  • Blame it on the rain ...

    Votes: 1 4.5%

  • Total voters
    22

Destee

destee.com
STAFF
Jan 22, 2001
35,786
9,625
betwixt and between
destee.com
Occupation
Website Consultant
Hello Family,

I'm a firm believer that we are responsible for the choices we make, and all possible consequences that could come, as a result of those choices. This includes contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

While i'd be quite upset, to say the least, if i contracted some STD from someone ... it would be very difficult for me to see past my own decision of laying down with this person ... making the choice ... allowing the situation to exist ... deciding to open myself up to this risk ... it would be very difficult for me to see past these things, to look at the other person's culpability in the situation.

I had full and complete control and responsibility ... for the health and well-being of my body ... and willingly relinquished it.

If i had never made the decision, to lay with them, none of this would be happening.

I'm talking consenting adults here.

What do you all think?

If you get a STD ... who's fault is it ... yours or theirs?

:heart:

Destee
 

Destee

destee.com
STAFF
Jan 22, 2001
35,786
9,625
betwixt and between
destee.com
Occupation
Website Consultant
lol Brother James ... it wasn't me! :)

i added an option in the poll ... just for you Brother James! :love:

:heart:

Destee
 

1hotvirgowoman

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Oct 25, 2004
1,168
6
Well now, I would have to say that it is both of our faults.

Mines: Because I had unprotected sex( if in fact I did).

Theirs: If they didn't tell me that they had an STD to begin with.
 

Destee

destee.com
STAFF
Jan 22, 2001
35,786
9,625
betwixt and between
destee.com
Occupation
Website Consultant
1hotvirgowoman said:
Well now, I would have to say that it is both of our faults.

Mines: Because I had unprotected sex( if in fact I did).

Theirs: If they didn't tell me that they had an STD to begin with.
Sister 1HotVirgoWoman ... what if he didn't know ... then would it be your fault alone?

And what if the condom broke ... would it be your fault then?

Do condoms provide a 100% guarantee against the transmission of STD's?

:heart:

Destee
 

panafrica

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Aug 24, 2002
10,227
191
The Diaspora
The only way a person can be held blameless for contracting an STD is if they were married & faithful to their partner. In this case, a person can reasonably assume that their spouse is also being faithful. Although this is not always true (thus the transmission of STDs within marriages), it is again reasonable to expect it.

In all other cases, people are directly responsible for their sexual behavior! One can not & should not depend on someone else to prevent them from getting an STD.
 

1hotvirgowoman

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Oct 25, 2004
1,168
6
Destee said:
Sister 1HotVirgoWoman ... what if he didn't know ... then would it be your fault alone?

And what if the condom broke ... would it be your fault then?

Do condoms provide a 100% guarantee against the transmission of STD's?

:heart:

Destee


Good question Destee.

1)If he didn't know then Yes, it is my fault for assuming that he was STD free. But, the "Fault" is not completely mine for, he should have got himself checked. But 90% of the blame is on me.

2)YUP- it's definately my fault!. I took a chance to begin with. I was aware of his STD but decided to have sex with him anyway- I am to blame!.

3)Nope- only 99%. I read the label(grinning proudly)
 

CarrieMonet

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Dec 26, 2003
1,244
14
Seattle
Occupation
Love my job!
Destee said:
Hello Family,

I'm a firm believer that we are responsible for the choices we make, and all possible consequences that could come, as a result of those choices. This includes contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

While i'd be quite upset, to say the least, if i contracted some STD from someone ... it would be very difficult for me to see past my own decision of laying down with this person ... making the choice ... allowing the situation to exist ... deciding to open myself up to this risk ... it would be very difficult for me to see past these things, to look at the other person's culpability in the situation.

I had full and complete control and responsibility ... for the health and well-being of my body ... and willingly relinquished it.

If i had never made the decision, to lay with them, none of this would be happening.

I'm talking consenting adults here.

What do you all think?

If you get a STD ... who's fault is it ... yours or theirs?

:heart:

Destee
My good friend got one from her husband after 6 years of marriage. You can't judge someone because they have an STD if you don't know how they acquired it. Now she is punished for having it...and if she leaves him, I'm sure society will think she is the one to blame - and she'll have to explain it to her future partners - so she tries to stay in a dead end marriage. Funny thing is, they had "tests" done before they married and this is where they ended up. I would not take the blame in that situation...

Most people who come to the ER here claim they got it from a long term partner...and yes they could still use protection but most of them don't when they think they are the only one.
 

CarrieMonet

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Dec 26, 2003
1,244
14
Seattle
Occupation
Love my job!
On another note...
For the record, diseases like Herpes can lie dormant for years and can only be found through blood tests if the carrier has had no sypmtoms...therefore it's something that can easily be passed on by a spouse who has not been unfaithful. Many people fail to get blood tests for herpes...they only test for HIV antibodies.
 

Nisa

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Jul 25, 2004
1,512
31
MICHIGAN
Nothing is 100 percent at all. Condoms slip off,break. Get Tested..every 6 months. Limit number of partners. Alot of STDs are asymptomatic..meaning they show no symptoms. Some think they need to be itching, have sores or have painful urination to have an std..not true.
 

Consciousness Raising Online!

Allow the N Word - yes or no?

  • yes

    Votes: 2 14.3%
  • no

    Votes: 6 42.9%
  • not sure

    Votes: 6 42.9%

Latest profile posts

Feeling good today fam...just been reading a couple of books. I think Dennis Kimbro's "Daily Motivations for African American Success" is one of the best motivational books on the market. This book has motivation for each day of the year on each page and all of these relate to your own Blackness. No matter what you're experiencing there's something in that book you could draw from. ✊
Life is a poem, love is the pen.
Charles Thompson wrote on Enki's profile.
Good evening
Destee wrote on Angela22's profile.
Hi Sweetie Pie Honey Bunch!!!! ... :dance4: ... Welcome Home! So good to have your sweet Spirit in the house! ... YAAAAAAY USSSSS! ... :yaay: :yaay: :swings: ... :heart:
Angela22 wrote on Enki's profile.
I hope all is well with you. Much love.:love:
Top