Black Relationships : You Got a STD - Who's Fault Is It?

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Destee, Apr 12, 2005.

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You Got a STD - Who's Fault Is It?

  1. Mine

    6 vote(s)
    27.3%
  2. Theirs

    3 vote(s)
    13.6%
  3. Both

    11 vote(s)
    50.0%
  4. Blame it on everyone ...

    1 vote(s)
    4.5%
  5. Blame it on the rain ...

    1 vote(s)
    4.5%
  1. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Hello Family,

    I'm a firm believer that we are responsible for the choices we make, and all possible consequences that could come, as a result of those choices. This includes contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

    While i'd be quite upset, to say the least, if i contracted some STD from someone ... it would be very difficult for me to see past my own decision of laying down with this person ... making the choice ... allowing the situation to exist ... deciding to open myself up to this risk ... it would be very difficult for me to see past these things, to look at the other person's culpability in the situation.

    I had full and complete control and responsibility ... for the health and well-being of my body ... and willingly relinquished it.

    If i had never made the decision, to lay with them, none of this would be happening.

    I'm talking consenting adults here.

    What do you all think?

    If you get a STD ... who's fault is it ... yours or theirs?

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  2. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    if i get one, I'm blaming every body :flamet:
     
  3. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    lol Brother James ... it wasn't me! :)

    i added an option in the poll ... just for you Brother James! :love:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  4. 1hotvirgowoman

    1hotvirgowoman Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Well now, I would have to say that it is both of our faults.

    Mines: Because I had unprotected sex( if in fact I did).

    Theirs: If they didn't tell me that they had an STD to begin with.
     
  5. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Sister 1HotVirgoWoman ... what if he didn't know ... then would it be your fault alone?

    And what if the condom broke ... would it be your fault then?

    Do condoms provide a 100% guarantee against the transmission of STD's?

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  6. panafrica

    panafrica Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    The only way a person can be held blameless for contracting an STD is if they were married & faithful to their partner. In this case, a person can reasonably assume that their spouse is also being faithful. Although this is not always true (thus the transmission of STDs within marriages), it is again reasonable to expect it.

    In all other cases, people are directly responsible for their sexual behavior! One can not & should not depend on someone else to prevent them from getting an STD.
     
  7. 1hotvirgowoman

    1hotvirgowoman Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Good question Destee.

    1)If he didn't know then Yes, it is my fault for assuming that he was STD free. But, the "Fault" is not completely mine for, he should have got himself checked. But 90% of the blame is on me.

    2)YUP- it's definately my fault!. I took a chance to begin with. I was aware of his STD but decided to have sex with him anyway- I am to blame!.

    3)Nope- only 99%. I read the label(grinning proudly)
     
  8. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    My good friend got one from her husband after 6 years of marriage. You can't judge someone because they have an STD if you don't know how they acquired it. Now she is punished for having it...and if she leaves him, I'm sure society will think she is the one to blame - and she'll have to explain it to her future partners - so she tries to stay in a dead end marriage. Funny thing is, they had "tests" done before they married and this is where they ended up. I would not take the blame in that situation...

    Most people who come to the ER here claim they got it from a long term partner...and yes they could still use protection but most of them don't when they think they are the only one.
     
  9. CarrieMonet

    CarrieMonet Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    On another note...
    For the record, diseases like Herpes can lie dormant for years and can only be found through blood tests if the carrier has had no sypmtoms...therefore it's something that can easily be passed on by a spouse who has not been unfaithful. Many people fail to get blood tests for herpes...they only test for HIV antibodies.
     
  10. Nisa

    Nisa Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Nothing is 100 percent at all. Condoms slip off,break. Get Tested..every 6 months. Limit number of partners. Alot of STDs are asymptomatic..meaning they show no symptoms. Some think they need to be itching, have sores or have painful urination to have an std..not true.
     
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