Black Women : Woman, Teach Thy Sister!

Mike Ramey

Well-Known Member
Jul 26, 2002

The numbers are staggering, and are showing little sign of letting up. More and more teenage girls being sent to juvenile hall, reform school, and on to prison. The rising number of teenage girls involved in street gangs--not just as followers, but as leaders. In hallways of many schools, teenage girls are engaging in much of the same behavior detested in teenage boys--cussing, fussing, fighting, and packing guns and knives.
As a matter of fact, the day after I wrote this column, a fifteen year old girl was arrested at a local high school and taken to juvenile hall for being found with a loaded .22 semi-automatic in her purse.
For many a year, the feminists and their allies in the mainstream press have been eagerly browbeating us men, telling us what ‘we need to do’ with young men. And, brothers, it took us a while to get the message, but we have done the job.
Well, let me be the first to put the shoe on the other foot, and go public with my words: ‘It’s high time that WOMEN get these TEENAGE GIRLS under control!’ In short, it’s time for women to roll up their sleeves, pull down the hemlines, cover up the over-exposure of flesh, and get back to teaching young women how to become women of quality, rather than someone’s rap video plaything.

Brothers, just as it takes a man to teach a boy how to become a man, it takes a woman to teach a girl how to become a woman. The problem in our modern day is that there are far too many women who are more interested in competing with their daughters for the available men that are out in society, rather than being content with the husband that they do have. Can I get an AMEN from the husbands in the house?
Let’s head on down the course a little further. Without proper training from Godly women, young women are heading down a slippery slope. There are many male teachers--young and old--who have been propositioned by girls as young as ten or eleven years old! The favorite question of these young ‘wannabe’ temptresses in many a classroom is not; ‘What’s tonight’s homework assignment,’ but rather; ‘Are you married?’
No wonder there is a shortage of men in the middle and high school teaching ranks. What male teacher wants to be ‘set up’ because of a scorned eleven year old?
But that’s not all. I’ve heard through the ‘underground grapevine’ that, if a teenage boy ‘rejects’ or ‘won’t talk to’ a teenage girl who is interested in him--thanks to our PC society and school environment--the teenage girl will run to the Dean of Students and ACCUSE HIM OF SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!
You may think that I am pulling your leg on this one, but trust me--I have already seen it happen in my home city. It may be coming to a city near you--and your son may be the target. Even if you get the culprit to ‘fess up’, your son’s academic record may be in ruins...unless you have the bank to get a lawyer to clean up such a mess.

Remember when Grandmas used to be in their fifties and sixties? I have noticed that there are women in their mid-thirties who are grandmothers!
And, they are not above hitting the strip to have a little fun. May/December romances are not a thing of the past, nor of social gossip, anymore. Just turn on any TV Talk show, and you can see the host or hostess giving their ‘tips’ on how Granny can ‘shake them hips’.
With the weather turning warmer, the skirts getting shorter, and modesty becoming non-existent, women--who have come from families that should have taught them better-- there are ‘Grandmas’ out there trying to ‘get their roll on’, just like their daughters--and in some cases, granddaughters!
Like I said brothers, this is not a man problem. This is a woman problem. And, for you sisters who read my column on a regular basis (and show it to your man), this one is for YOU. Woman, teach thy sister! Her life, and the life of your relationship may depend upon it, when she shows up on your doorstep and tries to ruin your relationship.
Sisters, the relationship you could save, by helping teenage girls to become young women of quality, may be your own. You can’t watch another’s house burn, without some hot ashes heading your way. It’s not ‘someone else’s problem’, but YOURS.

The biblical mandate is clear, and is found in the New Testament. It is up to older men to train younger men, and the older women to train younger women. The reason for such an order-setting pattern is simple: there are just some topics which are meant to be shared between women, and some topics meant to be shared between men. In other words; men have been ordained to provide for the home, yet women have been ordained to make a home worthy of provision.
In the Book of Ruth, Naomi--the older woman--take the time to educate, or ‘hip’ Ruth--the younger woman--in the ways of womanhood. Naomi, while disappointed with the initial outcome of her life, because of circumstances, reversals, and downturns, still found the time to put away her crying towel to do what she was created to do; help an unsure, awkward, young girl to become a mature woman who would be a blessing to society, rather than a curse.
In my humble opinion, there are far too many older women in the ‘blaming’ game, rather than getting involved in the ‘training’ game. Our streets are full of young women who know more about Wall Street than how to help the family down her street. As one businessman once told me: ‘We have an abundance of educated fools; men who are smart and won’t provide; women who are smart, and won’t receive.’
Eventually, Naomi trained Ruth to such a point that Ruth went solo, and landed the man of her dreams, Boaz--a mighty man of wealth. Naomi trained Ruth to know the difference between the ‘punks, skunks, and drunks’, and she--the little foreign girl who was hated by the insiders, wound up married to the wealthiest man in town! As a bonus, Ruth and Boaz were firmly imbedded into the bloodline of Jesus Christ--all because Naomi stopped thinking about her past, and reached forward to a better future by helping someone--a young woman--in need!

When an older woman helps to shape the life of a younger woman, she could impact the destiny of an entire nation of people! Harriet Tubman, Phyllis Wheatley, Sojourner Truth, and other sisters from our past were raised on God and the Church! Their courage inspired dozens, if not hundreds of women, and supported untold dozens of men. When we look at THEIR exploits in history, there is not a modern woman who can hold a candle to them! What modern innovation compares to the Underground Railroad?
Yes, these were real, flesh and blood women. However, when the going got rough, they didn’t ‘opt out’ for a seminar on self-esteem. They remembered how they were ‘raised up’ by other women, and faced the day at hand, working as a team with the men around them!
If only many of the modern women of today had such courage!
But, I digress.
Brothers, we need to encourage our women to get back to the basics. Not in a harsh way, but in a truthful manner. Let us stick with those brothers who need help, but refer our ‘younger sisters’ to those women in our communities who have a track record of sobriety, modesty, and maturity. They exist. They are as close as the Mother’s Board of your local church, or, within the confines of your local home. Quality women--just like quality men--don’t just happen. Someone has taken the time to get involved with them and helped them see that they don’t have to be a statistic, but they can be an inspiration.

Mike Ramey is the author of ‘The Manhood Line’, a monthly, syndicated column written for men, from a biblical, business, and common-sense perspective. To email, drop a note to (C) 2001 Mike Ramey/Barnstorm Communications International (11).


Well-Known Member
May 23, 2001
I am glad that you are not moved by the number of people reading you, cuz I would hate to see you leave, thinking that you were not helping by sharing the wisdom that has so obviously been bestowed upon you. Mike, you are a Godsend to this forum. Keep sharing, so that I may keep getting blessed. Thanks also, for visiting my website. I glad you were blessed.

Your sistah in Christ,


Mike Ramey

Well-Known Member
Jul 26, 2002
Joyce, You Are On Target As Well...

I pray that MORE people discover your works as well! Lots of GREAT poetry over at your place as well.

Brothers, we need to encourage women of quality when we DO see them, and their works! Destee is one! Delores is one! Joyce is one!

The ranks of Queen Vashti are shrinking, and the ranks of Queen Esther are swelling! It's nice to know that both the brotherhood and the sisterhood are teaching each other what constitutes quality in character and conduct!

Thanks Joyce, You MADE my day!

Mike Ramey



Well-Known Member
Jul 25, 2004
Thanks..this came just in time for part of my help my sisters...


Well-Known Member
Aug 19, 2004
I agree with you in so far as women should mentor other women and girls.

My question to you is what you mean by a woman of quality. I am particularly averse to your suggestion that a quality man is a good provider and a quality woman is a good receiver (i'm paraphrasing of course). I don't know why (or where) it is written in stone (and by whom) that a man is to provide for a home and a woman to make it worthy of provision. Assuming this is indeed the case...and on that does one mentor a girl...on what? Being a good recepient? This all seems very vague to me. Is the reward of woman a rich husband who will provide for her? Is that it? Is there more? Is this what women should aspire to? I understand that your background is biblical (my questioning is not)...I just need further explanation.

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