Black Women : why white beauty standard affects bw more than bm

Discussion in 'Black Women - Mothers - Sisters - Daughters' started by napturaltwistie, Aug 11, 2003.

  1. napturaltwistie

    napturaltwistie Active Member MEMBER

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    I was on mindkandys interracial debate, and i ran across this thread created by a white man asking why are women obsessed with wanting blonde hair, he claimed he didn't particularly like blonde hair, but he was asking the women why they were obsessed with lightening their hair. Here is the respnse 1 white woman gave, she was basically saying that in every culture white skin and blonde hair represent the essence of femininity and that dark skin represents masculinity.

    here is the link to what she was saying if you want to read it.

    http://pub45.ezboard.com/fmindkandy...essageRange?topicID=78.topic&start=21&stop=25

    After reading what she wrote, she reiterated a lot of what i had been wondering about all along, eventhough i didn't agree with her conclusion that it's natural for men to want light skin and women to want dark skin, it made me think of my life experiences and the experience man black women go through no matter if they are dark or light, they are still held to the same euro-standard of beauty.

    Have you all ever noticed that if a woman is dark skinned, she is ridiculed for it, but if a man is dark skinned he is glamourized? Also, if a woman wears her hair natural, some people will look at her like she is crazy but men wear their hair natural all the time without getting a second glance. most people say it's because of european colonialism and domination, while i agree with this, i would like to know why the double standard when it comes to men and women?


    This is crazy to me given our pre-colonial history. During pre-colonial history, whiteness and blonde hair weren't always associated with femininity, As a matter of fact, check out this article, it has many quotes on how during pre-colonial times in many places (china, southeast asia,rome, the philppines) black hair, the darkest eyes and dark skin were preferred on both men AND women.


    http://www.colorq.org/Articles/1999/blackwhite.htm

    japan was a different story. In japan white skin, black eyes and black hair were preferred for both men AND women. So this idea that dark skin=masculinity and light skin=femininity has been around since the beginning of time is completely false because in some cultures white skin was preferred for both men and women and in others black skin was preferred for both men and women. Now, the worshipping of blonde hair in MOST cultures is VERY recent. Most cultures before colonialism preferred black hair on men and women. All of this didn’t happen until European colonialism was introduced.

    Below is an article on japans preference for white skin and the darkest of black hair on both men and women. Keep in mind also in SOME parts of India, light skin was preferred, while in other parts of India darker skin was preferred before colonialism. Also keep in mind that Ibn buttua, the guy mentioned in both of these articles traveled to mali(walata) toward the END of his journey. The article also explains how the obsession with blonde hair got started.

    http://www.colorq.org/Articles/2002/colorism.htm


    Also, here is another link to the quote from an early European explorer on how the people of the congo preferred dark skin on both the men and the women.

    http://www.coribe.org/Pages/ISylvia.html

    The wooden mask shown in the link below is evidence that in some african tribes the darkest skin represents the essence of female beauty and moral purity. this is the complete opposite of western culture where whitness represents femininity and purity. read the quote below, then visit the link that this quote comes from. You can also view the masks in the link below.

    http://www.montana.edu/cybertour/art/6to12/haugens/


    So, the standard of beauty changes according to the people in power.

    So i am asking you all, why do you think the double standard all of a sudden when it comes to men and women? This double standard didn't exist before colonialism, so why does it exist today?






    peace
     
  2. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Napturaltwistie ... Welcome again! We have rules against adding content that belongs to others without their permission (see my signature below). Please edit your post, removing the words that aren't yours, perhaps you can paraphrase for us, leaving links to the forums where the property can be found.

    Of course it is okay to mention the works of others to help make your point, but please do so sparingly as we want to always respect property that belongs to others. Thanks.

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  3. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Napturaltwistie ... stop posting this same thread in other forums ... you're giving me more work to do because i have to now delete them ... also ... quit posting property that belongs to others without including their permission ... you almost got me want'n ta ban you ... take a moment and read our rules, please.

    Destee
     
  4. napturaltwistie

    napturaltwistie Active Member MEMBER

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    I apologize Destee. It won't happen again. Don't worry i will edit everything.

    peace
     
  5. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    Napturaltwistie ... thanks for the apology, all is well Sister. Your topic is a good one and we'd like to know your thoughts regarding it, not necessarily those of others. If you must include their words, use a sentence or two and link to where we can go and read them in their entirety. Otherwise, you must include their permission for their words to be posted here. Just because someone posts their words on one site, it doesn't mean they want them on every (this) site.

    It's your words and thoughts we are most interested in :wink:

    :heart:

    Destee
     
  6. napturaltwistie

    napturaltwistie Active Member MEMBER

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    peace:heart:

    I think the reason the double standard exists is because of the way men and women are socialized into society. Before the feminist movements in the 60s,for a long time it wasn't seen as acceptable for a woman to be educated, or as educated as her husband and she SURE wasn't suppose to be the breadwinner in the family.So, women had very few choices then, and they were in the postion where her looks were her only source of power. The better she looked the better her chances were to find a financially stable man. She had no true power, her only power came from men. This is why women have always been more obsessed with their looks than men. Since white was and still is the beauty standard in america, it affects women more than it affects men. There have also been studies ran that show that men choose women based on their looks more often than women choose men based on looks. Women are more likely to go for money while men are more likely to go for looks. This double standard doesn't only exist in the black community. Whites have colonized the entire globe, so every cmminity is affected by this beauty standard. And you will find that in areas that were colonized by whites or that were white dominated, this double standard exists. this double standard exists in asia, latin america and CERTAIN PARTS of africa as well.



    peace
     
  7. NNQueen

    NNQueen going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Simple?

    What do I think is going on with the issues you raise? As I think about the title of this thread, two words come to my mind:

    Racism and Sexism

    For people who try to change their looks to adopt the features and characteristics of someone else's standard of beauty?

    Self-genocide
     
  8. yaphet al-wynn

    yaphet al-wynn Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hey, Twistie-that you? Welcome. Can't speak for other Black men, but Eureopean standards for Black women don't apply to me. Maybe when I WAS younger but not now. For all of you out there the first crush I ever had was on a VERY pretty darkskinned girl in the first grade. Yeah, I do like light skinned women. Just like Black women-period. Very vexing but intriguing.
     
  9. Pharaoh Jahil

    Pharaoh Jahil Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Co-sign with yaphet. I don't have that problem. When I was younger or deaf, dumb and blind. I was only into lightskin sistas but when I came into knowledge of self. I found darkskin sistas catching my attention alot lol.... Light, Brown, Dark....I love black women period. All black women are beautiful.

    Oh and as for the natural look, I think all black women should wear their hair natural but hey that's just me. ;)
     
  10. Deepa

    Deepa Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    They say:

    Yo booty too big.

    Yo hair is too nappy.

    Yo lips are too big.

    Yo hips are too wide.

    Yo hair is too short.

    Yo weave is too long.

    Yo nose is too big.

    Yo skin to dark.

    Yo body too muscular.

    Yo thighs too thick.

    I say:

    Thank you for letting me know I'm more beautiful than you can handle.
     
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