Black People : Why do we stress over those who don’t care about us?

a question i ask daily to my self and others
yet haven't got a sound answer ....stress over what care less of me
is not a worry for me , i stress about what i care for and who!
surely not a white man nor who dating who , rejection been my most
inner power that makes me stronger and get after what i want more

sometime it all because how one was mislead and told yet give no reason
to stress self ......The number one sniper to black folks mind (stress)
Hi Brother Pan ... i believe it's because we've been conditioned to seek the approval of those who will never value us. This is the legacy of slavery and after hundreds of years of living this way ... hoping massa would count us properly ... be pleased with our actions, thoughts, etc. ... many of us still yearn for that.

In many cases, if you don't please the powers that be, you won't work, you won't advance, you won't experience even a semblance of the successes you see them enjoying. It is by design, it is no coincidence.

During Brother OldSoul's class this past Sunday, we talked about the "magical negro" ... how most every major Black actor in Hollywood, if they've wanted success, have had to play the "magical negro" role. The role where they have some magic power, power used to help and save the White person ... oftentimes sacrificing their own life for them in the process. As we discussed this, we were hard-pressed to think of any Black actors that have reached any level of "success" in Hollywood, that has not had to play this role. Another role that Brother OldSoul mentioned, was where Black male actors must eventually put on a dress, play the role of a woman, if he is to go on and experience the greater successes in that arena. Of course this also applies to the Black female who wants success, she must bare her body and lay with a White man. This is the media, it presents the archetype (the original) by which the rest of us base our lives on, whether consciously or subconsciosly. Do what we say, please us, or you will not be accepted, you will not be successful.

This "black women with white men" ... or "black men with white women" ... or any of the other virtually trivial arguments we get into with each other ... is just a small manifestation of the bigger picture, in my opinion. The fact that we spend so much time fighting with each other over these topics, is just a sign of how damaged we are and how much healing we need.

Fortunately many of us aware of this conditioning that has and is taking place, and acting accordingly. Hopefully we can be patient with the rest of our Sisters and Brothers, as they too come into the knowledge of their own selves and aware of what is being done to us all. If we can't be patient with our Sisters and Brothers who may not be as aware as we are, then we too are still being greatly influenced by this conditioning, it's just manifesting itself in a different way.

The assault and devastation they put on us as a people, effects us in so many different ways, we really must learn to be consious of them all, in order to overcome them.


I agree with you Sister Des. Issues of "race" are prevalent all around us such that we can't physically escape the images of it so we constantly focus our attention on it and feel the need to discuss it often when we come here--be it positive or negative.

Brother Pan, I could be misreading your question, but do I sense some frustration in it? I'm starting to get the impression that some of us want to see a different type of discussion taking place here. Am I correct? As I reflect on the recent thread that Brother Manasiac started when he asked why does race have to enter discussions where there seems to be no relevance and now yours.

What should the focus of our discussions be?

Queenie :spinstar:


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