Black Men : Why did He leave Her?

Discussion in 'Black Men - Fathers - Brothers - Sons' started by river, May 13, 2010.

  1. river

    river Watch Her Flow MEMBER

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    Hey Brothas,

    I know I am fifty million years late on this. I just finished listening to an audio recording of Waiting to Exhale. One of the characters, Savannah, goes on a business trip where she meets this guy and they hit it off. He is everything: intelligent, a gentleman, thoughtful, humorous, has goals, all that stuff a woman puts on her hit list.

    Ah man why did Aretha come on singing Till You Come Back To Me right now. Why did you have to decide you had to set me free? Oh brother.

    Anyway, my girl says a few things that he doesn't make a big deal out of like the fact that she smokes . He mildly hints that he might have a problem with these things but the hint doesn't register on her. She has sex with him the very first day they met.

    They go home. She waits for him to call. After a few days without a word from him she calls him and leaves a message. This is where I scream at her "No, stupid. Don't do that." She leaves a neutral, nonchalant message on his machine. Nothing that would make her sound desperate. But he doesn't return her call.

    Why? Was it the part about her smoking and stuff? Do men pay attention and make decisions based on things that women just let slide? Was it that she had sex with him? All of the above?
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    wow.....it could have been all above and it could have been his way
    of reacting to her knowing it wouldn't work
     
  3. medusanegrita

    medusanegrita Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Just because you had a nice time and YOU think you hit it off doesn't mean it's worth another a date - and that could be for any number of reasons.

    - maybe he knew she was looking for something more substantial and he wasn't (a likely thing)

    - maybe he really doesn't like smokers. Smokers stink up everything and some them even like to french kiss. Not good. All others things considering and good, compromising on a smoker would be a BIG compromise to me. I don't like smoking or smokers.

    - if he has this attitude, he could think she gave it up too easily, and I'm prone to hearing - men like a chase or challenge :rolleyes:

    - maybe he was filtering her through his wants and diswants, and he didn't like her little idiosyncrasies.


    Men might appear easy to please, and many of them are - but many are set in their ways or know more than exactly what they want... just like women. If you think you are all that and a bad a chips... well confidence is good, but that doesn't mean every man you want will want you and vice versa. It doesn't mean anything is wrong with either of you, you both could be great people but one just wasn't that interested beyond the first date. That's all. Reasons are as numerous as the people who have them. If you believe in soul mates, then he probably wasn't your 'soul mate' if he didn't feel a mutual chemistry enough to keep it going.... regarding of how great you think he is.

    I know you want a man's opinion, by why is so hard to think like a man or just on a general tip?

    Savannah (or women in general) could take it personal or not, but she would do better spending her time on having fun and going to the next man. I wouldn't mope over a man for more than a day or so who didn't call. Just think he wasn't interested for whatever reason and go one to the next.
     
  4. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    she a jump off

    he is just not that into her......
     
  5. Amnat77

    Amnat77 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Its sex the thing, she made it too easy. I wouldn't have called him though, and if he called I would have pretended as if had forgotten all about him, but thats just me:10500:
     
  6. Amnat77

    Amnat77 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    opps question was for the guys, sorry..lol.
     
  7. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    she stink......

    it was not the sex. if she smoke she smell bad. he not that into her.
     
  8. medusanegrita

    medusanegrita Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Why do people continue to say this? If she was horny and wanted him, she has just as right to sex as he does if they both consent and want to do it.

    But SHE made it easy? What about him? He had no problem giving up his dingy and making that to easy. Theses double standards just urk the HELL out of me. Women don't like them, but they still support them to the hilt.


    The problem comes when women who subscribe to these double standards SET THEMSELVES UP by giving up the poontang and thinking it should lead to something. No sweetheart, you just got SEXED! That's it. I hope it was worth it and I hope you enjoyed it because that's all you gonna get. Sex doesn't have to lead to anything but SEX. That's how men think, now women need to think like that too.

    If you want some sex, get some sex.... but don't think that just because you gave up some poontang you're entitled to be called back or some sorta relationship is suppose to be had. Just get layed if you wanna get layed and leave it at that. If you are not comfortable with getting layed without the thinking that it should lead to something in return... then don't get layed. Stop blaming it on the dude that you gave it up and he didn't call or give something in return. That's your fault.
     
  9. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    newsflash......

    :geek: not every women is good in bed.......and the ones what ain't don't never know it
     
  10. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    I don't think sex had a thing to do with it , beside it was just a mere one night stand
    and that what it was......
     
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