Black Relationships : Why Date at all? Why not just arrange marriages between good families?

Maybe have it so that couples:
1. Be required to live together for x amount of years before marriage
2. Have family, friends, coworkers sign a petition stating they agree with the couples decision* i mean afterall whether direct or indirectly they too go through the trials, the happy and not so happy times*

People are already doing (1)...it's called "playing house"...People can become comfortable when doing that, and then they see no reason to get married.
 
In some states if a couple is living for over X amount of years it becomes "common law marriage"...and I have friends who are in that and have refused to get married because now it's almost as if what's yours is mine and mine is yours...and when the couple splits it's almost like getting divorced.

EDIT: I previously said "married for over X...." I mean "living"
 
Lol more than 2 sigs, of course

naw.. how about expiration dates.. and renewal negotiations.. both sides pays a half-grip for the license.. and that money is protected by legislation and refunded at expiration of the marriage contract. so, you could say, "marry me for a year"... or.. "dang.. 2 more months and I'ma be rid of yo as#" ..
 
Why are some people so 'hung up' on the American concept of a legal marriage when for so long Black people weren't allowed to legally marry but still managed to be in committed relationships and form healthy family units and a build community? Was that done because a piece of paper made it so? Does the paper really bind people together emotionally/spiritually or just legally? It's about what's in the minds and hearts of our people that matter most, in my opinion. Does America really care whether Black people get married or divorced? It's going to get paid either way--when you marry and when you divorce--papers to sign, fees to pay. Living in America, there's a whole lot that Black folk need to wrap their brains around. I care more about the health and wellness of our relationships and less about whether those relationships end up in a marriage. If those marriages are arranged and they work for the couple, their families, their community, it's all good. If the couple find each other by chance and they work the same, it's all good. The issue isn't marriage and how/if that comes about, it's about the PEOPLE who are involved...what's in their minds and hearts...is there some type of balance.
 
Why are some people so 'hung up' on the American concept of a legal marriage when for so long Black people weren't allowed to legally marry but still managed to be in committed relationships and form healthy family units and a build community? Was that done because a piece of paper made it so? Does the paper really bind people together emotionally/spiritually or just legally? It's about what's in the minds and hearts of our people that matter most, in my opinion. Does America really care whether Black people get married or divorced? It's going to get paid either way--when you marry and when you divorce--papers to sign, fees to pay. Living in America, there's a whole lot that Black folk need to wrap their brains around. I care more about the health and wellness of our relationships and less about whether those relationships end up in a marriage. If those marriages are arranged and they work for the couple, their families, their community, it's all good. If the couple find each other by chance and they work the same, it's all good. The issue isn't marriage and how/if that comes about, it's about the PEOPLE who are involved...what's in their minds and hearts...is there some type of balance.


I care more about the relationship end also. Both parties having the mental, emotional, and compassionate stability to endure the tough times as well as the good.

I think, what the signed certificate does is insures each party legal rights over ones assets if something was to happened. This is very important also. If one party gets sick, or God forbid, dies, the stronger of the two has the legal rights to make decisions and/or collect the assets built on the behalf of the other. Without that marriage certificate anyone related or associated (if a business has been obtained) can fail claims over the revenue which was built together by the couple.

So both are equally important. Especially when a healthy strong union has been established and children are involved.

:heart:
 

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