Black Relationships : Why are some women blind when it comes to men

Some females fall in love too easily. When you go looking for love you will usually end up getting hurt. Everbody wants to be loved. I remembered a female telling me that her cousin was crying because she did not have a date. Too many females define themselves with who they are dating or with. It maybe be a self esteem issue. A person with high self-esteem would not tolerate being treated anything less than the queen she is.
 
karmashines said:
Women deny their biological nature every time they settle for having sex with no emotional attachment.

Most women want the best of both worlds; physical pleasure and romantic love. I don't see why so many men think that's weird or abnormal.


Maybe because too many women are trying to compete with men by acting like men.
 
Sekhemu said:
Maybe because too many women are trying to compete with men by acting like men.

They are acting like men when it comes to indiscriminate sex. However, unlike men, if a woman is single, she will not apply the 'throwaway' principle to the man she had sex with. Usually, she will want to pursue more; the sex makes her feel more attached to the man.

The only situations where it truly wouldn't be like this would be prostitutes and porn stars who have some type of dysfunction where they can detach themselves from sex emotionally. For them it's all about money, so it's not a big deal.
 
panafrica said:
This is absolutely true! However, what causes low self-esteem, and how can it be restored?

Part of the problem is having a dysfunctional or absent male rolemodel in their lives. So, in addition to wanting to meet the biological urges of physical pleasure, the emotional urges of nurturing and being nutured, some women are subconsciously seeking to replace the father figure missing in her life.

Another problem is how our society is. It is clear as soon as a girl is born, that her life is worthy only if she can 'win' a man's affections and get married. Little girls learn this lesson early through their play with Barbie, baby dolls, and whatever else contributes to this dysfunction. When they get older, they'll be bombarded with media images, magazine articles, etc. that talk about how you win a man, reinforcing what is beautiful in addition to making you feel like **** if you don't meet this standard, and so on and so forth.

How to solve this problem? That's a hard question. Even girls who had fathers in the home, such as myself, can still feel unworthy if they're not in a relationship when they grow up. Physical needs makes the issue even worse. So to be honest, I can't come up with a cureall. The problem is so deeply rooted in society that I believe if society doesn't make some effort to change, it's just going to continue. Having stable family environments do help, however.
 

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