Black Parenting : Whipping And Spanking Our Children!

Astrologer4U

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I usually don't watch Doctor Phil but in the preview on the show that would be coming on today, it showed a black woman standing next to Doctor Phil and Doctor Phil said something like "A woman who thinks it's okay to spank other peoples children" So I wanted to see how they were going to ridicule the black woman.

I will paraphrase what the people were saying...

The black woman doesn't have any children but she takes good care of her nephew and spends a lot of time with him. Doctor Phil asked the black woman was she spanked as a child and the woman's response was, yes she was. Doctor Phil asked her how did that affect her and the lady's response was... I'm 25, I don't have any children, I finished college, I have a good job, I am a respectable citizen and I have a good and happy life.


Any way, some white specialist I suppose, was on the stage and she told the black woman that she was a horrible person and that she should never put her hands on someone else's child. That black woman was like, he's not someone elses child, he is my nephew and the white woman was like, I don't care, that doesn't make him your child, how dare you put your hands on someone elses child, how dare you hit any child... and she went on to try and demonize the black woman but suprisingly, it didn't work. The black woman's response was, I can tell you this, when my nephew becomes an adult, he won't be trying to rob anyone and he won't be ending up in Jail. The audience clapped their hands and no one clapped for the white woman at all, the audience was quiet when she spoke but when the black woman spoke the audience understood. The white woman went on to say, You are putting fear into him, you are making him afraid of you, how can you love the child and make the child fear you at the same time, what about when he gets old enough and big enough to start hitting you back what you gonna do then. I was like, she is really trying to get the audience to be on her side, but it simply was not working. The black womans response was, I bet you when he becomes a grown man, he is going to love me even more, he is going to respect me and he is not going to be a young man that hangs out in the streets... the audience clapped.


Now, the whole entire time that I was watching this show, I am thinking about how we black people learned how to whip our children from white people, and now white people want to teach us that it is wrong. Actually, I shouldn't say that we learned to whip our children from white people but I will say that we aquired whipping or spanking as a way of discipline from white people. You see, back in the days because it is a bit different these days, remember my grandmother use to whip me with a stick and I remember when my other grandmother used to make us go and get a fresh long tree that was fat at the base but got slim towards the end, she would have us take the leaves off the switch then she would whip us. I know that way of spanking us or disciplining us came from white people during slavery. Here is the difference though, when my grandma would whip us, it was because we did something she told us not to do and we were big enough to understand that we were doing something that could get us hurt sometimes even killed. I remember me and my cousins went missing for a long time, my aunty, who is my grandmas daughter, she was looking for us and could not find us. Well, we got the twisted idea to go run around in the graveyard across the street from my aunts apartment building, we played over in that place like it was a playground. When we got tired of playing, we hopped back over the fence and was headed to my aunts house, when we got there, my aunt was getting into her car to go and look for us, and she saw us hopping the fence, she asked us what were we doing coming out of the graveyard at night, we began to lie, she didn't even bother with asking us no more questions, she just took us into the house and got to whipping our butts with a leather belt. I tell you, after that day, we never went into the graveyard to play again and we never stayed out late when we were supposed to be in the house.


My point is, when black people spank or whip their children out of discipline not anger, they are doing that because they don't want their children to get hurt. Back in slavery days, mama preferred to whip her child to teach him a lesson before the white man got a hole of him and did something worse, like kill 'im or her. That same reason is why some of us do it today, we know the difference between when our children made an honest mistake and when they are being just plain old risky and defiant, we don't want the cops getting a hole of our children so they can do to our children what childrens rights will send parents to jail for doing. Isn't that crazy, a cop can beat your child and nothing gets done about it. Then if the cop beats your black child, the cop as well as the white institutions, the blame you for why the kid is what he has become and they blame the father who for the most part is not in the home. Father is not in the home, mother is a single parent and she can't hit her child but she can call the police on her child and let the cops discipline him... Wow! What is that telling the child who takes advantage of the fact that his or hers single mother works late ours to take care of them?


I never had to spank my child but if I would have had a reason to, I would have.


Whats interesting about it is, look at white people, a people who don't believe in spankings, they believe in letting their children be equal to them. Look at how they act as adults, stealing land, killing innocent people, manipulating the planet and destroying it. They are the ones who act like spoiled and un disciplined children because they don't know what it is like to respect people. Even when their parents can't take care of themselves, most white people throw their parents away, put them away in homes where they hardly ever visit them.



Astrologer4U
 


fr33bklyn you can teach kids how to act. laying your hands on them is teaching them to hit people.
you can teach kids how to act. laying your hands on them is teaching them to hit people.

Not true. I come from a latin and black family. They both spank. About 95% of my friends are white and 75% of them don't get spanked. You should see their attitudes. It sickens me. She's not saying for all "white" children, she's just pointing out what she observed. It's the American culture that is evolving and filtering out respect. So now it's not just the white kids. It's all the kids that have parents and grandparents that lived in America.

monkey93xf Yep. I've noticed that "white" children don't have as much respect for their parents. Not saying that all don't...I'm just saying as a mixed minority child I see a lot of cultures, most cultures, have a lot of respect for their parents. Whereas the "American Culture" has lost the lines of respect and status

kphillips0504 I think you have to put it on their behinds to keep it on there minds.

kayycaris91 Show Hide 0 Marked as spam Reply | Spam wow the guy under me is seriously crazyy..really?? you wouldnt beat the mess out of your kids if they disrespect you? your a **** idiot...there is no need to even put any curse words in what you say..that doesnt prove your point..obviously you werent brought up right by callin people names and stuff..go you..way to go you just won the worlds most idiotic person award.congrats.

monkey93xf (2 days ago) Show Hide 0 Marked as spam Reply | Spam If a kid puts a hand on a stove he'll know not to do it again. If you tell him not to for the rest of his life he'll always want to do it. One day he'll put his hand on his stove and get the same result. Learn early. Learn fast. The rest of your life will be a little smoother
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmY4BXpJ3DY&feature=fvsr
 


BksAriesBaby91 Reply | Spam but i know that my mother di not play that with me. i am 18 years old, and i am a very respectful person, of myself and of others. and forget a belt my mama use to be us with a plastic yellow baseball bat. lol i am not lying, but i thanked my mother for the way she raised me because i see other girls my age going down the wrong road and its just sad. but thats the problem with the younger generations


lloo567 I don't know. So many people seem to think spanking is the answer. I worked with a group of kids that would make you want to get a vasectomy, and they all got spanked at home. So it's not as easy as just grabbing a belt.



BksAriesBaby91 i so agree with both of you. im so glad yall brought this up because i swear i was thinking about this the other day. these mothers and fathers are growing up with their kids, literally. because of this i believe that both the parent(s) along with the child is figuring out life and making mistakes together instead of the child having someone to discipline them.
as far as school, the parents need to go to open school night everytime it comes around or at least do what makael's mother did.


BeatmakerzUp if administered with love and calmness can be very helpful to a child, as a form of discipline. Unfortunately many parents administer spankings out of anger and rage, and that is often emotionally damaging to a child's personality. What makes it abuse is its out-of-control nature - when a parent is venting their frustrations on their child without first making a calm and calculated decision about what is an appropriate punishment.



babybaghead
I think your title says it all parents are not teaching. We have to teach using butt whoopings should be the last resort. parents need to learn how to teach...because we wont the behavior to continue even when we parents arent looking.


kevbrav Violence perpetuates violence. All your doing is teaching your children that violence is ok.


prettywhit ITS SO TRUE!!! I'm 22 with a 2 yr old and I realize how a LOT of parents, young and old, aren't disciplining their children. My friends think I'm too mean, but as a single parent, i don't want to be a statistic. I do see some parents that whoop their kids and the kids do become immune but what ppl fail to realize is that it takes MORE than that. If they whoop the kids, they don't teach them right from wrong. Ppl let their kids do whatever nowadays and they will pay for it when the child grows up
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yd-fvH2dNNs
 
Some parents, Black and White, confuse the difference between "abuse" and "discipline."

When parents hit their children in anger, that's not "discipline."
When parents hit their children to release stress from their own lives, that's not "discipline."

Beating a child for every infraction, small or large, is not "discipline."

Many Black adults today, can look back on their own childhoods and honestly say that, yes, sometimes, they were "abused" even though they may harbor no ill feelings towards their mothers or fathers for those instances.

No parent is perfect.

Many parents who use corporal punishment do so in "discipline."

And many parents beat the h3ll outta their children for everything they do wrong because that's the only deterrent they know and it's what was done to them.

However, many of us who were raised with corporal punishment may look back on some of our own "whuppins" (and of friends & family) with humor now; but if we're honest with ourselves, we would also admit that some of those "whuppins" were not just "discipline." ----It was "abuse."

Again, no parent is perfect.

But, people also sometimes do the "wrong things for the right reasons."
 

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