Discussion in 'Black Teenagers - Teenz Exprezzed!' started by mizz-eccentrik, Nov 16, 2005.
forget it..im done with all guys!
Sister Mizz-Eccentrik ... instead of being upset that someone responds in a manner that you don't find acceptable, be thankful that you have the ability within you to discern such things.
Now that you feel the way you do, that he is really playing a game, and not being sincere and serious like you ... count it a blessing! What if you couldn't see that? What if there was nothing in you to determine that he was just wanting sex? What if the only way you'd know this, is to allow him in your body, and then find out the truth?
There is nothing wrong with anyone wanting what they want. If a young man only wants sex, he's entitled to that. Just as you are entitled to a more meaningful relationship. There are young men that want more meaningful relationships, you just gotta find them. It may be difficult to see right now, he may be like a needle in a hay stack, but that's okay too.
You're in school right now. You are there for a reason. To get an education, a diploma. To do your best in your studies. Yes, having a sincere and loving boyfriend would make the time spent more pleasurable, but that's not what you're there for ... and even if you don't get that, you still have to get some A's!
Don't lose your focus Sister, and be thankful that God has given you the ability to see things clearly.
Much Much Love and Peace!
What you are experiencing is pretty normal for college aged adults. Hormones raging outta control, and all. However, there are ways to find out if a guy is all about "that thang":
1) Pay attention to him talking about $ex too much, especially if you've made it clear that is not what page you're on.
2) Does he treat you differently around his friends?
3) IF you have been intimate, was there a rush into it?
4) Pay close attention to the vibe you're sending out to him, some guys mistake kindness for easy access.
5) Keep your heart at a distance till' you're sure of his motive, start off from a friendly approach (when you're friends, you'll get a better understanding of his level of respect for females).
In this situation, if isn't healthy to judge all men based on what your father did. Just make sure you avoid the undesirables. Don't be pressured into something that can take a heavy toll in the long run. You can even make a written checklist of what is/isn't acceptable, sort of reflect on that when approached. SOME guys are so charming from the gate, it's hard to deny their advances, kinda like a lure!LOL. Good Luck on your love quest, and your education. Sometimes you just gotta let love find you, this way, you know the guy is truly interested
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