I'm wondering... How do YOU keep it moving:?: Tonite, I'm feeling extremely SAD and hopeless. My people are hurting and I'm hurting too. I'm tired of all the bickering, fighting, backbiting and un-trustworthiness. I'm tired of watching the events unfold to destroy the SPIRIT of AFreekaness. "Caring" and "Loving" "black" folks is a liability that I'm NOT willing to give up. At the same time, I KNOW it is this very Caring and Loving that leaves me in a very vulnerable position. At lot of my sadness and pain probably has to do with the "work" I do on a daily basis. Hearing and Seeing the EFFECTS OF SLAVERY in the lives, minds, hearts and most importantly, the BEHAVIORS of the people directed towards the self and others. For those of a FULLY CONSCIOUS MIND....how do you maintain:?: IN PARTICULAR....those who have no "mate" who is also CONSCIOUS or those who are surrounded by those who either don't WANT TO KNOW or those too sick to KNOW that they DON'T KNOW:?: Recently, I had a Man of Afreekan Descent, who holds a "high position" in the organization I work for, who betrayed my trust. I suppose, in the end, it's MY FAULT for "trusting" him yet I did and now my work environment is more "hostile" ...as I experience it. It's NOT SAFE to TALK and to hold it all in is not safe. What to do and where to turn. I live in a "bluelight" district and the people are comfortable with engaging in destructive behaviors and are not able to offer any hope or support. I'm FEELING the Stress and Trauma and it HURTS....my SPIRIT. "and if I get lucky, maybe I'll make it to [fifty]..HAPPY STILL AIN'T NO FRIEND OF MINE" (Tanya Stephens, Cherry Brandy) Stress- Internal or External influences that disrupt an individual's normal state of well-being Positive Stress - Adverse experiences that are short-lived and a normal and part of the developmental processes Tolerable stress - More intense but relatively short-lived. With adequate support, unlikely to cause long-term problems Toxic Stress - Sustained adversity. Children unable to manage this by themselves and can lead to permanent changes in brain development. Traumatization occurs when both internal and external resources are inadequate to cope with external threat. I am living with Toxic Stress and have not sufficient nor adequate resources to "cope". Do ya'll and if so..where are you getting it from:?: I do the best I can with meditations, Ancestral 'worship', recognizing the "power within"...yet...these things seem insufficient in the face of continued Toxic stress....sustained adversity Can anyone help a SiStar out:?: M.E.