Black Poetry : What Lies Beneath

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Euphoria, Apr 30, 2002.

  1. Euphoria

    Euphoria Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Her hair is matted to her scalp
    by sweat and the dirt beneath

    Her body covered in the clean slim of soap
    in an attempt to clean the dirt beneath

    Her eyes empty and hollow, trying to hide
    the pain which reveals the dirt beneath

    Her skin is broken, covered blue and purple
    it does not conceal the dirt that lies beneath

    Her lips bleeding, unmoving, too afraid
    that they will utter the words of the dirt beneath.


    28/4/02
    *Emma*
     
  2. Derrick Jay

    Derrick Jay Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    ...in that distant corner she cowers
    a single breath too loud in still air
    the wind builds for another gasp
    and her brain runs for cover
    wondering how this love too is painful...

    tight piece here, i'm feelin this...

    One,
    Derrick Jay
     
  3. Euphoria

    Euphoria Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    um......

    Thanks heaps for reading Derrick Jay, love the poetic response, but I just have to ask you a quick question. Did you really understand what the piece was about? It's just that your last line is in complete opposition of my meaning. Just a question. Thanks for reading.
    *Emma*
     
  4. Derrick Jay

    Derrick Jay Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i was taking it in upon spiritual flight the moment after...hmm, maybe i did miss something. i'll re-read and see if it speaks differently to me, thats just where i was when i read it the first time...thanks for asking

    One,
    Derrick Jay
     
  5. Euphoria

    Euphoria Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    OK thanks Derrick Jay.
    Let me know what you think the second time around.
    *Emma*
     
  6. Aminata

    Aminata Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Emma...

    I feel her pain...I've been there once.

    Here is an exerpt of something I wrote from my piece, "Reaching for the Hem of His Garment" :

    "scrubbing with blak soap and loofahs never do enough,
    the pains still resides in the pores of my melanin skin. If only I could Reach the Hem of His Garment"

    ~I am moved~

    Aminata (Afridancr)
     
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