Black Relationships : What does Marriage mean?

[warriorprincess]

I respect your perception.

What exactly is a spiritual contract?

a contract, meaning a binding agreement, in non existent IMHO in the spirit. If the concept is to be "free".

I think a major part of our collective problem is treating conceptual ideas and things of the spirit as carnal or superficial

such as

marriage and business
justice and business
God and religion

each sets boundaries and parameters to concepts that are timeless, ageless, and physically non existent

I guess what I mean by spiritual contract is more so spiritual union....the union of two spirits and the commitment to the upliftment of another spiritual being. Then for those that believe...a commitment to God that involves that person. Sometimes we are bound to people by circumstances that are predetermined but even in those relationships there is a bit of choice there. We can choose to stick closely to someone and make them our primary interest. We can choose to get close enough to learn them, learn from them, and vice versa.

Are you saying that a union should not have boundaries? and parameters?

 

[warriorprincess]

Mrs. Lady..

from my view, it's going to end regardless of how you go in.. whether by death or
growth or mutual decision, etc.. but, I don't see that as a negative thing..
from my view, the end colors the present.. a recognition of the impermanent
nature of life and the things that we build atop life.. in my opinion, has the
ability to enrich each experience.. it says, "you won't always have this chance..
so enjoy it while you can".. and.. "there will come a day when you have to let her go..
so hold her while you can.".. and my references to "her" have to do with
viewing these things from my own lenses.. it's not to exclude anyone or anykind of relationship..

It sounds like you are saying that the possibilty of a relationship's end does not nullify the need for a commitment. Is that it?

 

[MRS. LADY]

Mrs. Lady..

from my view, it's going to end regardless of how you go in.. whether by death or
growth or mutual decision, etc.. but, I don't see that as a negative thing..
from my view, the end colors the present.. a recognition of the impermanent
nature of life and the things that we build atop life.. in my opinion, has the
ability to enrich each experience.. it says, "you won't always have this chance..
so enjoy it while you can".. and.. "there will come a day when you have to let her go..
so hold her while you can.".. and my references to "her" have to do with
viewing these things from my own lenses.. it's not to exclude anyone or anykind of relationship..

Much Respect Brother Skuderjaymes:

Thank you for not excluding , because I think this is the "nature" of "separation"

To me I guess I'm to the point where I have realized that "life" as we know it, is not, just like death as we know it is not

Where I am is here

my eye actually yields this perception of "life"

"end" is illusion, because time never actually begins

death or ends are perceived through the physical senses, and subject to nature, but because nature actually participates in the creation of death and ends, it's actually fighting for it's existence

creation moves on and further creates, and nature repeats

so when u say the "nature of life"

truly non existent, and all the more reason for a soul to return, still looking for the ultimate joy

 

[MRS. LADY]

I guess what I mean by spiritual contract is more so spiritual union....the union of two spirits and the commitment to the upliftment of another spiritual being. Then for those that believe...a commitment to God that involves that person. Sometimes we are bound to people by circumstances that are predetermined but even in those relationships there is a bit of choice there. We can choose to stick closely to someone and make them our primary interest. We can choose to get close enough to learn them, learn from them, and vice versa.

Are you saying that a union should not have boundaries? and parameters?

In a sense of actually trusting another with my very soul my answer would be yes

The standard that I have set for myself is that I want no boundaries

A sexual relationship should have boundaries and parameters, and the highest levels of self control

But "eternity" together, our "souls" have to be compatable, and the chaos of my spirit understood

the actual ritual associated with marriage is promises to bind

so if i can't trust completely my soul and heart in ur hands then with or without a physical contract it ain't gonna work

doubt is serious, and can ruin something beautiful all by itself

I agree it should be spiritual, no doubt

much love

 

[CreativeGrl]

I think that someone may have mentioned this before. I think of marriage as a means of bringing into the physical that which lies in the spiritual. I never understood until recently what people mean when they say that the love of their partner helps them to see God’s love for them. We are spiritual beings having human experiences. Therefore it makes sense to me that a physical contract would follow a spiritual one.

Before getting married, I think that it’s an easy goal to remain bonded to another person. After being married for a while, many of us may need reminders of the vows that we have taken and need support to keep those vows intact. Support for marriage can be simply accountability. For some of us the threat of consequences can make us think twice about a decision to end a marriage prematurely. To some, marriage represents a commitment not only between two people but between 2 families and that society.

To me, the government really just represents the “People”. Given what the US government means to our people, I can see why involving the government into their personal lives becomes undesirable. However, some things I do for symbolism. Even though I do not respect all of the society that I live in, I do respect the IDEA of a society that we are accountable to.

Lastly, I have no qualms with comparing marriage to a business relationship. Marriage is a lot of things and a business is one. When my partner and I are done w/ the lovey dovey stuff we flip on a different switch and lock into business mode. We handle our finances like a business (budgets and documentation)..and we are very strategic about our shorterm and longterm goals for ourselves and for our relationship.

I have a good friend who has a business partner and his loyalty to his business partner is so similar to a marriage that I tell him that he may as well be married. I don’t see a business relationship as a cold unfeeling thing. However, I know those images come to mind when most think of business. “Its not personal, its just business” lol. My relationship to everything and everyone is spiritual. The physical just backs that up and locks it in.

Wow, this was very well said.