Black Poetry : Warrior Mice

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by Harry Hyman, Feb 12, 2004.

  1. Harry Hyman

    Harry Hyman Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Warrior Mice

    The orange and gold of the desert floor
    did fade with the plummet of the Sun
    -and the red heat ebbed in the twilight,
    the blue stars twinkled in the nightlight,
    the brown sand shifted in the moonlight,
    Two mice did run, run, run

    thru a deep, deep gully of an upslant hill,
    over sand in the night sublime,
    -their hearts beat faster in the lost light,
    the impending disaster of a fright night
    by the claws of an owl now in midflight
    and its wings sliced the air from behind

    But as Warrior mice of the hot desert sand
    and designed for evasive speeds,
    -they flickered thru shadows of the night time,
    criss-crossed the black road's white line,
    confused the owl's sight line,
    Bringing food for their young 'uns needs

    And the orange and gold of the desert floor
    were the paints of the Dawn's next day
    -as the mice peeked once at the daylight
    thru the sweltering heat that was airtight,
    while the sand grew hot in the sunlight
    and the Owl put the hunt on delay.
    HH
     
  2. caramelpython

    caramelpython Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Nice scribr.. I really enjoyed the concept and flow.
     
  3. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    nice drop
    continue to flow
    .....Angel
     
  4. redlady

    redlady Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    hey...this was different...i enjoyed the write most definitely!
     
  5. deepy

    deepy going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    harry hyman
    I loved it...loved it as a metaphor...as it's literal self...
    and its sensual self.. and it's rhythms..which can be and go anywhere.
    thanks for bringing other dimensions...
     
  6. Khasm13

    Khasm13 STAFF STAFF

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    i can't pinpoint it yet
    what captured my mental with this flow
    i guess it was the concept that even
    the smallest...can still fight back...
    MUCH PROPS BLAK MAN.....word
    one love
    khasm
     
  7. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You take us to a different world with your writing, keep flowing as you do.
     
  8. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Love your style...
    always "refreshing" to read you!
     
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