The pain is fresh like jagged scars Ripped open with metal shards Of flying shrapnel Dodging between the shower of bullets Pelting the brick walls of my concrete consciousness I drown in seas of liquid iniquity Another sip of gin, rum, and vodka Sear my liver with alcoholic whips Punishment My peace is floating in gray clouds Of cannabis Blasting brain cells with attempts of forgetfulness Fill my lungs with another hit of nicotine Puff arsenic, tar, and toxins into my blood stream Cause the **** calms me by killing me Pain be the handcuff on my heart Arresting every thought and moment Frostbiting my soul Every time I watch another tear fall from a child’s eyes Every time I see a young girl peddling her *** To another batch of I don’t give a **** ghetto bastards These are the children the rainbow forgot Sunshine never loved them Grass be broken glass and gravel Castles in the sky elude us all There is nothing between the heavens and earth But the density of desperation and death So as the last tear streaks my ashen cheeks I close my eyes Let my soul drop into a bottomless abyss Elevate into states of ghetto yoga Where I transcend the pain through my pen Channel through the ******** of reality Until I can paint a portrait of the world My sentimental self can stand Art allows me to escape Though the pain never disappears It plays peek-a-boo with me on the edges of my existence The deeper I hide within The further it goes to root me out Dangle me on the strings of a destiny I imagine some young child will never reach Never live to see another day Draw another breathe But me in all my consciousness cannot save These lost daughters and sons of Liberty So I lie to myself and others Hoping no one will discover my weakness Force me to accept my own uselessness to our so called struggle This ain’t no revolution Where empty words be our only solutions Where we pack out cafes and clubs Induce states of euphoria on the mic By into our own conscious hype So we can all forget the hypocrites we really are May God forgive me for my denial But lately revolutionary masquerades are the style While we try to soothe ourselves Because we know that we have failed everyone Including the man in the mirror He claims he wants a change But lives his or her life the same everyday Does anyone pray anymore? Does God cease to exist if we no longer acknowledge him? And if there be no God Do we exist? I question every moment I continue to live Am I wasting my time? Because now it becomes more than issues of reason and rhyme Somehow we lost our reason for living Tried to rhyme on lost luster of life Cuz if we lost our reason to fight Then there would be no need to continue to rhyme Or find the reason Should we now consider this treason? If we are deceiving are selves and others With **** we don’t understand anymore than the next man And if we be masters of this realm Please show me the master plan for the masses So we can all raise the veil of ignorance from our collective unconsciousness Give me more than the scripted dialogue on education, economics, politics, and psychobabble intellectual ******** Liberation is not a physical concept It is freedom of the spirit and mind A brother charged us to leave this body So why don’t we? Physical shells dwell in the this place of third hell So why not free your selves? If we have not found a purpose for living Then we might as well give up trying to save others Become the victims we claim not be Yet we rely on who or what to give us equality? When we already possessed it in the first place Seems that we have forgotten who we are Like a star that has fallen from the heavens So my untitled thought throws a lifeline to my soul Places me back before the pen Driving me to find the answers to the questions Of why do I live this life?