Black Poetry : Under the Influence

karma55

Active Member
REGISTERED MEMBER
Feb 15, 2007
39
6
Gainesville, Georgia
Occupation
fast food
Have been geeked up trying to write a verse?
Cursing the demons that put you in this herse,
Hurting cause you done put in work,
Trying to get away roll a blunt and blaze
Portrayed as the victim when you should be prosecuted
Cause you just throwing you life away contributing to the tidalwave
Thats forcing you downward
Inebriated to the point that your inner is outward
Focus is on self
Reflections in the mirror
Corrections configured
Adjustments considered
Monologues delivered
How you figure this demon and this bottle could have me writin riddles
Twittling my thumbs thinking i'm playing the fiddle
Exposing confidentails
Far from influential
Hypocritical
Trying to convince myself
Cause they say i got potential
But i laced my credentials with THC!
And i'm not as smart as they think i am
Half of my brain cells are marked R.I.P.
The other half are destined to D.I.E.
I know cause rolling up is part of my daily routine
Its hard breaking habits and i've had it since elementary
Accidentally got hooked
Now look,
Im turning into a crook
Could be time to switch routes,
Get out, but then i'd need a motive and im far to relaxed
Plus this 40-proof's got me on my back
I'm D.W.I. and i know my lifes off track!
 
you are half way there

meaning you seem to understand what's going on around you

you know right from wrong

just have faith in yourself

and try to do the right thing

what goes around comes around

just make sure when it comes back to you it's all good

because you did good.

don't use that stuff man

it WILL bring you down

there's an old saying

"it's not what you do, but how you do it"

i think it's important

like if you drink diet coke, drink one, but don't drink 40 cans

so "it's not what you do, but how you do it"

but that doesn't mean try EVERYTHING

learn yourself

your limits

and most of all

keep your heart in the right place

don't get down on yourself

everybody makes mistakes

it's how you learn from them is what counts in the long run

good luck poet
 
First off, your rhyme scheme was off the hook, and the message hit the mark. Not sure if you're writing this in first person because it's about yourself, or because that was your choice of style. But you're saying here that you know you have to leave that junk alone, and that you have potential, and you are absolutely right sis. So happy that you are sharing your talent with us. :)
 
karma55 said:
Cause they say i got potential
But i laced my credentials with THC!
And i'm not as smart as they think i am
Half of my brain cells are marked R.I.P.
The other half are destined to D.I.E.
I know cause rolling up is part of my daily routine

Hard! Even harder to break. And, even harded to accept. No road is ever easy, especially when we add roadblocks to the one all ready there. Starting 10 yards behind almost guarantees we won't win the race, but there is nothing that says we can't be in it. I firmly believe that if you make yourself run, then you have a chance to win. Even if we don't win, finishing near the top counts for their are others races to run and another day to win--I liked it--Amun-Ra :bullseye:
 

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