Black Poetry : Under the Influence

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by karma55, May 20, 2007.

  1. karma55

    karma55 Active Member MEMBER

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    Have been geeked up trying to write a verse?
    Cursing the demons that put you in this herse,
    Hurting cause you done put in work,
    Trying to get away roll a blunt and blaze
    Portrayed as the victim when you should be prosecuted
    Cause you just throwing you life away contributing to the tidalwave
    Thats forcing you downward
    Inebriated to the point that your inner is outward
    Focus is on self
    Reflections in the mirror
    Corrections configured
    Adjustments considered
    Monologues delivered
    How you figure this demon and this bottle could have me writin riddles
    Twittling my thumbs thinking i'm playing the fiddle
    Exposing confidentails
    Far from influential
    Hypocritical
    Trying to convince myself
    Cause they say i got potential
    But i laced my credentials with THC!
    And i'm not as smart as they think i am
    Half of my brain cells are marked R.I.P.
    The other half are destined to D.I.E.
    I know cause rolling up is part of my daily routine
    Its hard breaking habits and i've had it since elementary
    Accidentally got hooked
    Now look,
    Im turning into a crook
    Could be time to switch routes,
    Get out, but then i'd need a motive and im far to relaxed
    Plus this 40-proof's got me on my back
    I'm D.W.I. and i know my lifes off track!
     
  2. Da Street So'ja

    Da Street So'ja Banned MEMBER

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    you are half way there

    meaning you seem to understand what's going on around you

    you know right from wrong

    just have faith in yourself

    and try to do the right thing

    what goes around comes around

    just make sure when it comes back to you it's all good

    because you did good.

    don't use that stuff man

    it WILL bring you down

    there's an old saying

    "it's not what you do, but how you do it"

    i think it's important

    like if you drink diet coke, drink one, but don't drink 40 cans

    so "it's not what you do, but how you do it"

    but that doesn't mean try EVERYTHING

    learn yourself

    your limits

    and most of all

    keep your heart in the right place

    don't get down on yourself

    everybody makes mistakes

    it's how you learn from them is what counts in the long run

    good luck poet
     
  3. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    First off, your rhyme scheme was off the hook, and the message hit the mark. Not sure if you're writing this in first person because it's about yourself, or because that was your choice of style. But you're saying here that you know you have to leave that junk alone, and that you have potential, and you are absolutely right sis. So happy that you are sharing your talent with us. :)
     
  4. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    wow.....another awesome scribe sis
    ya word play and message hit home
    as i relate to da vibe .....keep droppin it hot
     
  5. Amun-Ra

    Amun-Ra Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Hard! Even harder to break. And, even harded to accept. No road is ever easy, especially when we add roadblocks to the one all ready there. Starting 10 yards behind almost guarantees we won't win the race, but there is nothing that says we can't be in it. I firmly believe that if you make yourself run, then you have a chance to win. Even if we don't win, finishing near the top counts for their are others races to run and another day to win--I liked it--Amun-Ra :bullseye:
     
  6. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sister, you have my vote of confidence. Got me a serious contact high off of your incredible joint. PEACE
     
  7. Tha-Emissary

    Tha-Emissary Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Mmmm I feel that rhythmic power in this. You may be off track but at least you've taken the first step to getting back on track because you understand the situation and how it's bringing you down. Now all you have to do is switch lanes and pave yourself a smooth new road. Life is what we make it and anything is possible. Just Believe! Peaceout nice joint.
     
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