Black Poetry : Unconscious (a cry for the Diaspora): in 6 pts.

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by PositiveMindset, Nov 27, 2002.

  1. PositiveMindset

    PositiveMindset Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2002
    Messages:
    1,601
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    Rocky Mountains, High
    Ratings:
    +14
    I remember relaxing by the coastal waters of Gambia
    Thinking of my future life with my future wife.
    When a large wooden boat invades the vision of my eyes.
    I began to wonder, what could they be, friend or enemy?
    As they got closer I could see they looked different than me.
    Ghosts upon the water, that was a prophecy being fulfilled.
    Being peaceful as I was my soul was being thrilled
    With the concept of making friends from abroad.
    I'd give them food, shelter, clothing, and the respect due to Gods.
    They get off the boat an drow towards shore in 2 smaller ones
    With sticks in their hands that weren't made of wood.
    The looks on their faces revealed their intentions weren't good.
    As they approached me I offered peace with an extended hand
    Saying in my native tongue,
    "Welcome to my beautiful motherland."
    But I was greeted with a blow that knocked me unconscious.
     
  2. wildflower7

    wildflower7 Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2001
    Messages:
    1,303
    Likes Received:
    4
    Occupation:
    motherhood
    Location:
    maryland
    Ratings:
    +4
    hm!
    strong opening... :spinstar:
     
  3. DigginThaShyne

    DigginThaShyne Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2001
    Messages:
    179
    Likes Received:
    3
    Occupation:
    Presenter of Words
    Location:
    Hamlet,NC (The Middle of Nowhere)
    Ratings:
    +3
    I'm loving this one....the message is on point, and the imagery, all to frighteningly real....A+++ from me for this one

    keep scribin'

    MJ
     
  4. Blkthunder

    Blkthunder Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2002
    Messages:
    363
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    With the thunder gods
    Ratings:
    +6
    Come on with it....
    flow on
     
  5. PoeticAlize

    PoeticAlize Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2002
    Messages:
    98
    Likes Received:
    2
    Occupation:
    Student...c/o 2003
    Location:
    Virginia Beach
    Ratings:
    +2
    come wit cuz i can see you gonna run wit it. i likes
     
  6. msluciousb

    msluciousb Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2001
    Messages:
    2,696
    Likes Received:
    5
    Occupation:
    Self Employed, Business Consultant
    Location:
    Kansas City, Missouri
    Ratings:
    +6
    UMMMMM!

    I see a prevalent theme...and some of us are still "Unconcious"!
    BLESSINGS ON YA HOUSE!
     
  7. PositiveMindset

    PositiveMindset Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2002
    Messages:
    1,601
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    Rocky Mountains, High
    Ratings:
    +14
    Had 2 bring this back one mo' gin.

    Hope y'all forgive me & enjoy.
     
  8. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2003
    Messages:
    12,660
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    somewhere ova da rainbow....
    Ratings:
    +219
    come on wit it now...i was so in dis wow
     
  9. angelicsage

    angelicsage Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    May 30, 2003
    Messages:
    5,322
    Likes Received:
    38
    Location:
    ~The hidden library...~
    Ratings:
    +39
    Breathtaking...

    You never cease to amaze me...

    yes...this deserved the one mo' gin!


    Incredible...your writing is!
     
  10. Bluewater

    Bluewater Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2003
    Messages:
    6,008
    Likes Received:
    44
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Praising The Lord
    Location:
    Baltimore, MD
    Ratings:
    +44
    as the tale is unfold
    letting it be told
    wonderful
    Peace
     
Loading...