Poetry Critiques : Two fallen stars....

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by nevar, Jun 19, 2005.

  1. nevar

    nevar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I remember when I was alone I would look up in the sky
    And in the sky would be my two favorite stars

    These particular two I cherish from the heart
    You see you may not understand why I sought comfort from them
    Their light shone bright and was never dim

    They had a glow no other could see
    Just to be among them was a treat

    One had a passion for music the other life
    One was a devoted father and the other a devoted wife

    I peared into the sky and one was gone
    Could it be she left to go home

    Sad I was to never look upon her glow
    I know in my heart she loved me tho'

    Months later the same thing happened again
    God I can't believe I've just lost another friend

    Now my two favorite fallen stars I will forever miss
    There are many other stars among me, but these two will forever shine with bliss

    This is dedicated to my Grandmother and Uncle I love you always!!!!!!!!!!
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    I have to say it was created beautifully and a grand dedication
    this poem will touch many lives ....it hold depth and realism
    don't change not a verse ......great poem from the heart !
     
  3. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This stellar poem is at home in the heavens, GREAT WORK, poet!
     
  4. nevar

    nevar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    to poet sought

    thanks for the love i so yearn to be a famous writer and i'm glad to be able share my gift. i thankyou from the bottem and top of my heart :hearts4:
     
  5. Auroraflower

    Auroraflower Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    now i like this....



    No Critiques





    You shine to Beautifull Poet.... :hearts4:
     
  6. nevar

    nevar Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    to auraflower

    thankyou for reading my poem.
     
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