Black Relationships : True or false. Dudes must go thru a "playa" stage and females must go thru a....

[chin-wendu]

This is false. It depends on the persons (male or female), who they are and how they feel about who they are as a person. There are so many circumstances positive and negative that contribute but bottom line, when a person gets to a certain point (in adulthood), the choices made they are accountable for and no one else.

What I believe is that some men who are players usually are not doing their job, as a man, as they are at the bottom of the category. Maybe they were not a good son, brother, husband or father and now use the one area (messing over women) as sort of a redeemer...so to speak. In some sort of way, trying to boost their own self-esteem and self-image through how many women chase them, they string along, use and dispose of like toilet tissue. It will never work. Who ever this applies to, please take back your role as the man...a real man, and not the fake one.

Regarding some women, who use to be the back-up anchor in the family and is now the destroyer of younger generations. So many women are totally empty and their self-esteem and image is based on how many men want them (no matter the reason), chase them, whose men they lure from another women...it has even gotten to the point where some women share men..some are just that desperate. There are some women who inside do not like who they are and believe that every man should want to be with them and is seriously offended when they are not (this is mental sickness). If a man does not want you it does not make him gay, as you are not the only woman in the world...he just does not want you. Live with it. Whoever this applies to...it's past time to wake up. Some men will like you and some men will not. Every man is not going to like you, men are different and that is just the plain truth. Doing all the slimmy things that some women do, just to get a man to like you, give attention or interest is only adding to the internal mess that is unsettled in the person.

Being a playa or a hoochie is a choice, and one does not have to go through any such stage at all.

 

[MRS. LADY]

i'd have to say false

playerism and hoochieism is learned behavior....

somewhere at sometime someone planted a seed that grew... or weed rather........

thank goodness for weed wackers.....

love yourself.

 

[cherryblossom]

I disagree as well.

That behavior in young men and older men is usually learned either directly or indirectly through their home environments and/or peers who are just as misguided as they are.

They have been "taught" that such behavior makes them more of a "Man."
...that how many women they have sex with somehow validates their "manhood."

And women, young and old, who are promiscuous usually do so out of low-self esteem...."looking for "love" in all the wrong places" and all the wrong ways.

....And that behavior can also be "learned" from their home environments and peers....propagated thru generations of women who think that the best they have to offer is their bodies....and if she could just sex him the "right" way, then he will "love" her.

Again, more low self-esteem.

 

[jamesfrmphilly]

women who are promiscuous usually do so out of low-self esteem.....

i have known women who just liked to screw

 

[KMTSista]

i have known women who just liked to screw

LOL, always leave it to James to put right out there ROTFLMAO!