Poetry Critiques : trees

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by daroc, May 19, 2005.

  1. daroc

    daroc Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i was on the bus back to college staring out the window at all the dead trees
    and this is what came to mind....

    what is a dead tree?
    for every
    is there one lost soul
    for every
    they kill for us
    knock down to use for us
    is there a life
    that dies with it?
    are we
    trees....
    swaying in the wind
    waiting for sunshine
    to be let in
    and brighten our lives
    in dreary days of distress
    or
    enjoying winter
    because
    we get to shed our leaves
    past memories
    to start over
    in a new year
    new season
    are we
    trees...
    what is a dead tree?
    limp
    leaning
    looking for help
    how is that
    any different from me?
     
  2. HODEE

    HODEE Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This is deep Darac

    for every
    is there one lost soul
    for every
    they kill for us
    knock down to use for us



    for every tree
    is there one lost soul
    for every tree
    they kill for use
    knock down to use for us

    Other wise this is a great poem. I like the Parallels. This makes the reader think. Trees do have rings that correspond to events in life. There is a science that studies this and they have charted events in history to tree rings. You can also tell how old a tree is by it's rings. Rings are the center of the tree, working their way to the edge. We are like trees. :smokin:

    Like the threads in the quilt man weaves , the threads are black and gold. The rings of a tree has to a story to be told.

    Side note for ya! No bearing on this flow. ( have you signed up and seen the book info? Come on in we are ready.)
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    i like this and it's meanings for the life of a tree
    i agree on the part or it could have stated

    ( for every one
    is like a lost soul
    for every tree
    they kill for us
    is knocking the use of us )

    Many trees have a history and a life story
    what lay at the bark of a tree is untold but
    by destoring it kills life this was a gem ...
     
  4. 1poetsought

    1poetsought Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    In tune with the universe Daroc, is the mother of creation!
     
  5. daroc

    daroc Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    thanks for the advice yall
    i really appreicate it
     
  6. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    most welcome sista ....such gift u have
     
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