many people like to beat on other people. they are aggressive and sadistic. they enjoy beating people. one way they can do this is to get somebody of a supposed lower rank and then "correct" them. black people are often caught up in this as many folk see the need to "correct" us. there are those who enjoy "tough love". it can provide an opportunity to beat the mess out of somebody and then tell them it is for their own good. the tough lover wins all around. i hope you can see the dangers inherent in this approach. it is an easy refuge for sadists and bullies. i am saying, be careful who you accept your "tough love" from.