Black People : Today i feel Weak!

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by Poetic Justice, Mar 3, 2005.

  1. Poetic Justice

    Poetic Justice Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I am so depressed, everything is going wrong, what do i do, where do i turn.
    I am running out of energy to keep up this fight, please somebody help me tonight.
    I am so lonely for touch, its driving me mad, and i dont want nobody but the man that i had, why cant i shake this with all the bull i have been through, and to add fuel to the fire, i am really not even in it.
    its cold and i am lonely, and i feel guilty as hell, my mother didnt raise me to send people to hell, I want a home again to call my own, i am trying real hard to :insane: keep up this fight, no i dont want to return to my hell, i just want to feel happy again.
    So many things is standing in my way, the money is scarce and the house hunting to failing my way, this was not supposed to be a flow, so please dont take it there, this is a mad writer and its just going there, so if you feel its necessary to move it somewhere by all means take it, who gives a care.
    I know i am so supposed to be all strong and mean like, but all i want is a bottle of arbormist and a kiss tonight.
    Can i really do this, be alone all my life, because i will never give my love to another and disgrace myself in gods eyes, oh make it go away this pain that i feel, i hate him for this, this cant be for real. :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :flame: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :madd: :insane: :insane: :insane:
     
  2. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    that's what got you into trouble in the first place

    i have spent many nights alone.
    many, many.

    i don't want no body so much that i would take bad treatment.
    i get my own pleasure from within my own self.
    if you depend on him you will always be a slave.

    you have to decide what you want to be.
    slave or free.
    no body ever said freedom was easy.
    why you think there are so many slaves?

    because they are scared to be free.
     
  3. Poetic Justice

    Poetic Justice Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    oh, needed that so much today, its a shame but i hoped you would be here to pick me up off the floor.
    i am just having one of those days, thanks alot and i know you are right, i just have to find a way to Create a life for my beautiful, awesome, kids. :thinking:
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You were in this relationship for a long time, therefore you aren't going to break the ties that bind just like that, even if he did abuse you. You can't possibly try to take on every problem that you have all at once, to even attempt to do so is enough to drive anyone off the deep end.
    As far as being alone, you will learn to enjoy your own time and that of your children. It's not the same as being with a man, no, but you have to find that self contentment first. Living with a man has become almost second nature, I realize, but be patient with yourself, you have made so many positive changes. This is just another change you will learn to become accustomed to. I'm proud of you sister.
     
  5. info-moetry

    info-moetry STAFF STAFF

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    peace queen,

    I read this & see u still have plenty of energy in you, maybe it's just aimed in the wrong direction.......It is not hard to channel one's negative energy (your boyfriend or ex) & turn into something positive for yourself. Simply, within your mind unfocus the physical connection to him & ask yourself REPEATEDLY what did he or does he do for you mentally...........survey says:

    NOTHING
    - if anything he upsets your beautiful magnetic being which in turn causes static interference with your kids, causing negativity to find a home in your circumference...

    A home has already found YOU, if only u stop your tears & chasing an illusion that u are calling "a man" & recall the stregnth within u as the first being in creation (the black woman), the mother of the Earth you will free yourself sista.

    some say the mind is a terrible thing to waste
    I say negativity is a terrible thing to chase..................

    "Negativity (the man) has no power unless positivity (you) give it to HIM"

    I know u will free yourself of him, you have many great things to do & your children as well, but u have to be free for these things to be manifested!!!

    peace & love my queen.........U R FREE...............
     
  6. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    why not create one for your beautiful, awesome self?
     
  7. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I like you James, for always keeping it real...^5
     
  8. Nita

    Nita Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Gosh...

    Sister, please don't give up now. It's always hard at first but you have a life you have to protect and children you have to live for. I know you long to be touched..I've been there. When I first separated from my ex-husband it was very hard. I desired love and affection so so badly. I had to realize the situation I was in... and the situation my children were in and I had to be strong if for no one else but them. Before I knew it a month had passed..then a year..then two years and then three. Three and 1/2 years and I made it thru those years with NO love and NO affection. I remained faithful to a man who was still married to me but living with another woman and I made it.....

    You just have to talk to God a whole lot sister. I almost went crazy too. Surround yourself with positive people for extra support and strength. I'd hate for your efforts to be for NOTHING. Please don't get weak now...Please
     
  9. Akilah

    Akilah Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    STAY STRONG MY BEAUTIFUL COURAGEOUS SISTAH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :weights:

    God has brought you too far to leave you....you and your children are going to be alright !

    Much Love
    blessings & Peace
    Akilah
    :grouphug:
     
  10. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    i love bacon......

    yes i do.
    love it!
    when i go pass the food carts in Philly and i get the smell of the meat cooking, my mouth just waters and my stomach cramps up with desire.

    but i don't eat it.

    i know i've had two heart attacks and the next one might be my last.
    so even though i love the bacon, i walk on by and eat a piece of fruit.
     
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