Black Poetry : Toast to Domitian's Roast

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by AACOOLDRE, Jul 26, 2014.


    AACOOLDRE Well-Known Member MEMBER

    United States
    Jul 26, 2001
    Likes Received:
    WE Toast Domitian’s Roast: From the Gross to the Most
    By Andre Austin
    If Muhammad Ali could take off Howard’s Toupee
    Then Emperor Domitian’s wig is nothing but fair play
    Be a good host to ancient History while at Domitian Roast
    The table is spread out like Michael’s Last Supper from Alban Hills we coast

    Never forget history because its future reflects the past
    His lamb’s wool fake hair died and threw up a volcano’s blast
    The Rascality of Domitian’s skull looking like alf alfalfa’s Eagle Notch
    They tried to pedigree those bronze Hammer toes; but the operation was botched

    Then the Emperor favorite Eunuch he started to admire his locks
    I’m a man without all my equipment I want to keep all I got
    Domitian eyes got red mad and threw the Eunuch off the Dock
    His petrified body was pulled on the sand to rot from the sun that was hot

    At least he outlawed castration Eunuch’s no longer harboring dangerous fruit flies
    Files almost went extinct in Rome, Domitian put them in coffins I tell no lies
    Just ask Vulturnus who lived before the law was changed
    Now the girls don’t play with golden locks made deformed and strange
    Now he worships Hebe now a Little Child laughs hebephrenic

    The cutting has made him mad his niche lights no more without its bic
    But Vulturnus got his revenge by lifting Domitian’s woman gown
    The crowd laughs out loud for what little they see
    Like Steve I will substitute any gown for a Crown
    The Praetorian Guards executes the gigglers in the manner of a Public Enemy

    I can count well 1, 2, 3 The trinity, Domitian was the last to graft
    The Arabs invented algebra so I guess I get Shahidd to teach me higher Math
    And then went Statius I can poem down Domitian Road path
    And see the Imperium load of a treacherous Bed of a mad man’s Wrath

    Avoid Domitian’s circus ask St Paul who had to striped Nakid
    They found out he was a living Angel (no penis) from what Titus did
    Like Vulturnus bedraggled blonde locks now a memory of his dike it embanks
    You’ve siphoned off his obnoxious stain his phallus now in two fishtanks

    All the female gladiators laughed and the dwarfs laughed until stricken dead
    Paul was his stand up writer until he spoiled like half-baked bread
    History has many joys and is filled with many pains
    We Roasted it up sometimes out of laughter we get some gains
  2. rhymebad

    rhymebad Well-Known Member MEMBER

    United States
    May 11, 2006
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    tight vocab you said a lot didn't understand it all but enough keep dropping like this but I this is above the head of the audience here at destee