Black People : To weave or not to weave; that is the question...

Hairweave in a little girl's hair; cool or cruel?

  • If it makes her hair look cute/better, weave it on in.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Do something nice with the hair she was born with.

    Votes: 28 75.7%
  • Depending on the look of the weave, it is sometimes o.k.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Depending on the age of the child, it is o.k.

    Votes: 8 21.6%
  • If it boosts the child\'s self-esteem or makes them comfortable, weave it.

    Votes: 1 2.7%

  • Total voters
    37
I do believe we are on the same page...

Originally posted by dbaraka
It doesn't matter if it looks real.It's still fake.It seems to me that the more we look like Europeans the prettier we think we look. Could this be a form of self hate?

Well, let's see. 1. Most changes that Afrikan women in amerikkka make to their outer appearances are reflective of an apparent attempt to emulate the female caucazoid. 2. Attempts to emulate another are attempts to evade or abandon your own natural characteristics.

Therefore, if one attempts to emulate another (who is tremendously different), that would seem to evidence an extreme dislike/distaste (possible hatred) of what is essentially oneself. I think depending on the degree and duration of change, we could logically infer self-hatred. An extreme degree of preference for a different person's looks could be construed as "hatred" for oneself.

The thing that concerns me most about the situation is that the self-hatred is a result of brainwashing/conditioning. It is not a natural dislike of one's own characteristics. It is based on conditioning that comes from society and mass media.

The situation is perhaps even worse, more severe in Asia. Anyone read the reports about Asian women (and men) paying astronomical amounts of $$$ to have their faces (and tongues) cut up? Koreans and Chinese in particular (but Japanese and other Orientals as well) are beginning to have EYE, nose, chin, tongue jobs done. The Eye jobs are most prevalent, and teenage girls especially are having the procedure done in record numbers. Asian parents are giving their children eye-job "gifts" for graduation and such!!! Some parents are forcing their children to have the tongue jobs done, in order to--get this trash--"improve their English pronunciation"!!! A sad state of affairs, to say the very least.
 
no to the hairweave, no matter what age.

i hate to see little girls with hairweaves. and yes, it usually after the parent has or has let someone damage the child natural hair.

my hair was first permed at about age 11 or 12. before, i got the press and sometime curl. i had what people describe as good hair. it was long and thick. alot of my cousins didn't have such hair. they had "nappy, bad hair". i use these terms because these are the terms that were used. this caused some problems with my cousins and me. they were jealous and had no reason to be. i could haven't care if it was straight long, short or whatever. i have a cousin who hair had falling out so much because of the continuing damage she's done. she can't afford the frequent visits she feels she would need AND get weaves. her hair was so damage she wouldn't even cut it to help strength and even it out. she kept so she would have something for the weave to hold to.

she also starting perming her daughter's hair at a young age. she does have problems with self esteem. which is too bad because she an attractive women. i've seen pictures of her with a short hairdo and her beauty really came out in those pictures.

she has a notion and one that has some basis, that attractive people are more successful. she passed her euro beliefs and standards of beauty and passed them on to her daughter. the weave it like her security blanket.

also, little girls do see images and do want the long, flowing hair. it not always the parents idea. yes, it's up to the parents and people around them to help them develop a sense of pride in their own look and individuality.

i'm like you Nia, i too have always gone against the grain, done my own thang, had my own thoughts. but you know, i think the problems that occured between me and some of my cousins as a result of my hair, probably has something to do with my choice of styles. don't let someone tell me how long my hair is getting, i'm like, "oh, it must be time to get a haircut."

i cut my locks off about a year ago. people couldn't believe i would cut my hair off since it had gotten so long. people wonder what i'm gonna do now with my 4 inch afro. i tell them, i'm not gonna do anything with it but keep it natural. when i work in the schools, this is my way of showing our young people that you can still be and feel beautfiul without a hairweave.

here's another thing, i would get lots of compliments from young girls when i had dreadlocks. i had an aunt that actually liked my locks. she cringed when i first brought up the issue of growing dreads. every time she visited, she would ask, so you have to cut those when you don't want them anymore. "yep". this is the mother of the cousin i spoke of. she too has been known to buy a wig to cover up her damaged hair.
 
the beauty is within the hair self is born with
no weave to be mend forth a child will be
damage it's sad to see it as it takes the real beauty away
yes it's signs of self hate to what GOD gave u and made u to be
 
Falseness takes away the real beauty, yes

...you are so right, $$RICH$$.

And when folk ask me if "you have to cut them off" to "get them out", I always look at them for a moment, then ask them what would make them think I would ever WANT to "get them out". Because the automatic ***-sumption from the majority is that I will eventually want to "get rid of" them. When children (18 and under) ask me how "you get them out", I simply say, "you don't". And because they have been brainwashed into thinking the whole thing is a trend for everyone, they cannot believe my response. Good point about the hairweave being a security blanket.
 
Nia ... get what out? You lost me (not a difficult thing to do) :)

In regard to your original question, I think it's so important to reinforce a child's beauty and self-esteem based on what and who they really are. A child at 10 years old, already being taught that what they have naturally is not good enough ... gosh ... how can they ever grow up to be sure and proud of who they are. I think it's a mistake to add stuff to their core being, stuff that costs money for them to maintain, stuff that focuses only on the outside (as though that's the most important), providing no real sustenance to their inner self ... as a matter of fact ... detracting and or teaching them to never be satisfied with what God gave them ... just giving them issues that if they are strong enough, one day they'll have to overcome.

Children have enough issues as is ...

:heart:

Destee
 

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