Black Poetry : thoughts stream

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by deepy, Aug 16, 2004.

  1. deepy

    deepy going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2003
    Messages:
    2,845
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    nyc
    Ratings:
    +43
    I
    a moist warm august day
    she wore winter coats, sweaters,skirts
    and scarves
    hairs of many diffrent styles
    all rusts and blacks..
    chin held high
    knowing eyes
    maintaining...
    pride
    we close our eyes

    II
    2 AM and urine fecund smells abound
    in airless dungeon
    ashen faces...browning hues
    frowning
    in my mouth and eyes
    stopped air
    keeping smells alive...
    alive - oh ..oh...o
    ah...ah...
    the train

    III
    thoughts stream
    poems be
    spirits live
    song is
    music
    sounds of man
    man is sound
    music is nature
    man is nature
    all is
    NATURE AL
    nature-ally
     
  2. Khasm13

    Khasm13 STAFF STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2003
    Messages:
    10,784
    Likes Received:
    4,235
    Gender:
    Male
    Ratings:
    +4,472
    yo...i've been on that pissy train with you sis....
    you conjured up some potent images...
    i like the last word...nature-ally
    very deep...
    one love
    khasm
     
  3. MzBlkAngel

    MzBlkAngel Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2003
    Messages:
    12,660
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    somewhere ova da rainbow....
    Ratings:
    +219
    this was a tight lay
    posed well..
    i can feel ya on dis as well
    Peace
    Angel
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    This brought me back to the days when I used to take the train daily, and my mind was flooded with so many rich images that imprinted my mind. Loved where this took me sis.
     
  5. deepy

    deepy going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2003
    Messages:
    2,845
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    nyc
    Ratings:
    +43
    thanks yawl...for remembering...
    don't know if that's always a good thing
    but it definitely keeps one real..
     
  6. gempis

    gempis Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    May 5, 2003
    Messages:
    4,020
    Likes Received:
    32
    Occupation:
    strength coach
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Ratings:
    +32
    Oh you painted a vivid picture and laid out those scenes. So good, so very good this piece.
     
  7. deepy

    deepy going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2003
    Messages:
    2,845
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    nyc
    Ratings:
    +43
    i appreciate it gempis...appreciate you
     
Loading...