Black Relationships : The interracial dating disparity

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Sethervex, May 3, 2005.

  1. Sethervex

    Sethervex Banned MEMBER

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    I know that most black women are very well aware of the interracial dating disparity between black women and black men. But do black women realize the repercussions of this disparity? I’m sure many black women have heard the line, “Stop worrying about the black men who only date white women, and focus on the black men who will date black women”. But this line of thinking results a large number of women focusing on a much fewer number of men, and as we will see, this also creates problems. The following example is both a simplification, and exaggeration to better illustrate the dating dynamics between men and women.

    Imagine if there were 5 single men and 5 single women stuck on an island. The relative social worth of men and women would be about equal, as there would be no extra demand for men or women. Neither men, nor women would have the upper hand in relationships.

    Now imagine if there were 8 men and 2 women. The social dynamics would be greatly different. The women would be in great demand, and would have a huge upper-hand in social relationships. Women could basically have requirements, make demands, and make men jump through hoops in order to compete.

    Now imagine if there were 6 men and 4 women. While the advantage for women would not be as extreme as in the previous example, the same dynamics are still in effect, and women would still have the upper hand. Keep these examples in mind.

    I have heard that as many as 35-40% of black men date interracially, while only about 2% of black women do. This leaves 60-65% of black men who do NOT date interracially, and 98% of black women who do NOT date interracially. This means that 98% of black women are competing for 60-65% of black men. This is where the island example comes in. While this imbalance is not as extreme as the island example, the same dynamics are still at work. Black men have a huge advantage in relationships with black women, and can pretty much make demands, and call the shots.

    And to compound this issue, the entertainment industry’s portrayals of black men, and black women have increased this gap in social standing. Black men are increasingly being portrayed as “strong, manly, and handsome”. In other words, black men are often portrayed as “Alpha Males”. By comparison, black women are rarely if ever portrayed as “Alpha Females”. And to make matters worse, when black women ARE portrayed as beautiful, and desirable, they are usually half WHITE or look half white.

    Also, black men enjoy much more representation in the entertainment industry than black women. While there have been many studies regarding the under-representation of blacks in the leading roles in movies, it is never broken down by gender. If it was, we would see that yes, black women are indeed under-represented, but black males are actually OVER-represented. So while complaints from the black community bemoan the under-representation of black people in the entertainment industry, more and more roles are being offered to blacks. But these roles seem to be only offered to black MEN, not black women. Think of all of the movies that have come out in the last few years with black males as lead characters. Now compare the number of movies that have black women as lead characters. The gap is very obvious.

    My point in all of this is that the social acceptance that black men have begun to enjoy in recent years does not necessarily benefit black women. It should be pointed out that black WOMEN in the media are still under-represented and disrespected in general. Also, the interracial dating disparity will continue to put black women at a disadvantage, and the only way to decrease this disparity is for black women to become more open-minded about dating men of other races. Keep in mind that while stereotypes regarding black women aren’t true, stereotypes regarding men of other races are also not true.
     
  2. kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Here we go again.
     
  3. Sekhemu

    Sekhemu Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You're absolutely right Kente, here we go again! why to some negroes insist on coming to this website trying to convince us that going outside of our race is the solution to our problems. It's as if they think there is a mass exodus black men running to the waiting arms of white, latin and asian women. Give me a D@*n break.
     
  4. Sethervex

    Sethervex Banned MEMBER

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    If you disagree with my argument, then why not address the issue in question rather than putting words into my mouth? I never said there is a "mass exodus of black men running to the waiting arms of white, latin and asian women." I merely provided some statistics, that from my observation are quite accurate.

    I also gave a very simple example of supply and demand and how it relates to the social dynamics between men and women. Apperently, you do not understand this concept. Or perhaps you're a black male who DOES understand this concept, but don't want to give up your advantage.

    And regarding your comment about going outside of your race, if more black women went outside of their race, the IR disparity WOULD diminish, and the social gap WOULD decrease. It's a simple matter of supply and demand.

    You just sound as if you LIKE the fact that black men have all of the leverage in relationships with black women. You have also failed to address the issue of black women being under-represented in the entertainment industry, and generally being overlooked.
     
  5. jamesfrmphilly

    jamesfrmphilly going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    one mo time.

    40 percent of black me do not date IR.
    you are wrong.

    i don't think any do on this site.
    you are irrelevant.

    you keep coming back with the same old s$$$$t
    you are irrational.

    let it rest my friend.
     
  6. kente417mojo

    kente417mojo Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    What planet do you live on where black men have all the leverage in relationships with black women?
     
  7. Sekhemu

    Sekhemu Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I addressed your alleged statistics as I saw fit to do so. This ridiculous argument has been rehashed, time and time again. Every single perspective with respect to this issues has been thoroughly articulated, with the same results. So please tell the family what it is that you can offer, more enlightening than what has already been said? In fact why are you bringing this up on a website designed to bring black people together, rather than look at "options" from outside our race?
     
  8. Sekhemu

    Sekhemu Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    "Black men have all the leverage in a relationship" if that's not a cop out and self-defeatest attitude, I don't know what one is. You sound like you like being a victim.
     
  9. Sethervex

    Sethervex Banned MEMBER

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    Are you saying there ISN'T a huge interracial dating disparity? Because, if so, we all know that is a lie. And are you saying that the law of supply and demand is just a lie? It has been proven true for generations.

    And my argument is totally rational.
     
  10. Sekhemu

    Sekhemu Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    It's called planet Fantasy Island
     
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