Spicy Brown

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OmowaleX said:
Sister Destee,

In further reflection, what DOES offend me is when a "moderator" refers to ME as a "kneegrow". Do you what what being called a "kneegrow" implies?

Do YOU, Destee, find this reference "offensive"? What would your response be if I referred to YOU as a "kneegrow"?

Furthermore, is this okay...for a "moderator" to refer to a "family" member as a "kneegrow"?

If you SEE nothing wrong with this then would it be okay if I refreed to a female member as a "kneegress"?

Someone was banned yesterday after referring to ME as an "uncle tom#2". What is the difference between being called an "uncle tom" and/or a "kneegrow"? Dont these basically have the SAME meaning??!

So, one member get banned after calling ME an "uncle tom" while a "moderator", you SEE nothing wrong after calling ME a "kneegrow"?


Sorry, I DONT GET IT!

Seems like double standards to ME.


OM.

Brother O ... i'm so tired of feeling like i have to babysit grown men and women.

You posted this complaint about Sister Spicy, referring to you as a weak man, kneegrow, etc., but you aint mentioning the fact that you referred to her as a hoodrat, and probably other things ... that she believes is a lie, and would be more than willing to call you the same liar, that you are calling her.

You fuel the fire that exists between the two of you ... both of you do ... and then you want to cry foul.

You're both guilty. You both are old enough to recognize that if you can't get along with each other, you should avoid speaking to each other. You wouldn't be the first in the community that had to do this. Putting me in a position to babysit yall, is just ridiculous.

There's been no real rule violation, none that i couldn't apply to both of you equally. You both are being disruptive, argumentative, and all that stuff. Now you want me to split hairs, and find who started it first, who said what first, blah blah blah! Oh My Gosh. I just don't have the patience for this anymore. I'm gett'n old. I'm expecting adult behavior, from adults. I'm expecting for grown adult men and women to recognize for themselves, that it's best to limit contact with some individuals, and focus on those who they have positive interactions with.

I feel like i'm in an elementary school yard, breaking children up from fighting with each other. Each one says, they hit me first! You both are acting very juvenile, in my opinion. So what if someone else says something you don't like. Skip it. Let it go. So what. Let that be an indication that you want to steer clear of that person, instead, you both go jumping in head first, into what you claim offends you so. It just doesn't add up to me. You both should know better.

Now, Sister Spicy is a Moderator and held to a higher standard. But i can't stop yall from fighting with each other, if it's what you're both bound and determined to do ... especially when each of you carefully stay within the rules, easing in and out of them just enough for me not to be able to really count it (when considering your entire contributions in this community). Even though Sister Spicy is a Moderator, she's a relatively new one, and deserving of time to grow to the place that i believe she'll get to. In addition, when someone begins talking about each other's husbands, wives, Family, all bets are off. Forget being a Moderator, they are going to want to respond to such, as would anyone ... (though i do expect her to contain herself, as best she can).

Yall are playing with each other's Families, using them as pawns and weapons in your fights, and then you want me to come in and ... do what?! What am i suppose to do with this, when yall don't have the wherewithal to steer clear of it?

For the record, no, the word Negro does not offend me, nor does Negress. I've been called both in the community, and other Members got mad at me, for not getting offended. I don't have the level of sensitivity, i suppose, that some people do. The way i figure it, God gave everyone a mouth, to say whatever they please. Who am i to stop them from doing what God has allowed, even if it is about me. So what. I have had more opportunities than i can count, to go on and on about what someone else said about me ... but putting my energy in those places does nothing for the collective good of my people. I'm on some different stuff, and i just don't have time for that. If i don't have time to deal with folk talking about me, i really aint got no whole bunch of time, to deal with what folk say about someone else ... especially grown folk that know better, and are willingly participating and fueling such foolishness.

Brother O ... you also 'suggested' that if i did not make certain management changes, you'd do this, that, and the other. Well, let me tell you. I will not be controlled in this manner. I'm going to do what i feel is best, as it relates to the management of this community, and i'm really shocked that you'd issue such an ultimatum to me. I've never given you or anyone the impression (i don't believe), that Premium Membership entitles you to tell me what to do. I've been managing this community for 10 years, and while i'm open to all suggestions for improvement, i will not respond positively to demands such as this.

Who becomes a Moderator in this community, and remains a Moderator, has always been (ultimately) my and their decision. I'm not about to relinquish that to you or anyone.

I really don't know what else to say to this.

I don't see a rule violation. What i see are two valuable Members, willingly giving each other lots of attention.

Again, Moderators are held to a higher standard. I will talk with Sister Spicy about her behavior. I feel confident saying, that she will steer clear of you. If this is sufficient, i'd hope that you'd not speak to her again either. I believe this can solve the problem.

Much Love and Peace.

:heart:

Destee
 
yea

that sexybrown um i meant that spicybrown does have alot of fight in her don't she?

I don't see a rule violation. What i see are two valuable Members, willingly giving each other lots of attention.


lol
 
Destee said:
Brother O ... i'm so tired of feeling like i have to babysit grown men and women.

You posted this complaint about Sister Spicy, referring to you as a weak man, kneegrow, etc., but you aint mentioning the fact that you referred to her as a hoodrat, and probably other things ... that she believes is a lie, and would be more than willing to call you the same liar, that you are calling her.

You fuel the fire that exists between the two of you ... both of you do ... and then you want to cry foul.

You're both guilty. You both are old enough to recognize that if you can't get along with each other, you should avoid speaking to each other. You wouldn't be the first in the community that had to do this. Putting me in a position to babysit yall, is just ridiculous.

There's been no real rule violation, none that i couldn't apply to both of you equally. You both are being disruptive, argumentative, and all that stuff. Now you want me to split hairs, and find who started it first, who said what first, blah blah blah! Oh My Gosh. I just don't have the patience for this anymore. I'm gett'n old. I'm expecting adult behavior, from adults. I'm expecting for grown adult men and women to recognize for themselves, that it's best to limit contact with some individuals, and focus on those who they have positive interactions with.

I feel like i'm in an elementary school yard, breaking children up from fighting with each other. Each one says, they hit me first! You both are acting very juvenile, in my opinion. So what if someone else says something you don't like. Skip it. Let it go. So what. Let that be an indication that you want to steer clear of that person, instead, you both go jumping in head first, into what you claim offends you so. It just doesn't add up to me. You both should know better.

Now, Sister Spicy is a Moderator and held to a higher standard. But i can't stop yall from fighting with each other, if it's what you're both bound and determined to do ... especially when each of you carefully stay within the rules, easing in and out of them just enough for me not to be able to really count it (when considering your entire contributions in this community). Even though Sister Spicy is a Moderator, she's a relatively new one, and deserving of time to grow to the place that i believe she'll get to. In addition, when someone begins talking about each other's husbands, wives, Family, all bets are off. Forget being a Moderator, they are going to want to respond to such, as would anyone ... (though i do expect her to contain herself, as best she can).

Yall are playing with each other's Families, using them as pawns and weapons in your fights, and then you want me to come in and ... do what?! What am i suppose to do with this, when yall don't have the wherewithal to steer clear of it?

For the record, no, the word Negro does not offend me, nor does Negress. I've been called both in the community, and other Members got mad at me, for not getting offended. I don't have the level of sensitivity, i suppose, that some people do. The way i figure it, God gave everyone a mouth, to say whatever they please. Who am i to stop them from doing what God has allowed, even if it is about me. So what. I have had more opportunities than i can count, to go on and on about what someone else said about me ... but putting my energy in those places does nothing for the collective good of my people. I'm on some different stuff, and i just don't have time for that. If i don't have time to deal with folk talking about me, i really aint got no whole bunch of time, to deal with what folk say about someone else ... especially grown folk that know better, and are willingly participating and fueling such foolishness.

Brother O ... you also 'suggested' that if i did not make certain management changes, you'd do this, that, and the other. Well, let me tell you. I will not be controlled in this manner. I'm going to do what i feel is best, as it relates to the management of this community, and i'm really shocked that you'd issue such an ultimatum to me. I've never given you or anyone the impression (i don't believe), that Premium Membership entitles you to tell me what to do. I've been managing this community for 10 years, and while i'm open to all suggestions for improvement, i will not respond positively to demands such as this.

Who becomes a Moderator in this community, and remains a Moderator, has always been (ultimately) my and their decision. I'm not about to relinquish that to you or anyone.

I really don't know what else to say to this.

I don't see a rule violation. What i see are two valuable Members, willingly giving each other lots of attention.

Again, Moderators are held to a higher standard. I will talk with Sister Spicy about her behavior. I feel confident saying, that she will steer clear of you. If this is sufficient, i'd hope that you'd not speak to her again either. I believe this can solve the problem.

Much Love and Peace.

:heart:

Destee

Sister Destee,

You will no longer have to concern yourself with "babysitting" me.

How condescending!

YOU are the one who suggested I file a complaint if I had one, which I did.

Since you now equate my voicing my concerns with being a "CHILD" involved in a "SCHOOLYARD" fight, again, I must assume that you SEE no problem with one of your moderators referreing to me, or any other member as a KNEEGROW.

if this is what is meant by "respect" in THIS "house"...

Oh well.......
 
OmowaleX said:
Sister Destee,

You will no longer have to concern yourself with "babysitting" me.

How condescending!

YOU are the one who suggested I file a complaint if I had one, which I did.

Since you now equate my voicing my concerns with being a "CHILD" involved in a "SCHOOLYARD" fight, again, I must assume that you SEE no problem with one of your moderators referreing to me, or any other member as a KNEEGROW.

if this is what is meant by "respect" in THIS "house"...

Oh well.......

Brother O ... you're doing the same stuff she's doing. Both of you are going back and forth with each other. Both of you have said, what could easily be considered to the other ... offensive stuff.

You posted a thread to me, to review, that was posted AFTER your initial Sister Destee thread was posted. Sister Spicy was obviously responding, because she and you knew, that yall were talking about each other. I didn't have a clue! You didn't post anything that happened PRIOR to the Sister Destee thread, for me to review. So it's as though, it all happened as a result of that Sister Destee thread?!!!

Yes, as soon as i saw your thread, i asked for evidence of the violation, but the evidence you provided was posted AFTER i asked for evidence?!!! You have yet to present a violation by Sister Spicy, that happened before you posted your original complaint thread.

I'm sorry. I can't read minds, i can't keep up with yall, and i can't keep you from attacking each other (as you both skirt the edges of the rules quite successfully).

No ... i don't find Negro offensive, and i don't know of any different meaning, just because the word is spelled differently.

With so many Sisters and Brothers in this community that love, respect, and want you here, i just don't understand why you insist on focusing on those that you don't get along with.

At some point, we are all responsible for what we become involved in and with.

Some of this is your own choice Brother O ... as you have given her as much of your attention, as she gives you.

Again ... i'm sorry that you don't like my response, but that's what i see, based on the evidence you've presented.

:heart:

Destee
 
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