Black Jokes Humor : southern zodiac signs

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by DivaWithTude, Jan 8, 2005.

  1. DivaWithTude

    DivaWithTude Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    OKRA (Dec 22 - Jan 20)
    >Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on the inside.
    >Okras have tremendous influence. An older Okra can look back over his
    >life and see the seeds of his influence everywhere. Stay away from Moon
    >Pies.
    >
    >CHITLIN (Jan 21 - Feb 19)
    >Chitlins come from humble backgrounds. A chitlin, however, can make
    >something of himself if he's motivated and has lots of seasoning. In
    >dealing with Chitlins, be careful. They can erupt like Vesuvius.
    >Chitlins are best with Catfish and Okra.
    >
    >BOLL WEEVIL (Feb 20 - Mar 20)
    >You have an overwhelming curiosity. You're unsatisfied with the surface
    >of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior of
    >everything. Needless to say, you are very intense and driven as if you
    >had some inner hunger. Nobody in their right mind is going to marry you,
    >so don't worry about it.
    >
    >MOON PIE (Mar 21 - Apr 20)
    >You're the type that spends a lot of time on the front porch. It's a
    >cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon Pies. Big and round
    >are the key words here. You should marry anybody who you can get
    >remotely interested in the idea. It's not going to be easy. This might
    >be the year to think about aerobics. Or - maybe not.
    >
    >POSSUM (Apr 21 - May 21)
    >When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked tendency
    >to withdraw and develop a don't-bother-me-about-it attitude. Sometimes
    >you become so withdrawn, people actually think you're dead. This
    >strategy is probably not psychologically healthy, but seems to work for
    >you. One day, however, it won't work and you may find your problems
    >actually running you over.
    >
    >CRAWFISH (May 22 - June 21)
    >Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you're always
    >hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the
    >mountains, the pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living room.
    >You tend to be not particularly attractive physically, but you have
    >very, very good heads.
    >
    >COLLARDS (June 22 - July 23)
    >Collards have a genius for communication. They love to get in the
    >"melting pot" of life and share their essence with the essence of those
    >round them. Collards make good social workers, psychologists, and
    >baseball managers. As far as your personal life goes, if you are
    >Collards, stay away from Moon Pies. It just won't work. Save yourself a
    >lot of heartache.
    >
    >CATFISH (July 24 - Aug 23)
    >Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, although one
    >whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You catfish are never easy
    >people to understand. You prefer the muddy bottoms to the clear surface
    >of life. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from Moon Pies.
    >
    >GRITS (Aug 24 - Sept 23)
    >Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You like to huddle
    >together with a big crowd of other Grits. You love to travel though, so
    >maybe you should think about joining a club. Where do you like to go?
    >Anywhere they have cheese or gravy or bacon or butter or eggs. If you
    >can go somewhere where they have all these things, that serves you well.
    >
    >BOILED PEANUTS (Sept 24 - Oct 23)
    >You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately,
    >those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find that
    >your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will probably
    >affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear.
    >You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in a
    >certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of life, you can be
    >sure that people will always pull over and stop for you.
    >
    >BUTTER BEAN (Oct 24 - Nov 22)
    >Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well with
    >everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown on the
    >vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You can
    >sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything to do
    >with Moon Pies.
    >
    >ARMADILLO (Nov 23 - Dec 21)
    >You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you are actually
    >quite gentle. A good evening for you? Old friends, a fire, some roots,
    >fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're not concerned with
    >today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned with anything about
    >today. You're really almost prehistoric in your interests and behavior
    >patterns. You probably want to marry another Armadillo, but Possum is
    >another somewhat kinky, mating possibility.
     
  2. PurpleMoons

    PurpleMoons Administrator STAFF

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    LOL This is funny and interesting! LOL
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    very different but funny and to think i'm a crawfish lol
     
  4. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This here sho was witty, lol. I'm a catfish....I guess anything beats being a moon pie, they don't seem to get any love...lol. (Corn ball aside, maybe a moon pie can hook up with a couch potato, I know they are not on the list, but hey, they appear to be related, so hey, why not? lol)
     
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