Black Relationships : Sisters Suddenly Want a Guy Like Barack???

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by Kemetstry, Jul 5, 2009.

  1. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Women seeking: A man like Barack Obama

    Have you found your Barack? President is new code for Prince Charming
    Obama has touched a nerve among black women in particular, who consider him an IBM (Ideal Black Man) — educated, eloquent, tall, attractive, family oriented, ambitious and down to earth.
    View related photos
    Mark Wilson / EPA file


    By Megan K. Scott


    updated 4:37 p.m. ET, Wed., June 17, 2009
    NEW YORK - Monica Weeks has met many men, but at age 51 she says she still hasn't found her "Barack."

    Among Weeks and her friends, President Barack Obama's name has become shorthand for a black man with integrity, character and spirituality, one who loves and values his wife and makes his family a priority — in other words, the kind of man that many black women had despaired of finding.

    Weeks said probably every single woman she knows is looking for her "Barack."

    "He absolutely makes me think it's attainable," said Weeks, a divorced mom in Somerset, N.J. "For women who are older and seeking a man, I think we can look at him and say, 'All is not lost.'"

    The story is the same elsewhere among black women, who say the new code word for Prince Charming has become so commonplace that they have been asked "Have you found your Barack?" or told others "I'm looking for my Barack."

    Obama's sex appeal hasn't hurt — what other president would get high marks in a swimsuit competition? But he has touched a nerve among black women in particular, who consider him an IBM (Ideal Black Man) — educated, eloquent, tall, attractive, family oriented, ambitious and down to earth

    A good man is hard to find
    For years, single black women have been commiserating about the perceived shortage of eligible black men. It's laughed about in movies ("Waiting to Exhale") and backed up with statistics: The May unemployment rate for black men was 16.8 percent for those ages 20 and older, compared to a national rate of 9.8 percent for all adult men. Black women outnumber black men almost 2-to-1 on college campuses. Most black babies are born to unwed mothers.

    Click here for entire article--->http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31412631/ns/today_relationships/?ocid=twitter
     
  2. Jahari Kavi

    Jahari Kavi Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    in the words of eddie griffin....."what happened to the days where a sister would just fall in love wit a n**** wit a bus pass???"
     
  3. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    :toast:


    LMAO

    Looong gone apparently. But at least they are looking at us again. The guy with the bus pass may be some struggling future president

    :em2300:















     
  4. snugli360

    snugli360 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    SNUGLI360

    I AM SPEAKING FOR MANY OF WOMEN BY NATURE THEN BY EXPERIENCE.I LOVE MY BLACK MAN,DO BLACK MEN LOVE THEMSELVES? THIS IS A FIRST FOR ME TO HEAR THAT BLACK WOMEN ARE LOOKING FOR A BARACK MAN. LET ME SPEAK FOR ME AS A WOMAN.I AM A HUMBLE WOMAN HAVE DATED VARIOUS MEN, IN SO DOING HAVE FOUND THAT YOU CAN DATE A BLACK MAN WHEN HE IS DOWN BEING THE STRENGHT THAT HE NEEDS WHILE HE STRUGGLES ONCE THINGS LOOK UP HE'S OUT THE DOOR WITH SOMEONE ELSE BE IT A DIFFERENT RACE. US WOMEN GO THROUGH SO MUCH TRYING TO BE THAT LOVE AND SUPPORT FOR HER MAN WHEN HE OBTAIN HIS GOALS SHE IS SOMETIMES LEFT ALONE WHILE HE GOES AND LIVE THE GOOD LIFE WITH SOMEONE ELSE THAT WASN'T THERE TO CONSOLE HIM WHEN HE FELT LESS OF A MAN CAUSE HE DIDN'T HAVE ANY MONEY,SELF ESTEEM,LITERACY,ETC WE AS WOMEN HAVE BEEN DEALT OUR FAIR SHARE OF CARDS TRYING TO BE UNDERSTANDING TO BROTHERS AND THE STRUGGLE.I DON'T BLAME BLACK WOMEN FOR SETTING STANDARDS OF WHAT THEIR IDEAL MAN MUST MEASURE UP TO BE.
     
  5. mizjoice

    mizjoice Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    i feel you snugli360, and I did read the article. I don't feel that black women are looking specifically for their 'Barack', at least, not specifically equipped with the attributes that were described. (A brother with a bus card can still get some play!) The quality that Barack displays that I would love to see more evident in Black Relationships is his obvious love for his wife. Barack is in love with Michelle, doesn't mind holding her hand (anywhere), makes no bones about the fact that that is his woman, his lover, his wife. He don't care where they are, or who's around--it's something just electric between them, that you can plainly see. I can't speck for other black women, but for me, that is just so cool!!!!

    To my sistah Snugli, quiet as it is kept, there are probably some brothers looking for their 'Michelle'. What I mean by that is Michelle was going on about her life when she met Barack. She had her own education, her own career, her own stuff going on. My aunt used to say, "teach a man a,b,c.........he won't be back until he needs to learn d,e,f." (My brothers: don't lynch me--like I said, my aunt used to say that!) Sometimes we can support the aspirations of others without supporting our own dreams and aspirations--that is usually a bad move. If like attracts like, become who you wish to attract, and he (or she) will surely come. It seems to have happened for the Obama's, and I like to believe it can happen for any of the rest of us.
     
  6. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    *sigh*


    :whip:

    :bully:

    :court:

    :flamet:

    Over 95% of all BM mate with BW.

    I cant begin to tell you how wrong you are on this. Date real black men

    :10500:






















    ;
     
  7. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    So, there are a lot of Michelles out there huh?

    My question is, why are you guys dating males that have a problem showing they love you? Have you forgotten how to say no, en masse? Maybe that's the real problem here.

    I know plenty of guys like Barack. How many of you with Michelles background, truly would have went out with him?


    :em0200:





     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2015
  8. KWABENA

    KWABENA STAFF STAFF

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    You know - I was reading a thread from awhile back this morning (forgot the name of it), and I had the same question after that thread as I do this one...

    Why can we not build our relationships without identifying/comparing our brothas/sistahs with some well-known person? No wonder there are so-called "self-esteem" issues among people en masse. For example (in this case), now a brotha must be like "Barack" to suggest he's a "good catch." Now a sistah must be "michelle"-like to be worth value. Why can we not just take each other for who we are? Everyone is welcome to disprove me for saying this, but do you know how that affects a man's ego when he is described as "looking like [say] Grant Hill" or somebody who stepped out of a GQ Magazine cover rather than having his own features and characteristics? This type of thinking is killing our people, and heaven knows how much damage it is doing to our young people.

    Should we stop basing our selection of each other solely on looks? Personally and certainly I wish so, but not really. After all we have free will, and have the freedom to choose however we want to choose. Then again, I feel that we should formulate the habit of taking each other for who we are, and not place them in a mental database of comparison(s). Go ahead and select brothas based on how they compare to "Barack," and let's see where this leads us.

    KWABENA
     
  9. Jahari Kavi

    Jahari Kavi Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    DING, DING, DING.....SOMEONE TELL THIS MAN WHAT HE WON!!!!
     
  10. mizjoice

    mizjoice Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    All good questions, Bro Kem. Unfortunately, women (black and otherwise) have a tendency to date men who TELL them they love them, instead of SHOWING them they love them. That can be considered a life lesson, or growing pain, and will continue until we (as women) learn better.

    And the real problem might not be that women, en masse, have forgotten to say no. The real problem might be that men (not all) tend to lie about their emotions in the pursuit of a sex life. ("Uh, yeah, baby, sure I love you" "sure, I'll respect you tomorrow, just take off your dress." "I promise, I won't go no further......." etc.) Reference paragraph above! Men might be surprised, but some woman can handle the raw truth, and don't want to be lead down a primrose path. Don't ask for love when you want sex, and vice versa. Either path is disaster.

    I can't speak for all women, I never settled for the "Barack" cause, I was no "Michelle"--and I figured as soon as dude saw the warts on my butt he'd be out of there. I settled for a ruff-neck, OG, ('fa real) round-the-hood Black Man. Yeah, he has his flaws, but hey, so do I.

    My Hero? More than that--My King!! Dealt with my teenage daughter, all that comes with that, my bad choices (some really bad!!) jail sentences (his and mine!) Within 13 years, that dude left my presence, but not my heart.

    He's outside now, barbequing. He'll tell anyone he loves me, without reservation, and shout it from that Hoverround!!!! I'll tell anyone the very same about him. Now Dig that!!

    To paraphrase Bro Kwabena, I might not have a Barack, but mine is the one for me--without a doubt.

























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