Poetry Critiques : Sinful indiscretions


New Member
May 9, 2008
hello all....
this is the very first time that I have ever shared any of my writing...needless to say i am very nervous....Please, be honest. There is always room for improvement.

Sinful indiscretions
When his lips touched mine, it was all
His hands searched my body for a treasure that was unknown to me
F****** him was a humbling experience
From rubbing my body down with oil
To sucking my syrup covered breast
Exploring me
Memorizing every crease and fold
I was lost in
Sensations of pleasure
Wanting to feel him
Wanting to feel his stroke
Let him inflict
Onto my body
Pushing himself
Inside of me
Past my
Past my
And bringing me to a point
Of no return
Exposing my body
To depths of pleasure that I was unaware of
Forcing me to look him in the eye
Showcasing my
Letting him know he was in control
Directing my body to do as he pleased
“Let me in. Indulge in my sin”
Thrusting deeper
And as each tear
Her regains his strength
Licks my tears
Chills race through my body
And I am in sexual shock.
Greetings LeeStone and

Thanks for Sharing!

SiS Lee...The memories of HIM you done stirred up in me...
When I THINK of Him....

I was feeling every stroke
How all my fragile barriers broke
Sending out a steamy hot mix
Drawing me to him as he hollered

Cum Quick

I'm gonna take you on the trip of your life
Come on girl, don't put up no fight
In the dark, your eyes bright, showing a whole lotta white

At first I frowned
Was afraid I'd dance
like the clown
when a man know how to throw it down

Causing me to cream
while at the same time I Scream

Oh Baby Hell...

I'm Cummmmmmmmming
wit u...
Sinfully Indiscreet
come along honey...let me beat that meat

I'm ready for one to quell some of dis heat
Fill me till I'm complete~ly
drenched...come on..
I'll be your bedside wrench
engaging in sinful delights


I like it like dat:em0400:

It's normal to be nervous the first time you share, we've all been there. I take it that it was your intent to let us into the details of a sensually charged romp... Well then poet, mission very well accomplished!
Welcome to Destee.com. Please aquaint yourself with our Forum Rules, as well as our rules of Poetic Etiquette. Continue to make yourself at home, because you are. :)

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