Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by daroc, Jun 13, 2004.
simple question that may bring a complex answer...
when u dont say no..are u simply saying yes?
Could you explain in more detail please because I'm not sure exactly the kind of responses you are lQQking for.
Give us an example or something to help us better understand.
for example if u dont condone sex- does that mean that u promote it?
or if u dont give permission to do something( if u dont say no)- does that mean that u said yes?
im not really looking for a complex answer- jus a yes or no- what first comes to mind ... nothing more i guess
hope that helps
I've heard it said that silence is often a sign of consent and it does make you wonder whether that's true or not. When people don't speak up and out about issues--either in favor of or against--it tends to send a message that you don't care either way. Voting for instance...might be an example of how not casting a vote against something will only serve to open the door for that which you may be against to take place.
My humble thoughts...
I think there are people in the world who say nothing simply because they know not what to say. For some people, not answering at all is their way of saying "This has nothing to do with me." If I don't agree with something, I usually speak up about it. However, I must respect another's opinion/conviction. If they say "blue" and I say "turquoise,"... am I right or wrong when I keep silent because I think they are wrong?
Sister Toylin, you make some good points however, because we might see things differently doesn't mean that I'm right and you're wrong. At least that's how I view things. Many times, people only know what they know and until someone sheds a different perspective, they will remain locked into only what they know.
Sure there are times when remaining silent won't influence the outcome of a situation. Some situations aren't even worth commenting on. But one must always weigh the importance of the situation and determine whether being silent or speaking up is not only warranted but highly crucial. If you see turquoise and I see blue...what does it really matter to debate about that? But if you support Sen. Kerry and I support Bush, you're silent about your choice and I'm vocal about mine, then I think that's a different story.
What you think?
I agree, sister... The point I was aiming for goes something like this:
When is it right to say I'm right? When is it right to say I'm wrong? And when does it benefit both of us for me to remain silent?
To use your Kerry/Bush example.... Say you're pro-Bush..... And I'm not. Does that automatically mean I'm pro-Kerry? And could I not care either way, and be pro-Nader? There is a tricky thing called middle of the road.. I believe in politics they're called moderates. If I remain silent on an issue, it doesn't necessarily mean that I believe the same or the opposite of what you do, true?
*disclaimer* Again, this is all for the sake of the arguement........... Perosnally, I didn't vote for Bush in the first place.
Following up your scenario, during a discussion among pro-Bush people, you stand by and say nothing. Could these people then ASSUME that you are a supporter of Bush too? Yes they could and most likely this is what would happen. Say, down the road the group wants to participate in a pro-Bush rally and invite you to come along and you decline and let them know now that you don't support Bush. They are shocked and appalled at you now telling them this when your silence earlier led them to believe that you supported him. Did they have a right to make these assumptions? No. Does that make you wrong for not telling them sooner? No. Given this scenario, what lesson can we learned about making assumptions? Never do it. Could we learn something as well about speaking up on issues when you have the opportunity to do so? More often than not, it might teach us the value of open and honest communication and how critical timing is when we offer our opinions. To speak after the fact, many times does people no good. Hindsight can be good but foresight can be even better.
thank you ladies for all the help and wise angles... i guess i was jus wondering if yes and no are so black and white as some people make them seem....thanks again
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