Black Relationships : Should Men Pay For Dates?

[Liberty]

Nothing of what you have mentioned that you feel women supply are significantly important in my opinion. All of that can be easily acquired through the purchase of goods and services. Want your home to look a certain way, hire a home decorator. Want your clothing to look great on you, go to a reputable tailor. Want your appliances installed or fixed, purchase the service. The only two things on your list that can not be easily purchased are protect and provide (though protection can be purchased once you have significant financial resources).

Really, having any of those items mentioned above as being important to a relationship seems quite shallow to me. I may be wrong, but I get the impression that much of what you consider important about what feminine energy can supply can be easily purchased with money. What can be supplied by masculine energy can also easily be acquired with money or done for ones-self. Can you supply some deeper less easily acquired through financial means explanation for what those two energies you have mentioned can supply to each other?

I can give you a short list of the things I find important.

1. Emotional, Physical, and Intellectual support for each other. Help keep each other focused on our goals. To be cheerleaders, counselors, helpmates, and lovers to each other.

2. A shared vision of parenting to help raise children into well adjusted adults.

3. A desire to grow together in knowledge about each other and the rest of reality. (Talking, Playing, Traveling, Experiencing life)

The point I was making flew right over your head. And, now you are off on an unrelated tangent.

 

[Hermetic]

The point I was making flew right over your head. And, now you are off on an unrelated tangent.

I understood your point perfectly, but I was hoping that your point was different from the impression I got from it. My mistake, I thought your point had deeper meaning than what you had written. It just seems so materialistic to me, so I had hope there was more to it since you were using a concept like energy to represent it.

Also, I tried to give you examples of what I consider important that couples supply to each other that are not easily acquired via the use of capital. What I wrote is not split between the genders, because what I wrote is not unique to either one. The examples I gave also do not change because of changes in personal and/or group circumstances. All of what you mentioned can easily become a problem do to illness and/or loss of income and wealth.

 

[Liberty]

I understood your point perfectly, but I was hoping that your point was different from the impression I got from it. My mistake, I thought your point had deeper meaning than what you had written. It just seems so materialistic to me, so I had hope there was more to it since you were using a concept like energy to represent it.

Also, I tried to give you examples of what I consider important that couples supply to each other that are not easily acquired via the use of capital. What I wrote is not split between the genders, because what I wrote is not unique to either one. The examples I gave also do not change because of changes in personal and/or group circumstances. All of what you mentioned can easily become a problem do to illness and/or loss of income and wealth.

No, don't tell me you understand my point. You obviously don't. In fact, your nature of going back and forth over to no end speaks to catty feminine energy.

I have always suspected that you were a poster from the last board I posted on. That you are really a woman who I had a beef with, over there picking stupid fights with me. And, you never disappoint.

All that you have posted is proof that you don't get it. I was responding to Shaka's statement. He said:

Lol. I really believe I bring to the table the same thing they bring to the table. The want/need us the same as we do them. I always keep in mind that they are getting the same pleasures that I am.

I was pointing out that there are inherent differences that ALL women share, as there are inherent differences that ALL men share. Estrogen and testosterone produce differences in men and women . Can you understand that?

It was never about learned behavior. It was never about what men find important in choosing a mate, or what women find attractive in finding a mate. So, ALL that preaching to the choir that you have done was all in vain.

There are differences in men and women that are HARDWIRED. They have existed throughout eternity even in prehistoric times, so much that we have become somewhat unconscious of them. If it weren't so, homosexuality would run rampant. Homosexuality could be the rule, instead of the exception.

 

[shaka64]

Also, on feminine energies vs masculine energies, imo.... Feminine energy is that thing that compels women to beautify the home and everything around her, including her man. Masculine energy is that thing that compels men to fix things, provide and protect. One is not greater than the other. They compliment each other.

Go to a bachelors pad and you can usually notice right off the bat that it lacks a "woman's touch". (no décor, mix match furniture)

Go to a bachelorettes pad and you can usually notice right off the bat that it lacks a "man's touch" (broken fixtures, (etc.)

Wow I'm kind of shocked at the stereotyping. I never ran into the women you describe. I never had a woman tell me my pad needed a woman's touch they just melted into environment i created. When you say lack. Is there a need? The only thing that each pad has to be is clean. My pad didn't lack a woman's touch it didn't need it because it was mine. It had my touch. The home I live in with the wife is a combination of the both of us. Which is really not far from either of our styles. We like the same stuff. we did it like that.

 

[Liberty]

Wow I'm kind of shocked at the stereotyping. I never ran into the women you describe. I never had a woman tell me my pad needed a woman's touch they just melted into environment i created. When you say lack. Is there a need? The only thing that each pad has to be is clean. My pad didn't lack a woman's touch it didn't need it because it was mine. It had my touch. The home I live in with the wife is a combination of the both of us. Which is really not far from either of our styles. We like the same stuff. we did it like that.

Maybe "lack" is the wrong word. I mean without. If I visited a bachelors home and he had a vase of purple tulips on his dining room table, I would wonder....

I would never complain about the décor of his home. But, if I were to live in his home, I'd hope he didn't mind that I love purple tulips. And, I bring them home sometimes, because they make me happy. (among other feminine things)

*smile*