Black Relationships : Should Men Pay For Dates?

[Liberty]

drugged you? lol

My brother was a bouncer in male strip club and a lesbian strip club and he said the women are worse then the men. Again this is a new age and women are not waiting around to be pleasured they are instigating it

You are right. In college, for my best friends birthday, she wanted all of her 5 best friends to go to this black strip club. I was strongly against going, but she talked me into it. I was not prepared for the depravity I saw. Your brother is correct. These women were out of control beyond my belief. Everybody knew I was mad about being there. I thought these guys were going to be dancing on a stage. Nope. I was sitting in the back of our booth. Then some nitwit thought it would be a good laugh to hold up some money behind my head. So, this half naked dancer starts headed our way. He pulled the table out the booth and start grinding his crotch in my face. I was so done with them. You are right. If that situation speaks for a bunch of women, then yes, there are some lonely, desperate women out there. I stand corrected.

See? I'll admit when I am wrong.

 

[MS234]

See? I'll admit when I am wrong.

It was never about right or wrong. I grew up with your premise of thread as a rule in my life. This is how I was taught. Since year 2000 things have totally flip flopped. All the rules of yesteryear are no longer enforced. The young people and some older people are making new rules now.

So my premise on your question "should men pay for dates", is that no a man should not pay for dates in today's climate. If this question was asked in 1983 of course there would be a different response.

I appreciate you admitting you were wrong. It was never about that. it was not necessary. I never felt you were wrong I felt you weren't taking what's really going on out there into consideration.

So with the role of men and women changing so must rules.

You said you experienced some of this behavior in college. Now multiply what you saw by a billion.
yes it is wild out here. lol

 

[Liberty]

Here’s Why Men Should Still Pay For Dates

James Michael Sama thinks that this aspect of courtship should still exist, and here’s why.

“It’s 2016. Why are men still paying for women on dates?” Alfie Kohn asks in a recent Boston Globe Magazine article. He continues: “Men paying for meals may have made more sense when fewer women worked outside the home — and those who did faced a bigger gender wage gap — but today, unmarried women earn, on average, almost as much as single men. Yet traditional gender roles have persisted. Besides, what matters are the two specific people having dinner. If both make a good living, then the man’s paying for her makes precisely as much sense as the woman’s paying for him.”

The flaw in Mr. Kohn’s logic, whose intelligence and accomplishments I hold much respect for, is the idea that a man paying for a date has anything to do with money, at all. In reality, the concept of a chivalrous act that has persisted when many others have diminished, is not financially driven.

Consider: You’ve spotted this woman at your local coffee shop, or grocery store, or tagged in a friend’s Facebook photo. You’ve started up a conversation, and she has agreed to spend some time with you. Let’s keep it simple and say you go to dinner.

Fantastic! You pick her up, open the door, and are a perfect gentleman all night. Then, the bill comes. The next thing out of your mouth is “So, should we split it?”

A sure way to make your first date, your last.

In my opinion, the man should always pay for dates, at least in the beginning stages of a relationship. But, why? She makes her own money, maybe even more than you. Shouldn’t she split it? Or, maybe even pay for it?

No. And this is why: -

Read more
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/heres-men-still-pay-dates-dg/

 

[Liberty]

It was never about right or wrong. I grew up with your premise of thread as a rule in my life. This is how I was taught. Since year 2000 things have totally flip flopped. All the rules of yesteryear are no longer enforced. The young people and some older people are making new rules now. t

So my premise on your question "should men pay for dates", is that no a man should not pay for dates in today's climate. If this question was asked in 1983 of course there would be a different response.

I appreciate you admitting you were wrong. It was never about that. it was not necessary. I never felt you were wrong I felt you weren't taking what's really going on out there into consideration.

So with the role of men and women changing so must rules.

You said you experienced some of this behavior in college. Now multiply what you saw by a billion.
yes it is wild out here. lol

Well, there are still some men and women who adhere to the traditional values. And, I believe there are advantages to that. If I were a man, and a woman was upping the punany on our first date, I would never trust her, or respect her. But, that's just me. Likewise, if I were dating a man a he was game on the first date, I would lose respect for him too.

 

[Liberty]

Here’s Why Men Should Still Pay For Dates

James Michael Sama thinks that this aspect of courtship should still exist, and here’s why.

“It’s 2016. Why are men still paying for women on dates?” Alfie Kohn asks in a recent Boston Globe Magazine article. He continues: “Men paying for meals may have made more sense when fewer women worked outside the home — and those who did faced a bigger gender wage gap — but today, unmarried women earn, on average, almost as much as single men. Yet traditional gender roles have persisted. Besides, what matters are the two specific people having dinner. If both make a good living, then the man’s paying for her makes precisely as much sense as the woman’s paying for him.”

The flaw in Mr. Kohn’s logic, whose intelligence and accomplishments I hold much respect for, is the idea that a man paying for a date has anything to do with money, at all. In reality, the concept of a chivalrous act that has persisted when many others have diminished, is not financially driven.

Consider: You’ve spotted this woman at your local coffee shop, or grocery store, or tagged in a friend’s Facebook photo. You’ve started up a conversation, and she has agreed to spend some time with you. Let’s keep it simple and say you go to dinner.

Fantastic! You pick her up, open the door, and are a perfect gentleman all night. Then, the bill comes. The next thing out of your mouth is “So, should we split it?”

A sure way to make your first date, your last.

In my opinion, the man should always pay for dates, at least in the beginning stages of a relationship. But, why? She makes her own money, maybe even more than you. Shouldn’t she split it? Or, maybe even pay for it?

No. And this is why: -

Read more
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/heres-men-still-pay-dates-dg/

Quotes from the article (you guys probably didn't even read):


"Courting has a purpose, a purpose that our generations easily lose sight of because they are caught up in the dating game and don’t understand how beautiful it is to actually form a connection with someone. She doesn’t need you to pay for her dinner, and she might even offer to split it. But **** it you fool, don’t you ever take her up on that offer. She wants to be swept off of her feet, to be romanced, to be valued and appreciated. To be pursued. That is why you pay for the date. It’s symbolic. It’s symbolic like wanting you to kill the spider. To open the door. To slay the dragon."

"Secondly, dating is not exactly a free ride for a woman. A 2011 Match.com survey uncovered the following statistics:

– 53% of women said they spend money in advance on new outfits and pre-date grooming.

– 65% of women spend more than $50 on preparing for the date.

She might go out and buy new shoes, or get her nails done, or even get her hair done. Do you have any idea what it costs for a manicure, pedicure, and a haircut? Probably more than you will spend on dinner, even at a nice restaurant in the city. "

Read more
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/heres-men-still-pay-dates-dg/