Black Jokes Humor : Sexually Frustrated

Discussion in 'Black Jokes Humor' started by 4EVERLUV, Sep 16, 2006.

  1. 4EVERLUV

    4EVERLUV Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    When girls don't put out!!
    This was written by a guy... it's pretty **** smart. Girls -- Have a sense of humor!

    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

    FOR EXAMPLE:

    One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

    Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

    I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

    So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

    "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

    She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

    Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

    We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

    I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all
    dear, let's go to the cashier."

    I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

    Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

    I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

    And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

    Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least now she knows I'm smarter than her.

     
  2. Ikoro

    Ikoro Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    AH!

    Goodness, that was so funny.

    A little insensitive maybe, but as a joke it was really funny.

    Whoo-ee. That was a good one.

    Thanks for sharing *smiles*

    ~Ikoro
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    lol..........what a way to twist the game .....lol
     
  4. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I really got to say...He sho nuff got that one off...lol..I like that one.
     
  5. SAMURAI36

    SAMURAI36 Banned MEMBER

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    This was awesome.

    PEACE
     
  6. cursed heart

    cursed heart Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    That was hillarious!
     
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