Black Relationships : - SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT YOUR EX

Although I did say something good about my ex on this thread, my gut feeling is, you have to close the door behind you to open the door in front of you. A lot of new relationships never materialize because many of us don't let things come to a natural close, really due to selfish reasons.

In saying this, I don't mean just cut someone off completely. As I said, things have a natural way of coming to a closure with your ex, without harsh feelings toward one another. Therefore when you're in a new relationship, you should still be able to say hello to them for a minute or two if you run into them later on in the future. If that happens, and they decide to keep in touch, it's usually because they want to get back together. I wouldn't recommend that, unless you don't plan on being in your new relationship long, or you don't respect it enough. If neither of you are in a new relationship, then you may as well get back together if your going to keep in touch. As I said earlier, keeping in touch will only hinder new relationships most of the time.

Where I'm getting to is, calling your ex every time you're lonely or just to see how they are doing with their new relationship or their new life, isn't going to cut it. I don't care if it's only every couple of years, unless you plan on possibly getting back with them, which, and I'll say it one last time, will likely hinder new relationships from forming, or jeopardize the one you have.

I made have said things here some don't totally agree with, and I may have taken this thread a little off topic, but that's my true opinion about the ex's.

I forgot to mention if you have kids with your ex, that is of course an exception. But it should only be about the kids. That's how it is when every I speak with the mother of my daughter, and my is daughter is 31.
 
Although I did say something good about my ex on this thread, my gut feeling is, you have to close the door behind you to open the door in front of you. A lot of new relationships never materialize because many of us don't let things come to a natural close, really due to selfish reasons.

In saying this, I don't mean just cut someone off completely. As I said, things have a natural way of coming to a closure with your ex, without harsh feelings toward one another. Therefore when you're in a new relationship, you should still be able to say hello to them for a minute or two if you run into them later on in the future. If that happens, and they decide to keep in touch, it's usually because they want to get back together. I wouldn't recommend that, unless you don't plan on being in your new relationship long, or you don't respect it enough. If neither of you are in a new relationship, then you may as well get back together if your going to keep in touch. As I said earlier, keeping in touch will only hinder new relationships most of the time.

Where I'm getting to is, calling your ex every time you're lonely or just to see how they are doing with their new relationship or their new life, isn't going to cut it. I don't care if it's only every couple of years, unless you plan on possibly getting back with them, which, and I'll say it one last time, will likely hinder new relationships from forming, or jeopardize the one you have.

I made have said things here some don't totally agree with, and I may have taken this thread a little off topic, but that's my true opinion about the ex's.

Do you think it wise for a former couple to stay separate and live together as roomates, due to financial/ economic reasons?

Also do you feel it backwards to still hang out from time to time with your ex.
I ask this because like I posted earlier my ex and I still do hang out, and though i don't bring my date interest (when i do date) around her, we still do movie dates (without the kiddos) shop together, go to lunch, and can talk about work and about dating.
Sounds strange but it just works that way.

Women I date don't get it, and I don't expect them to, my friends think it strange that there isn't any sex involved, we just get together when we can.
Highly doubt it would turn into anything serious with her.
 
Do you think it wise for a former couple to stay separate and live together as roomates, due to financial/ economic reasons?

Also do you feel it backwards to still hang out from time to time with your ex.
I ask this because like I posted earlier my ex and I still do hang out, and though i don't bring my date interest (when i do date) around her, we still do movie dates (without the kiddos) shop together, go to lunch, and can talk about work and about dating.
Sounds strange but it just works that way.

Women I date don't get it, and I don't expect them to, my friends think it strange that there isn't any sex involved, we just get together when we can.
Highly doubt it would turn into anything serious with her.


Do you think it wise for a former couple to stay separate and live together as roomates, due to financial/ economic reasons?

I think if this needs to be done, it should be as temporary as possible.

Also do you feel it backwards to still hang out from time to time with your ex.
I ask this because like I posted earlier my ex and I still do hang out, and though i don't bring my date interest (when i do date) around her, we still do movie dates (without the kiddos) shop together, go to lunch, and can talk about work and about dating.
Sounds strange but it just works that way.
If you don't ever plan on getting into another long term relationship, then I guess it's okay. However you may be robbing each other without even knowing it.

But at the same time, as I said, relationships with ex's have a natural way of bringing closure. If someone walks into your life and she's fine, and you really, really see something in her, the relationship with your ex will fade away when she sees that change in you. But if you tell this new date about your relationship with your ex, then more than likely she will be the one fading away, especially if she's fine. As a matter of fact, if she's fine, then she might not even go for it in the first place. This is just my take on things from a general perspective.
 

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