Black People : R. Kelly Situation - Where do you stand?

Discussion in 'Black People Open Forum' started by Destee, Mar 4, 2002.

  1. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    I'm sure most have heard of the recent trials and tribulations of our beloved Brother, R. Kelly. I've heard folk on both sides of the argument.

    Some say that young girls today (the female was 14 at the time of the alleged act) know more about sex than their parents. That they ask for it, welcome it, and even entice grown men into doing things they'd not do otherwise. They say he's not at fault. That she's probably (and obviously even, if you've seen the tape) quite experienced and having sex with men (or boys) is nothing new in her life. The only reason it's such a big fuss now, is because it's R. Kelly and there is perhaps money to be made.

    Then there are those folk that say he preys on young, less than adult, females. That this is his own perversion that has finally caught up with him. He needs to pay heavily for the crime he's committed. They have said that it makes no difference how willing the child is, it's (statutory) rape and he should do time. Many on this side of the argument swear that they'll not support him in the future and if they could get their money back on previously purchased R. Kelly products, they'd be the first in line.

    There are even some that say not only should R. Kelly be prosecuted to the full extent of the law, but so should her parents, the person taping the video and any and all that had anything to do with the "rape" of this child.

    Where do you stand?
     
  2. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    hummmmm!!!!! R.kelly i must say do seem to like younger gurls
    but i also understand the young one do have ways to go after
    older men on his side i see it as a money thang!! well i am a
    supporter of his now if he's wrong then he should pay da price
    yet his music i will buy coz da brutha can sing!!!
    just hope it all work out for him and he see da reality of young one is not to fool wit dem coz he for one should know better
     
  3. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    indeed Kem i agree i see it as a money thing what a shame
    such a child knows of sexual stuff like dis and yes any man
    or woman whom take on such acts should be put away
    so sorry another brutha gotta go down by da hands of his
    pervertation........****!
     
  4. Destee

    Destee destee.com STAFF

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    I found this really sad, disheartening article about this topic. The author says ...

    Police can't lay a hand on Kelly because he's trolling a community where having sex with underage girls isn't a big deal. How could it be when so many 14-, 15- and 16-year-old girls in the black community get pregnant by older men and the men aren't charged with a crime.

    ....

    So Kelly doesn't have much to worry about. As long as he is being accused of having sex with underage black girls, the allegations will draw a collective yawn.

    ....

    So instead of getting a groundswell of support from within the community for speaking up, these young women will be vilified for trying to bring a brother down.

    .....

    To bring Kelly down, they would have had to videotape him in bed with an underage white girl.

    .....


    You can read it all here:
    http://www.suntimes.com/output/mitchell/cst-nws-mitch14.html
     
  5. alyce

    alyce Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I feel the heartache and the outrage here. Unfortunately, the general public doesn't care about the atrocities that go on in Black lives. If we're killing each other, that's just a few less ......they have to deal with.

    I agree there are very young ladies who know more about sex than some adults. While working with abused/abandoned youth, I met many of them. They all looked 25, but they were only 12-17. And most of them already had a few children. Every one of them had an older boyfriend, anywhere from 25-40. NONE of them were willing, nor did they ever turn them in for statutory rape. More often than not, these young ladies would run away from the facility when they needed to satisfy their underaged "jones"...even turn a few tricks for money, etc. (these "boyfriends" in most cases were nothing more than pimps)...then come back to the center when they needed 3 squares and a warm bed.

    That is the extreme side of it. I know of young ladies doing their do straight from home. Intact families; mother and father working, but so out of touch with what their daughter is doing. (son too, for that matter). It isn't always the poor, underprivileged girlchild who doesn't have a father in the home out looking for "love". But lack of communication with our children, too many privileges, too much idle time (because everybody's out making money), no extracurricular school activities, no positive mental stimulation, and too much television, has served to push our young people out into that adult life well before they're ready to deal with the consequences.

    And because a sweet young tenderonie is mouth-watering for many men, a girl fitting that description who is putting it out there, will get snatched up into it. I have always maintained that a male who can only find his sexual gratification on the play yard, has a mental deficiency. Like Kem says, that is a 'minor'. Body may be of a full grown woman; but that child has no understanding.

    We all understand that there comes a time when mental/emotion/physical all come together, and I'm not speaking against men who have relationships with younger women....who are truly "of age" (or vice-versa). What I'm talking about is a person who is clearly perverted; who would prey upon an ignorant but willing girl because the hormones are screaming.

    If R. Kelly has in fact been caught redhanded....he's guilty. No doubt. And if he does frequent the playground...then his sins have caught up with him. I agree with Kem about charging the parents for their part in this crime. There IS something wrong in the home if a child is being allowed to run their life any kind of way. This would send a message.

    The only sad thing about all of this is as Destee states... R. Kelly might walk because the public is not interested. He would be looked upon as just another demented and depraved Black man...doing what "they all do".

    My 2 cents...

    a
     
  6. alyce

    alyce Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Don't even get me started on mothers who encourage their daughters to flaunt their wares in order to get a man who will take care of them.

    How do we get common decency back in our community? Good question. I can only speak from my experience as an agent of human resources/social services. We have available to our clients, workshops of all kinds (we advertise and even lure them with "door prizes"...I know, but it works). My particular "baby" or project is "effective parenting". Yes, I talk to the parents ABOUT instilling values into their children in order to rebuild the infrastructure of our community. We stress positive parental modeling because we all know (and they do recognize by the time I'm finished, if they didn't know already), that children do what we do, and NOT what we say. We discuss what dreams are, we challenge them and help them to define their own goals....many of these parents are hearing much of this for the first time. I find the ones who are willing to know how to strengthen their family unit, come to the classes. It is not mandatory to attend these workshops; it is their choice.

    We hope we can touch one somebody who will go home and put into practice some of the good information they've been given. But in too many homes, even though the parent may know and even disagree with what their children are into... they've rendered themselves ineffective years ago when the kids were much younger, and no longer have control. My aim is to do preventive counseling. My hope is to assist the parents with infants and toddlers; help them establish that respect early on, reining those small ones in with a loving but firm hand BEFORE they get out there where the larger society is waiting, ready to tear down through media, etc., what families struggle to keep together. Dignity and self-respect is at an all-time low today.

    We who have understanding and information are duty-bound to do what we can, whether in our churches, in our schools, in our neigborhoods, on our jobs. We have a responsibility to one another.

    My 10 cents

    a
     
  7. NNQueen

    NNQueen going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    Alyce...I salute you my friend, because I agree with your 12 cents worth of commentary! Destee, thank you for raising a very important topic. This is yet another example of the many illnesses that are running amuck in our Black communities today.

    Blacks shouldn't consider this entertainment news, but rather another alarm ringing loud and clear in our communities that WE have a huge and pervasive problem. Who is listening to the bells ringing?

    Alyce I applaud you for what you are doing and I know it's a daunting task but a necessary one if we are ever to help the Black family rebuild it's moral fiber. In my opinion, only then will we begin to live full and healthy lives as a people.

    Thanks to R. Kelly and people like him, once again we collectively find ourselves asking the question, "why?" Who do we blame? The R. Kelly's? The young girls? The parents? Personally, I believe that anyone among us who is opposed to this type of behavior and doesn't raise your voice in outrage against this type of horror, is to blame. And, not only should our voices be raised, but individually and collectively nationwide, we should take a moral stance and step boldly out in public denouncing such behavior.

    Today, we're living better economically than Blacks ever have in this country. Morally, I believe we're the worse we've ever been. What happened to us...when did we lose our moral/spiritual grounding? We have access to so much information, we have more choices, more opportunities available to us. Then why are a great many of us so apathetic (almost downright hatred) toward each other, so willing to let the media define who we are and most often in very negative ways?

    If R. Kelly is found guilty of breaking a law, then he should pay the price for his crime. But that alone won't (and shouldn't) put and end to the problem. R. Kelly can't pay for the sins of others everyone who are guilty of a similary "crime". Only a public outcry and unified front against it will.

    Where are the Black ministers? Where are the Black professionals? Where are the Black political leaders? Where are the parents who are trying to raise their children the "right" way? Where are the grandparents who remember a better time? This is not an issue of race, so where is Al Sharpton, Johnny Cochran and Jesse Jackson on this issue?

    I wonder....

    When are we going to finally wake up and realize that we've been living in a nightmare for far too long? We don't need a so-called to speak out for us--we're capable of speaking for ourselves. How many more stories about infidelity, sexually deviate behavior, abuse, murder and other hateful things among Blacks do we have to have thrown in our faces before we realize that we're dying as a community?

    Sometimes I think a tear should fall in sadness each time a Black baby is born...

    Sorry if I rambled on too long...but here's my 2 cents worth....

    NNQ
     
  8. diva08

    diva08 Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    r kelly is not that talented

    he is not talented enough to do anything like that and think he can get away with it -- nobody is

    its plain wrong and he needs to be put in jail (but money does talk)

    we need to stop allowing white people to screw up our culture where family values for the most part have been upheld (who started the "sexual revolution"??)

    we have always been seen as a conservative culture

    we have been so busy concerned about our own human rights and sticking together we didn't have time to hurt each other - jim crow did enough of that.

    now we think we've "arrived" enough to start killing each other, "raping" our young women and thinking so much of ourselves we dont even care enough to think about someone else

    in doing all of this we are taking the job away from those who have no love for the darker peoples - killing ourselves
    erasing our culture
    stopping the line of learning - black history will be in books that can be burned rather than minds and hearts that can never forget
    populating the world with ignorance because our children have children and don't have enough of an education to even take good care of them much less help them with their homework

    i would try to get philosophical and spiritual and say that all of this stems from allowing our physical desires to take priority over everything and in screwing without thought we screw up everything...... but this is so disheartening i cant say anymore.

    diva needs a nap

    peace
     
  9. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

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    i agree wit all y'all all i can say is it's sad to see another
    brutha got out in dis forum .......down low wasn't low enough!!
    sad sad sad !! or sick
     
  10. Bishop

    Bishop Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    This all comes from a brotha who on one side of the coin is bumping and grinding & then in the same breath spouting his religious convictions.....But sooner or later certain people outsmart themselves.......Brotha couldn't have been too smart to videotape himself with these girls.....He should be put under the jail...These girls are just going to be given the negative titles ascribed to their act, while he's going to get off as the victim of a bunch of underage golddiggers......The key word is underage...I don't care how fine the girl is...How well endowed she is.....If she's underage she's underaged..hence you have rape. I have no sympathy for the brotha...Now it does take two to tango, but c'mon who's the adult? How you gonna let an underage girl get you so horny that you break the law...This shows the brotha has no control.....the brotha needs to grow up...This ain't Space Jam and he just can't fly when and where he wants to. One day some father or mother gonna bust a cap in his fly behind!!!!!

    Bishop has spoken......

    By the way here in Chitown....He has lost much respect!!!

    Peace.
     
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