Question to the Brothers

Discussion in 'Black Men - Fathers - Brothers - Sons' started by MANASIAC, Apr 4, 2006.

  1. MANASIAC

    MANASIAC Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Do you think it is difficult for Black Men to talk about our sisters because all of us have varying degrees of opinions about sisters?

    Some Black Men will tell you Black women are heaven and some brothers will say they are hell.

    The intriguing of all of this is that we will sometimes come the aforementioned two conclusions after dating the same type of Black Woman or the same one.

    Feel free to post anything...
     
  2. SAMURAI36

    SAMURAI36 Banned MEMBER

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    I have to admit, that when hearing Brothers, not unlike yourself, speak of Black women, it almost seems as if we are talking about 2 totally different creatures sometimes.

    The exceptions to the rule (such as my mother, the awesome Sisters here, and a precious few that I have had the honor of meeting and knowing) notwithstanding, I am sincerely ashamed to say that my experiences with them have not been very good overall. :(

    However, in honor of my mother (RIP), and out of respect for the few wonderful Sisters that I know, and not to mention my spirituality and culture, I will have to keep trying, and if things don't work out the way I would like........Well, I guess there's always next lifetime.

    It's a good thing that I believe in reincarnation!! :D

    PEACE
     
  3. Bisabee

    Bisabee Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    I'm a sister, so I hope I don't get into trouble here but have any of you men ever considered a matchmaking service? I don't know if this is the right place to ask this. My friend and I were kicking the idea around the other day of starting one. She wants to do it as a way to meet men but I want to do it as a business. Could I get some feedback?
     
  4. MANASIAC

    MANASIAC Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    That sound like a cool IDea Bisabee.
     
  5. jgyknowledge

    jgyknowledge Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    In my single days........

    I've always been a good judge of character.....and I can pretty much know my interest level from a 1 hour conversation.
     
  6. Kemetstry

    Kemetstry going above and beyond PREMIUM MEMBER

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    I dont think we have a problem discussing them at all. It has been my experience that brothers talk about sisters ad nausem. I just dont think there is a right to assume that we all have or even should have the same point of view about them or even one in particular.

    Sometimes they are heaven. Sometimes they are hell.
     
  7. Omowale Jabali

    Omowale Jabali The Cosmic Journeyman PREMIUM MEMBER

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    It depends on WHO I am talking too the the circumstances. The only difficulty I really find is when discussing some problems with Sisters who get over-emotional and have problems dealing with my honesty or response, or with "brothers" who will involve themselves by getting in the middle of an argument or problem I may be experiencing with a particular woman.
     
  8. Omowale Jabali

    Omowale Jabali The Cosmic Journeyman PREMIUM MEMBER

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    exactly!....:bullseye:
     
  9. HODEE

    HODEE Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Do you think it is difficult for Black Men to talk about our sisters because all of us have varying degrees of opinions about sisters?

    Some Black Men will tell you Black women are heaven and some brothers will say they are hell.

    The intriguing of all of this is that we will sometimes come the aforementioned two conclusions after dating the same type of Black Woman or the same one.

    Feel free to post anything...


    Do you think it is difficult for Black Men to talk about our sisters?

    No it isn’t difficult to talk about our sisters. It is difficult sometimes to agree with some of them. It is hard sometimes to relate to their desires of a pleasant time 24/7 when neither especially a man has a 24/7 pleasant day. To me it is ignoring truth. To me it is fooling myself first to not be concerned. I am concerned enough to bring the topic up.

    In the past I have come home to discuss the treatment I felt white bosses and co-workers were exhibiting at work. Partly out of fear partly because I excelled in many things they themselves fell short in accomplishing. My skill set was stronger so many new opportunitys were channeled thru me. My efforts at work are serious and sincere. I don’t skirt the work or the issues. Long story short. I a few cases they trumped up things and looked for reasons to call me disruptive. That based only on the fact I spoke up when discrimination occured.

    In a relationship conversation for a man often turns political. A woman sometimes do not want to hear this. I find how it is expressed and how often I bring up political ssues may be a factor. Then I realize who else I can express my feelings and concerns to. It has to be some one close to me I enjoy talking with and trust.

    My wife doesn’t like me getting political and I don’t twist it to sound negative, most of the time I am just relaying facts and comments I heard or are considering. It contains enough truth to consider. Many of those same things she will hear coming from Bill Mauer. She likes his political humor. He brings and it with a twist and makes me glad to some degree she is taking it in. He has a no holds barred way to sending the same message and bringing an issue to light and making it funny. But I can’t make it funny that way. To me it is serious and effecting me down the road, my interest or us ( me and her, in some cases others and my concern for a fellow man runs deep ) in some manner.

    She doesn’t understand the hard press a man suffers especially a black man when he sees a disjoint in his efforts, reality and game as we call it sometimes. I don't like games. false faces, smiles or effort. So I will never dance or drink the kool-aid.

    Some Black Men will tell you Black women are heaven and some brothers will say they are hell.

    It becomes hell when she calls me negative. Saying I bring these things on myself. It’s like saying I created the negative racism I experience. ( Its like I should be ashamed or make excuses for being a black man. Something I will never do. ) I make a difference if I can, take my lumps in the process. Pay the cost for this stance. Not only with her, but I find other employment and do not hesitate to file charges in some cases. So I don’t share as much any more and keep many things on my mind and never work thru the thought. Not good in many respects. I need to reflect not just off my own thoughts but someone elses. My mate I think I should be able to discuss the issues I’m concerned with. This when I feel I am catching hell from my woman. When she had a simular experience. She turned to me and I supported her. We did follow thru because the complaint came back and they asked her to come in personally to file. We decided to spare the boss man. But he deserved just what I would have given him. That time she was in the position of concern. We read the complaint and I worded it just right that man was going to catch hell.. he was lucky this time.

    I haven't experienced what some may term catching real hell from a woman. Like evil.. always mad, never cooperating or supporting. I do experience edges of this. I think I get as much as I give and sometimes I don't and can't cooperate 100% with my spouse. So don't we sometimes create the uneasy?
     
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