Black Relationships : Playing the "game" right

Discussion in 'Black Relationships' started by legit-writer, Aug 11, 2009.

  1. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Why when a person plays the game right, whether it's in life in general, or dating, or relationships or jobwise, you still lose? I mean, do you have to play dirty like people do in politics? Is there some type of cheat code that must be used since honesty and truth seems not to cut the mustard?? Enlighten me, someone please!!!
     
  2. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    not a LEVEL playing field

    Greetings legit-writer.

    BlackTasTic question to explore. I don't know if what I have to share will be "enlightening" to you yet it will reveal what I have come to KNOW about my "black life" here on earth now.

    I have come to KNOW that for white people, "the whole world is a stage and everyone PLAYS a part" in their THINKING and BEHAVING. they PLAY "war games", "language games", "research games" and "teaching games". They wrote it down and I read it.
    These "games" were designed for us to "lose" because they are in charge here on earth now. They change the rules at will AND they TELL US ALL THE TIME in all there "legal" documents and contracts. Remember the fine print that says...."subject to change":?:
    It seems in order for any of us to "win", we MUST adopt their way of THINKING AND BEHAVING and THAT is their TRUE GAME...to get us to become just like them....incomplete, dishonest, half truths, out of order, off kilter (imbalanced)...going against our natural grain...MA'AT.

    Regarding LEVELS...I have come to KNOW that I WIN as I RE~spect that which I AM.....SPIRIT-FILLED. Being from and of SPIRIT when it appears I am "losing", I am actually WINNING....in the Spirit realm.
    There are five levels of lived experience for me. They are first (and last) SPIRIT/UNIVERSAL, Societal, Communal, Familial and Individual.

    I came to this realm called earth into an INDIVIDUAL BODY from the SPIRIT realm. I am (now) guided by that realm. I am a living in a society with values etc established by white folks. That ish filters/flows down to the community, families and individuals.
    When this INDIVIDUAL BODY is done, I RE~turn to the SPIRIT realm. That connection is cyclic and not linear...which is more of the yt's way of THINKING AND BEHAVING.

    Now that I'm clear about who and what I AM, I no longer play THEIR game. My "game" is to hold fast to who and what I AM...and practice that (MA'AT) because my "prize" is not here....now.....
    It is back where I came from...SPIRIT/ANCESTRAL REALM.

    I hope this makes SOME sense to you and others reading. If not, feel free to ask for clarity. This is just what I've come to KNOW about ....
    Thanks for Listening!

    M.E.
    :hearts2:
     
  3. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Losing in relationships

    That was very inspirational. I agree that you have to think for yourself and not play someone else's game. I guess I'm trying to figure out how to "get out" of playing their "game", and starting forming my own. Quite frankly, I am tired of it. I have one to ask you as far as relationships are concerned:

    Inquiring minds also wants to know why do we seem to lose when it comes to relationships?? Like, for example, why when a person says they are tired of being played with and that them themselves are not out to play games with you, and you are the very person who actually is about being real and not on some games, yet you end up getting hurt? The very same person who was hurt int he past, ends up hurting you too. I mean what is that about??? I guess I have yet to understand why that is how it is.
     
  4. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Blessings and Praises to the Ancestors and Creator of WE for the CONNECTION.:bowdown:

    I say "connection" because I have found and therefore, come to KNOW for SELF, that this is what happens (being inspired by each other's words cause it was a DIRECT RESULT of YOU sharing your THOUGHTS, FEELINGS AND BEHAVIORS that "inspired" me share what I did!!) when we "touch and agree"..as in 'adding to', filling up with, "to breathe in", taking in of air....life force...in our INTER- ACTIONS....RE~Lating one to another....RE~LAT~I~ON~SHIP...like ships passing in the nite we stop and dock with each other for a period of time giving and receiving ....I N Form (me giving to you) At I On (you giving to me) [information]

    The Power of WE.....When we are in a Relationship, We provide what is needed....N.E.E.D. Necessary Energy Elevating Divinity...i.e INSPIRATION..."inspired"

    ..HOW:?:....


    BY THE WORDS WE CHOOSE TO USE WHEN INTERACTING....I.E. "IN A RELATIONSHIP" WITH EACH OTHER....AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT IN TIME....WHEN AND WHERE WE HAVE COME TOGETHER....

    LIKE YOU AND I LEGIT-WRITER....HERE....NOW.....


    Yes and I've found it to be a "WOW, WHOA WHEW" (a phrase i learned from another Warrior Woman of Afreekan Descent who asked me to not mention her name in quotes or other forms of CONNECTING/INTERACTION :SuN030:)

    yet that's the feelings that comes up as I recognize the job with DOING just this you suggest!


    "think for SELF" (legit-writer) There has been so much ish dumped I've just found it to be an extremely and time consuming task....I talked about this in today's LIVE meeting of R.N.A. doing the work of "Externalizing the Stinking poo/Sh:shh: This is a form of Family Therapy that takes into account the "story" the person is living. i.e "someone else's game" for and in OUR LIVES. Work to develop our NARRATIVE or 'story' i.e "game" "marching to the beat of my own drum"....that's the WORK of RE~Covery.....LOOKING AT SELF!
    hard and dirty task ...yet...."somebody gotta do it"....."here am I send me" to take care of my own ish...KNOWING SELF....


    I engage myself in the aforementioned Program/Tool for Healing. That's what I've "figured out" for SELF.

    SISTER/BROTHER :)?: which are you)...this is NO "Lie" for me. I TOO...have found it to be a dang TIRING AND TIRESOME PROCESS.... I was and still am "tired of it" any given moment in time we are here working to 'effectively' manage SELF and protect self from "OPS"...Other People's Sh :donttell: :rain:

    Because WE have DEPARTED....SEPARATED like in that "ships passing in the night" example, when it come time SPIRITUALLY...(we've given and received that which was 'ordered/ordained') then it's time to MOVE ON.....DISCONNECT and in so doing....a LOST...
    I DO LOSE when there is a disconnect.,.no more relationship...and I gain as well...yet right now you have raised and WE are discussing this side of the coin.....


    HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE

    and will continue to do so IF they chose not to enter a Program of RECOVERY....and BE~gin the Process of HEALING....the hurts.....
    that's my take anywho based on my E.S.P. (Experiences, Strengths and Plans)

    Thanks For Sharing!:qqb015::toast:

    M.E.
    :hearts2:
     
  5. mazimtaim

    mazimtaim Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    :)

    Only True to the Cause could post something so beautiful.
     
  6. mazimtaim

    mazimtaim Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Sister, I hear you. I understand a bit about your frustration. I have had some of the same issues. I felt like I was meeting women who were simply playing games with me and refused to be real. I started to really dislike "Black" women, as I claimed the reasons for this had to do with culture. I dated outside of my race for awhile. I am kind of ashamed of those days. Then I realized that many of the those "White" women I was dating were only using me too.

    It is really hard to settle down and just have a serious relationship because of all the games that are being played. And "Black" men and women don't know how to just sit down and talk with one another seriously.

    All I can say sista, is please don't give up and lose hope. You sound like such a good person.
     
  7. truetothecause

    truetothecause Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    Just when I thought I had fallen from your good graces.......

    Much *L.O.V.E. right Black at ya!:qqb015:


    *L.ifting O.ur V.ALUABLE E.nergy



    M.E.
    :hearts2:
     
  8. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    You get played for fool for playing the game right

    Thanks for the compliment. I do my best to be great woman each and everyday. Well recently the guy who was supposedly supposed to be "with me", I found out he is engaged to who he say is his ex. He lied to me about everything basically. I brought it up to him in a nice manner and all he had to say was it is no use in explaining it because I seem to have already have my mind made up. Then he goes on to say that he has a lot going on in his life that maybe he doesn't have time for a relationship. Yeah that's because he is in a relationship with who he say is his ex. Then he pulls out the whole "I'll call you back" and I never heard from him again. Then I deleted all his contact information and let him know that he is going to have to answer to the man upstairs and that he had better watch his back. It's funny he says he doesn't want people playing games with him, yet he is doing that with me. This is what I mean by me playing the game right (being honest and truthful) seems to have caused him to lie to me, which is scandalous. I wonder, should I start lying too since no man out there has been honest with me and that my honesty and intelligence is such a threat? Sorry that this got all lengthy.
     
  9. mazimtaim

    mazimtaim Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    No need to apologize sista. I am so sorry that happened. Sufficed to say that "we", those of us who are single, are going to have to find a way to make our intimacy worthwhile. I have done some things that I am ashamed of, sista. I was intimate with a sista after only knowing her for two days. I will never do that again. It was a mistake and now I know that I can't continue to make it.

    For sistas, I know it is harder. Because men look upon sex as some kind of conquest. They simply play the game as hard as they can until they "win". After that, they move on. But not all of us are that way. I plan to be celibate until I find that woman that I know is the one.
     
  10. legit-writer

    legit-writer Well-Known Member MEMBER

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    That's a smart move. Now you see why I'm so careful. With that guy I just told you about, I am blessed more than angry. That's just one less person I have to worry about.
     
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