Black Relationships : Personal Privacy in Relationships?

[Coach707]

A friend of mine is going through a terrible divorce only because her husband supposedly stumbled across her daily journal and read all about her sexual fantasies a man whom she worked with. She also told me that she described in detail a casual relationship with another guy. I feel bad because that guy was me, but the issue at hand is far greater.

Is there a right to personal space and personal privacy once two people get married? Of course her husband has a right to get mad, but was her privacy violated? Or, as her spouse does he have the right to invade her personal space?

What do you all think?

 

[panafrica]

A friend of mine is going through a terrible divorce only because her husband supposedly stumbled across her daily journal and read all about her sexual fantasies a man whom she worked with. She also told me that she described in detail a casual relationship with another guy. I feel bad because that guy was me, but the issue at hand is far greater.

Is there a right to personal space and personal privacy once two people get married? Of course her husband has a right to get mad, but was her privacy violated? Or, as her spouse does he have the right to invade her personal space?

What do you all think?

I think there has to be a respect for personal privacy in a healthy relationship. I also think your friend was extremely foolish to keep such a daily journal. It can't be assumed that her husband was looking through her panty drawer for dirt. He could have stumbled upon it, or she might have given him a reason to look. I don't blame him for being upset by what he found.

 

[Tantrum]

I think everyone needs there space
Whether they are married or not
I mean you really dont want your mate
Going everywhere you go
It gets kind of annoying
Sometimes too the point it can defuse the relationship
So I think space is needed-Maybe even have your own room
Within your home where you can just relax
Nothing wrong with that

 

[jgyknowledge]

Personal privacy in a marriage? Now, that's a tricky question it seems.....

When two people get married the majority of your "personal privacy" goes out the window. It would have to depend on his reasoning for reading her "personal diary". If its to simply try to catch her doing something wrong, then there are trust issues within the relationship. But, he has every right just as she does to look through anything that is considered personal. If neither party is hiding anything, then there shouldn't be a problem. Apparently, he was having some suspicions and decided to investigate. As a married person having intense fantasies about a co-worker and a "friend" are definately reasons for him being upset. Wouldn't you feel betrayed? I'd be pissed because she was having problems with her attraction to her co-worker. How long before she acts on her fantasies? Especially if they're having some problems, and if not him then someone else. Then she goes on to describe her personal relationship with a "friend". She seems to have a problem with her priorities, which should lie with her husband. Not a co-worker and definately not a "friend".

Personal space is reserved for single people.

 

[panafrica]

Personal privacy in a marriage? Now, that's a tricky question it seems.....

When two people get married the majority of your "personal privacy" goes out the window. It would have to depend on his reasoning for reading her "personal diary". If its to simply try to catch her doing something wrong, then there are trust issues within the relationship. But, he has every right just as she does to look through anything that is considered personal. If neither party is hiding anything, then there shouldn't be a problem. Apparently, he was having some suspicions and decided to investigate. As a married person having intense fantasies about a co-worker and a "friend" are definately reasons for him being upset. Wouldn't you feel betrayed? I'd be pissed because she was having problems with her attraction to her co-worker. How long before she acts on her fantasies? Especially if they're having some problems, and if not him then someone else. Then she goes on to describe her personal relationship with a "friend". She seems to have a problem with her priorities, which should lie with her husband. Not a co-worker and definately not a "friend".

Personal space is reserved for single people.

It is difficult to share a house/apartment with someone; share a bathroom with someone; share a bedroom with someone, and not be in someone's personal space. I agree with you completely in this regard jgyknowledge.