I welcome the pain as a necessary reprieve from the happiness, A much needed break from the insuffable joy I am sometimes plagued with. But since I know I must endure heaven to appreciate the burn of hell I will myself to wait out the intolerable sounds of painted smiles As the dribble out in gay piercing colorful laughs All the while knowing pain is on its way-- To save me. The magnanimous spirt of urt kindly pauses for me, Clears my jecitc and chaotic life, And bathes me in pure agony. Stops the excruciating pleasure Darkens my mood until I forget the happiness was ever there. My tears praise the torture one by one While they extinguish the fire that once burned inside my heart, Until it is once again cold. and I greatfully wrap myself in the familar coolness of depression Home, once again.