Black Poetry : Pain...(i was sad and just started writing..i know its bad...)

Discussion in 'Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On!' started by baglady, Apr 16, 2004.

  1. baglady

    baglady Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2003
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    0
    Occupation:
    Student in Cali
    Location:
    dad:woodland hills, ca ; mom: hidden hills, ca
    Ratings:
    +0
    PAIN...
    If one is to truly experience pain
    they must receive the full brunt of it
    One must be...
    Beaten
    Tortured
    Kicked
    and Ravished
    by mans ways
    to be stabbed in the back
    or kicked while your down.
    to be tatured by mans iniquities.....
    For mans intentions and loyalty is incalcuable.
    there are snakes
    fakes
    and phonies
    jelouse ones
    and real homies
    No one to talk to,
    but many to hate you...

    Sorry y'all i know it aint good, im only 14 and i was mad/sad, so i just started writing..
    :oops:
     
  2. THEONE

    THEONE Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2004
    Messages:
    743
    Likes Received:
    4
    Occupation:
    Educator
    Location:
    Indianapolis, IN
    Ratings:
    +4
    Hey, no need for apologies, lthis was GREAT!! nice flow
     
  3. Nita

    Nita Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2001
    Messages:
    3,096
    Likes Received:
    15
    Occupation:
    youth volunteer
    Location:
    Arkansas
    Ratings:
    +17
    right

    No need for sorry..you dropped this one from your heart, andthat's all that matters, jus keep on lettin it flow like you know :) :wave:
     
  4. $$RICH$$

    $$RICH$$ Lyon King Admin. STAFF

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2001
    Messages:
    69,983
    Likes Received:
    3,978
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    BUSINESS owner
    Location:
    Da~WINDY*CITY //CHICAGO
    Ratings:
    +4,178
    feeling you anger the hurt and sorrow no need to be sorry ya heart
    had to release the drama well felt it will only heal now keep da faith
     
  5. twision

    twision Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    May 26, 2003
    Messages:
    380
    Likes Received:
    8
    Occupation:
    Telemetry technician
    Location:
    Somewhere in the dirty, dirty
    Ratings:
    +10
    Listen,
    You scribed well.
    Never write to impress anyone
    Or apologize prematurely thinking they won't be impressed.
    It's never about that
    It's about what's in your heart.
    Critics come a dime a dozen
    And most times those that criticize
    CAN DO BETTER!

    I LIKE YOUR FLOW.
    It has a hint of desperation in it.
    A feeling most of us have from time to time.
    You expressed it!

    Keep scribin!


    PEACE AND LOVE
    twision
     
  6. watzinaname

    watzinaname Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Oct 4, 2003
    Messages:
    16,340
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Northeast
    Ratings:
    +122
    I agree with twision this is well felt by many, I'm sure. What saddens me is that at your tender age, you are feeling this, but I know that pain doesn't know anything about age discrimination. You wrote your pain down and allowed it to flow, it was so clear you could almost see it.
     
  7. the_story

    the_story Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2003
    Messages:
    1,410
    Likes Received:
    1
    Occupation:
    n/a
    Location:
    in your atmosphere...
    Ratings:
    +1
    hey baglady, i loved this poem, thanks for sharing...i hope this flow gave u some release...
    :heart:
    -story
     
  8. MANASIAC

    MANASIAC Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Country:
    United States
    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2004
    Messages:
    1,904
    Likes Received:
    37
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Technical Analyst
    Location:
    ATL SHAWTY! Mr. Coli Park
    Ratings:
    +38
    Nice Poem. Nice Poem.
     
  9. queentswana

    queentswana Well-Known Member MEMBER

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2004
    Messages:
    7,007
    Likes Received:
    160
    Occupation:
    day care provider (own business)
    Location:
    Brick City
    Ratings:
    +161
    Surely I hope you felt some pressure ease up off you...because it's better out...than in.
    Do keep your head up and keep going...
     
Loading...